


To Enchant

by Werecakes



Series: To See [1]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Horror, Alternate Universe - Hunters, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Dark, Dolls, Fili and Frerin kind of have it tough, I marked the chapters you shouldn't read at night, I'm not lying, Kili's pretty damn cool, M/M, Magic, Witches, Wizards, by just reading this you're interested, dolls are creepy, it starts off a bit slow and sad but it totally gets better, it's worth reading, yes - Freeform, you will get nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-09
Updated: 2014-08-12
Packaged: 2018-01-11 16:52:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 31
Words: 58,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1175498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Werecakes/pseuds/Werecakes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kili hasn't been home in years after he let to go to university.<br/>Coming back for Spring Break would issue a new chapter in his life as he meets someone new. Fili. Something about Fili grips him and he doesn't know what it seems to be that pulls his attention continuously to the blond. He quickly becomes friends with him, but the more he discovers about his new friend the stranger things get.<br/>When the truth is finally revealed he has a choice to make; help his childhood friends in their battle against dark forces, or protect the monster he had fallen in love with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Fili pulled his feet up closer to his body, his cheap black and white shoes matching his worn jeans and ratty coat. He leaned his head back looking up at the cloud covered sky. It was going to rain any moment, he could feel the familiar ache as he he closed his eyes. The first rain drop that fell landed on his hand, the next hit his pants. He waited as the spring rain started to drum down on him, padding softly onto his cheeks as he laid back onto the finely cut grass. He laced his fingers over his stomach, staring up at the sky only tilting his head to the side after a rain drop almost hit him in the eye. No one was beside him, though he did like to pretend. Imagine that familiar form stretched out and pointing a finger up to the sky. He liked to pretend that once sweet voice that made everything okay was talking to him. Sometimes he would hold a one sided conversation, soothing out the churning waters inside him that tried to drown his soul. Today he couldn’t imagine the figure, couldn’t hear the voice in his mind. He was so tired. Having lost sleep for another night in a row. Whenever he closed his eyes he relived it, could still feel that drop in his stomach as if taking another step on the stairs only to find nothing there to catch his fall. He tumbled into a free fall into that familiar darkness once again, but this time it was a different plumet. It didn’t hurt as much, not as much as the first time, but it still stung like a bee sting to the heart. 

He slowly blinked, enjoying the silence that was offered. The view was nice, a gentle rolling hill that looked over a beautiful field, a good view of the mountains that cradled the tiny valley. Only a few erect slabs of stone marred his view of the field, but it was understandable and forgivable considering where he was.

He blinked once, then twice, before his eyes wouldn’t open any longer and he fell asleep out in the rain, stretched out beside a grave.

\-------------------

It was late at night when Kili pushed himself into the coffee shop. He had a long night ahead of him. He had to pull yet another all nighter to cram as much study time as he could in for college. Even though he was supposed to be on vacation he found that most professors were evil in the course he was taking and had assigned a relentless amount of essays that were due the day he got back from spring break.

“I’m sorry but we’re closing.” The lady behind the counter was wiping down some of the equipment.

“I know, I know, but please, I need a triple shot espresso to go. I’ll give you double the price of the coffee for your trouble.” Kili was already reaching into his back pocket for his wallet.

She heaved a sigh and started to work on his order. The shop bell rung as someone else came in. He glanced back when he heard the slopping of wet shoes. His eyes barely glanced over the person, taking in their second hand clothing and hunched over shoulders as they hugged themselves. The barista told him the total for his order, he paid as much as he had promised before taking the paper cup. He sidestepped the growing puddle under the shivering figure and headed out. He juggled his keys in one hand, dropping them into a puddle in the parking lot. He was about to bend over and get them when the person from inside had beaten him to it. Picking them up and handing them to him.

“Here.” Their voice was barely a whisper.

“Thanks.” Kili couldn’t help but stare as he wrapped his fingers around the keys. Those eyes… they were… something about his eyes made him feel heavy inside.

The blond turned away, sniffling and wrapping an arm around his chest, one hand holding a steaming cup of hot water, the tea back in it not having enough time to steep. Kili continued to stare, watching the figure walk down the sidewalk in the little town that was already asleep. His attention was only pulled away when his keys had slipped from his fingers once again. 

“Shit.” He dipped down and pulled them out of the cold puddle. He looked back up and the person was gone.

He shook his head trying to rid himself of that pressing feeling in his stomach. He had to get home before his parents saw that he had taken the car without their permission. 

\-------------------------

Frerin was beside himself. The town they lived in was small, barely big enough to have only one grocery store, bowling alley, and a museum. The sad excuse for what they call a hotel looked like a glorified two story coffee stand. He had driven each street at least three times, checked the baseball field, went down every route he knew Fili took, even went past the horse pasture to see if he was “socializing with his friends”, which was talk of the town’s folk describing Fili stand by the barbed wire fence and feeding the McGorman’s horses apples and oats. 

He turned another corner to the main road that fed through the small town of Chewelah. His headlights caught on the familiar figure of gold hair and dark clothing, walking in the rain and holding a paper cup in one hand. He slammed on his breaks, shifted the jeep into park, and nearly fell onto the road in his race to get out of the vehicle; engine still running, and leaving the door open.

“Fili!” He ran in front of the jeep and to the sidewalk. He stopped short of bodily running into him. “Where the hell have you been?! You’re soaked through!”

“S-Sorry.” Fili’s teeth chattered as he brought the paper cup up to his mouth, sipping on the steaming tea. His fingers were red from the cold despite his attempts to keep them warm. 

Frerin shrugged off his coat, wrapping it around shoulders that were smaller than his even though they did not differ greatly in age. He slung an arm around Fili’s shoulders and ushered him quickly to the car. Soon as Fili was seated, Frerin leaned over him and was adjusting all of the vents to point at the sopping, shivering mess that sniffled. He cranked up the heat before closing the door and going around to the driver’s side and getting in himself. 

“Can you feel the heat?” 

Fili nodded, sniffing as the temperature change of the air made his nose run.

“When we get home you’re taking a boiling hot bath, you’re eating and drinking whatever _I_ put in front of you and you’re telling me where the fuck you’ve been all day!” He continued to grumble, as he threw the jeep into geer heading home. 

Fili tuned him out, leaning back in his seat and watching the dark world pass by. House lights were already being turned off, delving the town into the world of night. He craned his neck, trying to look up at the sky, there were a few stars visible through the rainy clouds. He liked stars, they let him focus on something other than the echos in his heart. There was always a sense of wonderment that they brought with them, emptying him out so that all there was were the tiny pinpricks above. When the clouds covered the stars once again he closed his eyes. He still felt so tired, completely drained despite sleeping earlier. It did occur to him that he may start to be getting sick but he brushed it off. He always got sick, but being caught out in the rain never did it to him. He barely noticed when they got home, only the slam of Frerin’s door jerked him out of his thoughts.

He got out, following the man that had the same color of blond hair as himself. They went into the house where Frerin quickly shoved him into the bathroom. While he stood in the shower, the warm water sliding down his back the bathroom door opened up. Frerin pushed back the shower curtain his hand going under the water.

“Hey!” Fili protested.

“I said, ‘hot bath’ not ‘warm shower’.” He cranked up the heat to the water and put the rubber stopper into the tub.

“Thank you for invading my privacy for that.”

“When you wake up the morning and not coughing and free of a runny nose, you’re going to thank me. Clean clothes on the counter, and I’m serious, once you’re done I want to see you in the kitchen.”

Frerin left, closing the door behind him. Fili slid down into the tub, pulling up his knees as he let it fill through the shower, the hot water falling over his head. He could feel the cold rain, slip over his scalp and over his shoulders. He let out a heavy sigh, moving took a lot of effort, but still he managed to wash his hair and do a brief rub down with a bar of soap. When he was rinsed off he unplugged the bathtub and turned off the shower. He stood up, letting the water drip. He closed his eyes again, willing himself back into motion. Frerin would chase him to his room if he didn’t go and eat. He would badger him until Fili finally snapped and yelled at the top of his lungs in a long winded rant about how fucking unfair life was only to regret his words later. He just had to bear down and do it.

He got dressed slowly, before venturing out, dragging his feet. He hesitated by the entrance to the kitchen. Inside Frerin was cooking, his long hair tied back, apron on. He was tossing some rice in a skillet there was already a platter of almond chicken on the island, two plates set out with chop sticks so they could eat in the kitchen. Fili pulled at the sleeve of his brown shirt, suddenly feeling worse than before. Frerin was cooking Fili’s favorite, it meant one of three things, it was Fili’s birthday, Thorin wasn’t coming home, or… he was worried to the point he was about to cry. And he had only seen Frerin cry a few times… Fili hated seeing him cry.

“Is he… going to come home soon?” Fili asked softly.

“Yeah.” Frerin cleared his throat as he turned off the stove top. “In uh, in June as scheduled. ...Fili?”

He didn’t respond, slowly pulling himself into the kitchen to take a seat at the island on a bar stool. 

“You know I love you, right?”

“I know.” Fili whispered, his vision started to blur as his eyes stung. He slipped hand over his eyes. “I’m sorry… I… I had to see her again… but no matter how many times I go there. I can’t… I just can’t…”

Strong arms wrapped around him, holding him close as a choked sob ripped from Fili’s throat. He grabbed fistfuls of Frerin’s shirt, crying shamefully like a little boy.


	2. Chapter 2

Kili had finished his paper, got a decent amount of sleep and now he was town over in the only bookshop that would be around for over an hour’s drive. Two of his old high school friends had said to meet up with him soon as they were off work. Bard had worked at a local automotive parts store, Tauriel worked as a cashier at a local grocery store where a Starbucks was situated in. He found a little seat to plop himself down on as he waited for his friends to show up. He had his fill of books for his vacation, he only had three more days until he had to head back to college until summer. 

The shop bell ringed making him look up from the spot on the carpet he had been staring. He had hoped it was one of his friends but all he saw was a blond man, it was wavy and probably more fluffy than any furball he had ever seen. It was tied back and he looked remarkably well kept for having such wild hair. He looked around a little before turning when someone came running past the display window and into the shop. Kili felt his heart skip a beat. It was him.

The one from the other night. Black coat, black jeans, hair just as golden as the first man. The two say something, their voices low and all Kili could do was stare. The younger blond nodded then caught Kili’s gaze. His eyes held that same look that bothered Kili. Then he was looking away, going further into the shop with the other who greeted the shopkeeper. The younger disappeared into the stacks while the other continued his conversation. Kili found himself getting up out of his seat. He walked quietly to the other side of the stacks, looking through the different aisles until he found the blond. His fingers were brushing over the spines of different books before pulling away. His blue gaze glided over each title, his head tilting to the side to read some of them. And all Kili could do was watch him.

He took out one book from the shelf, flipping it open and skimming over the contents before putting it back with a light snort of distaste. He found another, pulling it out and opening it. He repeated this with several books before a sigh passed his lips, his fingers lingering on the last book that had caught his interest. 

Kili moved forward, his eyes glancing at the titles that the other had been looking at. “Parapsychology?” 

The blond turned around enough to look over his shoulder, those bright blue eyes regarded Kili in a guarded way as if Kili would say or do something to him.

Kili tapped the spine of the book that the other had just been looking at. “Ghosts.”

He frowned.

Kili scrambled to try to get the other to talk. Something about the blond bothered him. “Uh…” He coughed out a laugh. “I, uh… well, to be honest I think they are kind of interesting. EVPs are interesting but what I think is the most interesting are the photographs. Something about film being able to capture the images of the dead, or what we think are the dead, the different forms of orbs, rods, ribbons, and mist, sometimes you get full spectral apparitions that look flesh and blood. New photos come out every day but what I think are the most interesting ones are the old ones. The photographs of ectoplasm were only at those times-”

“Not really. There was a case in the 90’s that had video documentation of ectoplasm, it was coming out of a cupboard, they took a sample and found it to be closely related to human blood plasma.”

Kili couldn’t help but smile. The voice was soft and a little low in tone, it held a slight accent that made the words almost sound like a purr.

“So, you like parapsychology. What else do you like to read?”

Blue eyes looked over to a small section marked Scifi/Fantasy, the gaze lingered a bit before looking down to the ground. 

“Don’t talk much do you?” Kili grabbed the blond’s jacket by the shoulder and pulled him along to the Scifi/Fantasy section. “So, what do you like from this section?”

He was shaken off. “Not much,” was huffed out.

“I saw you looking over here.”

“I was looking over there.” The blond pointed to the corner past the section they were in to the young readers. “If you want good fantasy, something that will tantalize your senses, you want the books from there.”

“Oh?”

“Adults have limited imaginations, everything they write revolves around three elements; sex, drugs, and murder.”

“Four if you count money.”

“Money is only a way to a means. When was the last time you read a story in the adult fiction section where someone wasn’t murdered because of money? Where some politician or some big wig was scandalized by an act of sex or drugs was involved in the story? In each story you will find one of these elements and it’s boring.” He was moving now over to the young readers, actually animated in what he said. “But things written for teenagers, for children, it’s beautiful. Dragons fly upon high, dwarves dig in the earth, elves live in the forests and it’s all around us from ancient times all the way to the future. Worlds held in paintings open up to someone with a special key, cats talk and dance, the moon grins and asks the crow for a little show. And all the while sex, drugs, and murder are left behind. They can be mentioned, dallied with upon imagination of the reader but if someone is killed in these books, in these stories, it’s because of something bigger than the greed of money, more important than lust after some brain dead trollip, and the drugs are weapons used against enemies not some plot point to find someone in a crack den.”

“What do you recommend?”

“Anything by Garth Nix is good, the Ranger’s Apprentice is a good series as well as the Spook’s Apprentice. If you’re into puke inducing fluff mixed with blood lust then Twilight, though I’ve only watched the movies Riffed.”

“Riffed?”

“Riff Trax, look them up.”

“... Harry Potter is in this section as well, isn’t it?”

“Yep. Though, I haven’t read them.”

“You haven’t read Harry Potter? Who- What?! Who hasn’t read Harry Potter?”

He got a half shrug. The young man pulled off the fifth book to the Spook’s Apprentice series, looking at the back to make sure that it was the one he wanted.

“Okay, no. I’m a total Pottertard, I can’t let this slide.” Kili looked around until he found the first book of Harry Potter. He went to the front of the store where the man his new friend came in with. He was standing by the cash register, waiting calmly. 

“Yeah, hi, just this book please?” Kili dug for his wallet, paying for the book. He padded down his pockets before asking, “Do you have a pen?”

He got the pen and wrote on the inside of the cover. He glanced over when his new friend showed up as he continued to write. The other was buying two other books and Kili started to talk. “Okay, so here is all my info, cell phone number, email address, skype name, all that wonderful fuckery.” He closed the book, handed the pen back to the cashier then held out the book. “You are going to read this and completely thank me.”

Blue eyes stared at him. Silence stretching in the store.

“Fili,” the older blond caught their attention. “He’s trying to be friends, the least you can do is give him a chance.”

Fili’s gaze darted around in uncertainty. 

“If it helps, my name is Kili and you can laugh about the irony of how our names rhyme.”

Fili smiled at this. He took the book and added it to his little stack. 

“You know, I don’t believe I’ve ever seen you around.” The other blond said. He held out his hand, “Frerin Oakenshield.”

Kili shook his hand. “Kili Durinson. I’m not really from here, I only spent the last few years of high school here, now I’m going to college at EWU. Currently on spring vacation and I’ll be gracing this place once again with my presence on my summer vacation.”

“What’s your major?”

“Still trying to figure that out to be honest, but I want to get into creative writing.” He looked to Fili and gave a small wink. “To write about dragons that fly upon high and dwarves that delve deep.”

“Best research for that are folklores.” Fili piped up. “Dwarves originated from norse mythology so the best stories are European.”

“Fili has a bit of a thing for dwarves.” Frerin winked.

“Dad!” Fili’s cheeks flushed bright red.

“Nothing to be ashamed of. Dwarves are better built, wiser, and in norse mythology better craftsmen than the gods, I say ‘fuck elves’ they’re all glamour and stealing babies from cribs.”

“That’s trolls.” Fili and Kili said at the same time.

Frerin laughed. “My bad. I’ll see if I can remember it for next time so I don’t ruffle any feathers. Now, if you two are done psychically connecting I need to drag you around town some more, Fili. It was nice meeting you Kili.”

“Nice meeting you too.”

“Oh, uh,” Fili dug around his pockets finally pulling out a very simple cellphone. He flipped through the different options before handing it over to Kili, showing his cell number. “I can never remember it, so, um… yeah, write it down or something.”

Kili pulled out his, much sleeker and with internet connection and web browsing options. He flicked through a few options before punching in the numbers and saving it to his contacts. He gave it a quick ring to make sure he did it right. He smiled and handed it back to Fili who didn’t say goodbye but slipped out the shop with Frerin. 

Kili waited for a bit before dialing Fili’s number again. He waited and heard a “hello?”

“You forgot to say goodbye.”

He was hung up on which only made him grin. Oh, he liked Fili.


	3. Chapter 3

“Did you see?” Tauriel asked as she handed out some paper cups of fancy coffee she got from the coffee station set up in the grocery store she worked in. They were gathered on the sidewalk of the bookstore as drinks were not allowed inside. “It was straight out of a cryptozoology program.”

“Or Unsolved Mysteries.” Bard took a drink before patting his back pocket where his work gloves were sticking out. He still had oil splattered on his shirt and grime on his cheek, not looking as if he cared at all that it was there, or he hadn’t noticed. 

“What the hell are you two talking about?” Kili asked.

“The freaks,” Bard stated. He let it drop as if that was all that needed to be said.

Kili stared at him and made a motion of his hand. Bard stared at him for a moment before Kili’s face turned into an exaggerated scowl and he over did the motion once more to show that he needed his friend to elaborate. He had been at school the whole damn time, this was the first time he was able to come home after two years of constant school and summer jobs. It seemed that Bard and Tauriel were easy in forgetting the long span of time that had been since the last time they had gotten to be around the brunet.

“Oh-uh- The Freaks are these two guys, look almost like fuckin’ clones if it wasn’t for their noses. Moved around here, somewhere, not sure where,” Bard gave a shrug of his shoulder. 

“And they are called ‘freaks’ why?” Kili felt something tightening inside his stomach. He never was teased in school, grew up being the heart throb that caused girls to blush and run away from him or have his choice of the preppie to date. But one thing he didn’t like, now that he was older was teasing and name calling. He didn’t do it himself but he never saw the damage until someone in his dormitory had committed suicide in freshman year due to immature idiots teasing the poor guy. Kili had been there when the ambulance showed up, he had been going to visit Nori who lived on that floor. It was only a glimpse but he did see the side of a body hanging from the ceiling.

“Never see them, only hear about them.” Tauriel jutted her hip to the side. “No one knows where they live, don’t know how they get their food or clothes, and only some times they are seen outside. Most people see them in fields, during the summer, working on something.”

Kili looked at his friends for a moment before rubbing at his temple. “You… are you serious?”

“What?”

“What?” Kili parroted but with a laugh. “You guys, you do realize you are adults right? Use reasoning.”

“Two years and no one knows where they live?” Bard raised a brow.

“I lived around here most of my life and only a handful of people know where the hell my house is.”

“That’s because your parents own twenty acres on the side of a fucking mountain side. And you don’t have a clone of yourself that you’re never seen away from. They’re freaks.” 

“And why can’t they be a little bit out of town and just like to stay home? Maybe they work from home? What if they do a lot of shit that keeps them busy in other towns and they do their shopping there? News flash! A lot of people fucking commut! And-” He gave a fake gasp. “Could it be that they be related? Or, god forbid, twins?”

“Wow, who shoved a stick up your ass?”

“Fuck, Bard, you’re an adult. Don’t be a dick.” Kili scowled. “They’re just normal people that are probably wondering why the hell others are calling them freaks because they dared to fucking come to a lick spit town to live.”

Bard looked at Tauriel. “You believing this shit?”

She gave a shrug of her shoulders. “He has a point. They probably did just come here to get away from some big city and we’re making too much out of it.”

“Thank you!” Kili shouted. “Now can we please just hang out and not throw insults at innocent people like stupid children?”

\--------------------------------------

Frerin leaned back, his hands on his back as he grimaced, feeling his vertebra pop from the motion. Having brought in a large load of groceries. Fili came in behind him, plastic sacks lining his forearms as he easily placed them down with a hard thud on the counter.

“Uuuugh, I am getting **old**!”

“You’re only as old as you feel.” Fili said with a slight smile. 

“Is it possible to feel one hundred and eighty?” Frerin grabbed a few things off of the counter so that Fili could shove the sacks on more when the youth caught a few that were about to fall.

“If you can imagine how dust can feel… then yeah.” 

“Smart ass.” Frerin swatted at Fili’s butt.

“Yep, that’s me, so intelligent that my average ass molecule is smarter than a high schooler.”

“You joke about that but I’m pretty sure you’re right. Compared to the people around here your farts could govern them and get this town back on track.”

“My fa-” Fili groaned, rubbing his forehead. “How do I know you, again?”

There was a sudden weight over his back, pressing down on him and bending him over as strong arms wrapped around him. He was rocked to the side as Frerin’s whiskery chin rubbed into Fili’s cheek. He smiled as he was rocked to the other side causing his other foot to lift off of the floor. Frerin’s voice came out patronizingly sweet and baby-ish as if he was talking to a small child. “Because I wuv you and you’re all mine.”

Fili gave a small laugh which got him a tighter hug. Frerin stilled his movements and snuggled Fili from behind some more.

“Hey, you going to let me go any time soon?”

“Nnnnoh!” Frerin squeezed him tighter.

“You’re crushing me!” Fili kicked out his leg in protest.

“Then you’re being crushed by dust, what a way to go!”

Fili was about to say something else when the house phone started to ring. There were very few that called them so it was easy to know who it was. Frerin dropped Fili earning a punch in the shoulder for his manhandling. He only grinned and messed up Fili’s hair while going to the phone and picking up the receiver. The younger shook his head and set about putting away groceries that belonged in the freezer and fridge first, taking his time to cut and section the meats into zip lock bags that they could freeze for meals. He deliberately took his time, if it was Thorin calling then Frerin would want to talk to him in private for a bit before passing the phone over to Fili. It was a bit of a tradition since Thorin was enlisted in the airforce. He spent so much time away from home that whenever he called they both would take their time just to spend alone, listening to his deep rumbling voice. He made sure Frerin always got to talk to him first, it hurt sometimes, because the call would be cut off after just a minute and it left them in constant worry until he called again. But Frerin was Thorin’s husband and Fili didn’t want to rob him of that.

He was in the middle of putting away the canned goods when something didn’t feel quite right. He had placed a can in the cupboard, hand still on it, when he heard the shaking breath of Frerin, the older man coming into the kitchen. 

“Hey, don’t worry… yeah… I love you too. H-Here’s Fili.” Frerin passed the receiver to Fili, not sparing him a glance as he left.

“Thorin?” Fili pressed the phone up to his ear.

_”Hi. You’ll make sure he’s okay after hanging up?”_

“Why is he upset? Are you… Are you not going to be coming home again?”

He heard Thorin swallow, his own breathing ragged and strained as he tried to keep his voice calm.

_”We got a-ah-a bunch of new recruits that I have to train…”_

“Wha-ha- but…” He felt his throat constrict. His hand started to shake, he switched the phone to his other hand, tucking his shaking one across his chest and under his arm. He leaned back against the counter. He tried to keep himself from freaking out. This would be the fifth time they would differ his discharge. He had already applied for a desk job. Something local! Something that would help him come home to his family where he belonged! But the Air Force kept him, held on to him, he was a General Air Force Chief of Staff, he was almost a complete General. He had so many damn decorations, pins, badges, and medals that his uniform looked lopsided. 

_”I’m sorry, Fili. I’ll… I’ll try to push harder to be able to come home. And I will come home… You know that I will, right?”_

Fili nodded, his voice tiny. “Yeah.”

_”Um…” Thorin tried to grab for anything to cheer the other up. “Frerin said you made a new friend… A boy who’s name rhyme’s with yours. Wh...What’s his name? Vili? Koli?”_

“You’ve been in Finland too long…” Fili sniffed a little trying not to cry. “His, uh, his name is Kili.”

Thorin couldn’t help it. He had to laugh. _”You always did say you liked goats.”_

“What?”

_”Kili means kid in Finish.”_

The silence made Thorin sigh and elaborate. _”A baby goat.”_

“Yeah, I get it… just… don’t feel like laughing.”

Thorin sighed again, this time it was heavy. _”I know… …...Fili… Frerin said you had gone and visited her again…”_

Fili ran his hand over his face. “Yeah…”

_”...Take my advice, lad. Remember her, but don’t let her memory haunt you. Unrequited love is the worst form of poison. I know you loved her but she didn’t- ”_

“You don’t know that!” Fili shouted.

_”You don’t know it either… it’s been 14 years Fili, let her go. Live your life, not a memory and a world of what ifs.”_

“It’s all I have.” His voice broke. “What if Thorin doesn’t come home? What if something happened to Frerin? What if, what if!”

_”I will come home! I will…”_

The blond felt tears stinging his eyes, the familiar cold grip of sadness clawing at his insides. “Okay.” He whispered, nodding again. “Okay… I, uh… I should check up on Frerin.”

_“Fili?”_

“Yeah?”

_“I love you.”_

“I love you too… just… _come home._ ” The last bit was so soft and broken, he sounded like a small child.

He said a soft goodbye, hanging up. The phone clattered to the kitchen counter, the noise louder than it should be in the quiet house.

He took a moment, steading his breath. It always felt like a harsh blow, each time, leaving him raw inside as if he had been beaten bloody. He hadn’t seen Thorin in years, save for a few video calls on the computer and eat time he had a bit more gray in his hair, another wrinkle to his skin. Each time he looked so different that Fili felt as if he could not identify the man if it had not been for his voice and the tattoos on his fingers of knot work, one over each ring finger, symbols of Frerin and Fili.

Resting his hands on the counter he leaned forward, letting out a long breath. He wanted to scream, the lash out. This was yet another thing that made his life as shitty as it was. It didn’t help that his emotions had been compromised about Thorin not coming home but for him to bring _her_ up. The sorest subject of his life. He could talk about the other crap that happened, it could get hard and make him flinch but he could do it without feeling like he needed to break down and cry.

Once he had gathered himself Fili quietly sought his way through the house. He gave a little knock to Frerin’s bedroom door before opening it without waiting to be invited in. Sure enough Frerin was laying on the bed, curled up in a ball, holding himself as he stared at a photo on the nightstand of Thorin, smiling and in his uniform. Fili didn’t say anything as he came up to the bed. It dipped under his weight as he sat down, taking off his shoes. The sounds of them dropping to the floor was just as loud as the clatter of the phone from earlier, too loud and leaving a feeling of oppression. 

He crawled over the bed, laying on his side. He worked an arm under Frerin’s head, the other wrapping around his waist. His legs tucked up behind the other’s and he waited. They both didn’t say anything, not making a sound besides labored breathing and small sniffles. 

He could feel his sleeve start to get wet from tears, as he pressed his face against Frerin’s shoulder, squeezing his arms, trying his best to lend as much sympathetic comfort as he could.


	4. Chapter 4

Kili stood on the road, it was in the middle of the night, tomorrow would be the last day of his spring vacation and he would have to go back to university. He wasn’t too sure what he would do with his summer. He was tempted to just get another job and stay in the big city but something… something was nagging at him. He would be lying if he said it had nothing to do with a particular set of blue eyes. Something about them seemed… off. It bothered him. Bothered him so badly that he borrowed his parent’s car again to walk around in the middle of the night in town. 

Chewelah was always a quiet place, nothing big ever happened, the creek that ran through the middle of the town would swell and flood some places during the spring but that was the worst of it, besides Chautauqua. That summer festival always over ran the place with visitors and everyone was reminded just how small Chewelah truly was. Cars would park in people’s lawns, line the streets and fill every parking lot. It was great for business but locals could never wait for the week long celebration to end.

He sighed as he looked around, taking in the small, old, buildings. A part of him hated that place, the people were not very friendly and everyone kept to themselves. The other part knew that this was home. It would always call to him. Make him miss the tall pine forests, the copper steeple of the white church that could be seen for miles. In his studies during the winter he missed seeing snow on the ground that would come up to his knees during the mild winters, the snow could get up to his chest on a normal one. He missed so much about this place. The quiet, the fresh air, even the creepy museum that had that block that had four devil faces on it that was said to be “faces of the saints” that was found under some church step way back in the day. 

Maybe… maybe he would come back for the summer. Have an actual vacation for once.

Kili picked up his feet and continued to wander the streets, taking in the solitary quiet of it all. He felt anxious for travel, he felt sad for having to leave again, and those eyes. Those damn eyes…

Something was wrong with them. Something he couldn’t place. 

Fili looked normal, sounded normal besides being guarded. He showed all the signs of that kid that had killed himself at the dorms; quiet, jumpy, a desire to be left alone… old… haunted…

Kili stopped in his tracks. Haunted? Why would he think that? He didn’t know anything about Fili besides the fact that he liked ghosts and fantasy. Most people who talk about ghosts always delve into how they were haunted at some point or another or even claim to be psychic. That was always so annoying to hear. He could never stop himself from rolling his eyes and feeling somewhat cheated when someone said “energies” when talking about a place that was allegedly haunted or someone who wanted to know of a dead friend or relative.

He sighed rubbing at the back of his short hair, nails scratching at his scalp. He missed his pony tail. It had been a good idea at the time to cut it and keep it short for work but now he was regretting his decision. As long as he kept it clean and tied back he could have worked any job.

God… his mind was going everywhere that night. Musing over everything random just so he wouldn’t have to focus on the real reason he couldn’t sleep. Fili was bothering him and he still couldn’t narrow down exactly the reason behind it. Sure he showed signs of being teased and tormented but that Frerin guy seemed really close to Fili, they acted relaxed around each other and Frerin was friendly. So… what the hell was his problem with Fili?!

“Fucking hell.” He huffed out. “What’s wrong with me?”

He folded his arms over his chest, continuing to walk, not caring where he went. It was always easy to get back to where you started from in Chewelah. 

It wasn’t until he started to get pretty cold that he decided to look around to see where exactly he was. 

“Shit.” He turned around in a circle. He had gone pretty far, he was technically outside of town. He wasn’t very familiar with this road, squeezed on either side by forest and thick underbrush. Kili took solace in the fact that the full moon was gleaming down, bright as a street light, making it rather easy for him to see.

He turned around, tracing back at least the road. He should be able to find his way back to the car soon as he found a crossing street. It was only a few minutes of walking before he saw it. 

A sight that halted his steps.

He recognized the long hair, the puffy volume that mimicked a lion’s mane. 

Fili was moving across the road, eyes up to the sky. He went across to the gravelled shoulder and stood there. His golden hair looked like gossamer, adapting to the color of the moonlight. He wore dark clothing, a long white shirt stuck out from under his black button up. He had bracelets on one wrist that consisted of knots and beads. In his hands was a simple white envelope, forgotten for the moment.

Kili watched him, soaking in the moonlight as if it was sunshine. He looked… regal, poised and full of purpose, so much different from the man he met in the book store. 

“Fili!” The name was called, pulling both of their attention towards the voice. 

Frerin emerged out of the shadows, not wearing a shirt, showing an intricate design of celtic or viking knotting that formed an arrow up his spine and across his shoulders. He didn’t have any shoes either and had two cans of soda that he carried. 

“I thought you were going to mail a letter not go moon gazing without me.”

“Sorry… but it looks really good from here.” Fili took one of the cans and looked back up into the sky.

Kili felt awkward. He didn’t know if he should say hello or continue walking or just stand there and stare like a creepy man in the bushes. Both of them they looked… he didn’t have much of description beyond “beautiful”. Like gods upon the earth, living marble statues crafted by the most talented sculpture. 

Thankfully it was Frerin that put movement into the situation.

“Go mail your letter before we both forget.” He patted Fili on the back. 

Fili went back across the road, disappearing into the shadows on the other side. Kili could hear the rusted hinges of the mailbox working as it was opened and closed. He took this moment to start walking again, hoping silently that he could slip by unnoticed. Frerin didn’t look down from the moon, Fili was busy and Kili just looked like a human shaped shadow on the edge of the moonlight.

There was a sound, like a startled gasp and a yelp mixed, before something went sailing through the air and collided into the side of Kili’s head sending him to the ground. Everything rushed around after that. Frerin saying, “What the hell?” followed by the sound of shoes on pavement rushing past him. “Frerin, hurry!” Fili shouted while grabbing at the other blond, yanking on him to run past Kili’s prone body.

Kili groaned, his hands coming up to his head that now throbbed. He blinked a few times seeing a dented, unopened, can of pepsi on the ground by him.

“Whoa, whoa, wait.” Frerin was pulling away from Fili and coming back to Kili.

“Frerin!”

“...Uh...Fili, it’s your friend.” Frerin said as he leaned over Kili. He reached down touching Kili’s face. Kili groaned and tried pulling away only to have Frerin shush him. “Shh-shh,shh, it’s okay. Let me take a look.”

He gently turned Kili’s head and moved his hand away, squinting in the dark. He ran his fingers lightly over the spot feeling the swell of flesh. With little effort he helped Kili up to his feet, keeping him steady as he swayed on his feet.

“Kili? Wha-... What the hell are you doing here?” Fili asked coming over, now seeing who it had been. “You scared the shit out of me.”

“If that’s you scared, I would hate to see you terrified.” Kili hissed and pressed his palm against his throbbing head. “And I was out walking, to clear my head. Should have wore a helmet, didn’t think walking was a contact sport.”

“Let’s get him inside.” Frerin grabbed one of Kili’s arms and slung it over his shoulder for support.

“I can walk on my own.”

“Trust me, you can’t.”

“Yeah, I can.” He protested, pulling away. He swayed back almost falling before being able to lean forward. He took a step and promptly fell. His knee cracking against the road, hands grabbed him before he could fully collapse. He grabbed onto sleeves, looking up at Fili’s face.

Those eyes that bothered him so much, back at him.


	5. Chapter 5

Kili held the bag of ice against his head as he laid on possibly the most comfortable couch he had ever encountered. In fact, this whole place was comfortable. It was very… normal. Wide rooms, normal neutral colors of paint on the walls. Though the furniture held an antique touch to it and he was certain that was a crank operated singer sewing machine against the wall. 

Foot steps came from behind the couch, he moved a bit trying not to feel the throb in his head while he attempted to catch a glimpse of who was coming. He felt a little leap in his chest when Fili came into view. His wavy hair was pulled back in a single loose braid, in his hands were some cans of soda and the godsend of junk food; potato chips. 

“You’re an angel, you know that right?” Kili grinned as a pepsi was dropped onto his stomach as well as the bag of chips.

“Angel of death more like it.” Fili mumbled, flopping down on an overstuffed chair. “Frerin’s right, you’ve got a concussion.”

“Worth it.” Kili hissed out, his voice bleeding into a groan as he slowly sat up. “Got to see you again before going back to college.”

Fili blinked at him, expression merging from neutral to confusion. “Why would you want to see me again?”

“You kidding me? After seeing you for the first time, my life has suddenly gotten exciting. First I meet this mysterious stranger in the middle of the night, it’s raining. The stranger picks up my keys and looks at me, his eyes whispering promises of secrets that my mind could never imagine.”

“Sounds like the beginnings of a romance novel.”

“Shut up and listen. Just think of it through a storyteller’s point of view. Now, The mysterious stranger stays in my mind until I see him walk into a quaint bookshop. Something about him still bothers me, pulls my attention like a continuous, weaving spell. I can’t help myself, I get up and follow him. I have to get to know him. He’s simple, calm, collected, and guarding those secrets in his eyes.”

“Let me just stop you right there.” Fili held up his hand. “You couldn’t stop thinking about me? Had to get to know me? That sounds rather creepy.”

Kili let out an exasperated sound. “Oh come on! I’m not trying to stalk you! I already told you that I was just walking to clear my head when you endangered my life with your soda can.”

A strange sound came from the blond. Kili smirked and looked at him. “Was that a laugh?”

“Nothing of the sort.”

“Yeah, it was a laugh. Fess up, you like me. Why else would you bring me into your house and stay up all night with me?”

“Probably because Frerin made me help him bring you inside and you’ve got a concussion so you can’t go to sleep for 24 hours and have to be monitored.”

Kili looked at the soda and bag of chips on his lap. His smile dropping a little. Silence pulled between the two, only the ticking of the grandfather clock gave sound. Fili was right, when Kili talked about it, which he was a pretty open person and said what was on his mind, it did sound as if he had fallen in love with the blond. He knew it wasn’t that, but he knew something did pull at him. It was an insistent tugging that dogged his sleep.

He swallowed. Glancing back up to Fili who was pulling a hardback book from an end table that was by his seat. The title on the spine was mostly rubbed out, edges tattered with use and age. Those blue eyes slid half closed as he made himself comfortable, flipping through the pages until he found what he was looking for. He crossed his legs and leaned back, fully.

He looked like he didn’t belong anywhere but there, in that antique looking seat, old book in hand.

“What are you?” Kili whispered.

“Hm?” Fili looked up to him, only hearing the edge of Kili’s question.

The brunet’s heart skipped from the thrill of being caught saying something he had not meant to. His mind scrambled for something to say in place of a thought that should not have been voiced. “What about you?”

“About me, what?” Fili opened his soda with one hand. 

“Well, you know I’m kind of from around here, well kind of. I live in a spot where a I got to kind of pick and choose which school district I went to. So the town, uh, Colville, where we met at the bookstore, I only went to highschool there. I went to elementary and jr. high around here. But now I’m going to college, want to be a book writer… what about you?”

A stare was all he got in return. Neutral, devoid of answers. He was starting to hate that look.

“How about this, Why do you call Frerin by his first name and not call him ‘dad’ like you did in the store?”

“He’s my adopted father.” Fili tapped his finger against his soda can.

“But-! You-!!... You look almost exactly the…” Kili’s eyes went big. The Freaks. Fili and Frerin were the two that Bard and Tauriel were talking about!

“The same? We get that a lot, people think that I’m actually his genetic child but I’m not. As for the age, he’s only a few years older than me. Soon as he was eighteen he pressed to adopt me.”

“Why?”

“Eat your chips.”

“...Do you guys work from home?”

“We don’t work.”

“Why?”

“Drink your soda.”

Okay… so that was the end of that line of questioning. Fili wasn’t very talkative it would seem, which meant he was most likely not very social. Which would be a problem for Kili since he was a social butterfly. He loved talking to complete strangers, getting to know people that he was warned against. He enjoyed pushing at the challenge of finding the good in others, no matter how far down he had to dig. He had friends in the city where he went to college that were into drugs and alcohol. He had friends that were in motorcycle gangs and ex-criminals, granted they probably wrapped up all of those traits into three people but he still knew them and they were still good people deep down. Hell, once he got his ass kicked and it was Dwalin, the ex-druggy biker that saved him from being curb checked.

“You know…” Kili’s voice was soft.

“Hm?”

He ran his thumb over the edge of the can that he picked up off of his lap. “I do have a kind of exciting life, in the aspect that I don’t know how to leave well enough alone.” His eyes went back to Fili’s, their gazes locking. “Usually it’s because I know there is something good about the person, deep down. I want to help them even if they don’t want it. I push and push until that person gives and I feel this rush of being a savior and I can pat myself on the back for the good deed.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

Kili tilted his head, “I don’t know, honestly… something about you just… pulls on me. It’s not the same pull though. You don’t strike me as the type of person that needs to be saved.”

“Then what do I need?” Fili leaned forward, his chest almost touching his crossed knee. He made sure not to break eye contact. “You say there is something strange about my eyes, something that seems to beckon to you like an enchanting spell. Ask yourself, why would I need to ensnare you?”

“That’s what I keep asking myself. What do you need? What is it about you that bothers me so much that I can’t stop thinking about you?” Kili felt his mouth go dry. “It’s not sexual attraction. It’s not a schoolgirl crush. It’s not that you’re popular or that you offer me some kind of self gratification.”

“It sounds to me as if you’re not asking the right questions.” Fili leaned back. “Finding the answers before the questions makes for a fruitless quest.”

“Then let’s get this one question answered that has been bothering me; I have known you for less than a day, bought you Harry Potter, and have been pegged in the head by your favorite drink, which by the way is nasty because Coke-a-Cola is the best, now I’m in your house eating your chips. Would you consider us friends?”

Fili smiled. He put down his book. “Yeah. We’re friends. And Pepsi is the best.”


	6. Chapter 6

Kili actually found it hard to say goodbye to Fili. The blond had walked him to his car in evening of the next day. They stood by it, quiet and shuffling their feet. They didn’t talk much the previous night, but Kili found himself admitting that was the best time he ever had hanging out with any of his friends. Fili was a soft presence. Someone he didn’t feel like he needed to prove himself to like with Tauriel, he always had to do something to keep her attention or she would turn it somewhere else. Fili wasn’t someone that he had to listen to bitch about how bad he’s got it like Bard, who actually had it pretty good he was just a whining brat at times. Fili didn’t ask for anything, he was just… him and he could tell that he was going to supply Kili the luxury of being himself as well.

“You’ll… uh, you’ll be online?” Kili finally asked.

Fili nodded. “And you have my cell number, I always have it charged and with minutes.”

“Yeah!” Kili cleared his throat. “Yeah, I have your number. I… I won’t see you until summer.” Why did he just say that? He wasn’t even sure if he was coming back for the summer!

Fili gave a little shrug. “I’m not going anywhere.”

The brunet couldn’t help the grin that pushed up his cheeks showing off his dimples. Blue eyes flickered up to his face before Fili turned around and started to walk away. “Drive safe, dimples.”

“If I didn’t know any better, that could have been taken as an insult.” He called back.

Fili stopped for a heartbeat, Kili watching him, hoping he would turn around, hoping to see a flicker of a smile once more, but he just walked forward, kept going. Kili heaved a sigh, juggling his keys in his hand before unlocking his car and getting in. He had to go home, get his stuff and start driving three or so hours to get back to his dorm. He jammed his key into the ignition and stared out his windshield at the retreating form of his new friend. He leaned against the steering wheel. 

“What is it about you that bothers me?” he mumbled. “I’ve seen others that never smile, I’ve seen people tortured by their pasts and haunted by regrets, but you… what the hell are you?”

Then Fili turned around, his forefingers coming up and pressing into his cheeks before giving a single wave, then he was back to walking. Kili smiled. Fili simply said, “Dimples, bye.”

He decided then, he shouldn’t let it get to him. Fili was Fili.

He started up his car and pulled out of the parking lot, driving the long way home, allowing himself to feel the gentle, content feeling that his new friend had left in his chest.

When he got home he was greeted by Tauriel’s truck pulled up next to his father’s SUV. He frowned, not knowing why she had come over for a visit, when she knew he would leave any time that day. He turned off his car, watching the front door open, his mom coming out with Tauriel close behind.

“Kili!” His mother came over. “Where did you go last night?”

“To a friend’s house.”

“Why didn’t you call me to tell me you were spending the night?”

“Because I wasn’t planning on it, it just, sort of happened. Hey, T-girl, why you here?”

“I came to make sure you got this!”

“......it’s a doll.” Kili looked at the thing that had been deposited in his hands. It looked creepily similar to him.

“Made it myself.” She chirped. “Wanted to give you a parting gift, something to look at to remind you of me, and to remind you to come home.”

“It looks like me… And if it’s to remind me of you shouldn’t it look like you? And it’s creepy, thanks for that.”

“Exactly, take it to your dorm and in no time flat you’ll want to bring it back yourself and it’s job is done! It brought you back for a visit.”

Kili’s eyes slid to half mast as his eyebrows raised. “Really? I could just chuck it out the window while driving down the highway.”

“You won’t.”

“I could.”

“But you won’t.”

“I hate you.”

“You love me.”

\--------------------------------------

“He’s weird.” Fili poked his food with his fork.

“You miss him.” Frerin nudged Fili’s leg from under the table. “And stop picking, actually eat your food.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You need to keep up your strength… for both our sakes.”

Fili barely managed to slip a few bites of his noodles into his mouth before his stomach started to churn. He pushed it to the side and shook his head. Frerin sighed, getting up and going to the fridge. He moved some things around before he found some packages of berries and grapes that he brought over to the table. He took Fili’s pasta away and placed it on the counter before wrapping it in plastic and putting it in the fridge. 

“Eat what you can.”

“I don’t want to eat.”

Frerin stood by the fridge, giving a sigh. He held up his arm, fingers curled and wrist presented. “Do you need a little~?” He shook his wrist in a silent gesture they both knew well.

Fili wrapped his arms around his stomach as he nodded. He hated doing this ever since _she_ died. It always felt wrong, out of place. But Frerin came up to him, stroking his hair with one hand, the other held a sharp knife. 

“I want you to eat something afterwards, okay?”

The younger of the two nodded, taking the knife with one hand, the other holding Frerin’s wrist out. The knife bit into the soft skin, red liquid welling up. Fili dropped the knife with a clatter as he wrapped his lips around the wound. He didn’t suck, not wanting to cause any more damage than necessary. He knew his giver could take a lot, a few times Fili had given into the hunger actually biting and chewing into the flesh. 

His tongue lapped at the cut, filling his mouth before he swallowed and repeating. He gave a little whimper when an image of Kili came across his mind. Of Kili offering his wrist for Fili’s mouth to lap at. Kili’s dark hair curtaining down as he whispered and kissed at Fili’s temple, warm palm soothing over him as he gave freely to what he needed. And he couldn’t help but moan at just the subtle intimacy of the imagery.


	7. Chapter 7

Kili gave another heavy sigh. It’s been a month and a half since he had left home, a month and a half since he’s had his creepy doll-self locked away in the bathroom, because he couldn’t help imagining it walked around under his bed or peering down at him from the shelf above him if it was anywhere else in the dorm. No, he rather stare it down while he’s on the toilet while he tried to think of a better place to put the creepy little thing. Even then he’s got Ori, his roommate, yelling about how he swore he saw the thing move and it lead to nightmares a lot. But oddly enough when he woke, covered in sweat, and his heart hammering in his throat, he was rather easily calmed when he thought of a certain blond. 

When the first nightmare happened, he had some blob like creature with stubby legs and impossibly long thin arms chasing him down a dark hallway with this eerie blue light to only way to see. He actually woke up screaming when he thought the thing caught him. He tried anything to keep himself from jumping at every little sound, every little movement, Ori put on movies on the tiny tv he owned and the two balled up together like scared children until dawn. They both missed classes that day.

The next nightmare was of a beautiful woman, so pretty, out in the forest. She was naked with long, long, red hair that she was brushing while sitting on a rock. She was singing in a language he didn’t know. At first he thought it was Tauriel, but then he saw the pointed ears and wondered why he was dreaming of an elf. Then everything turned dark, twisted. She was brushing her hair but a black tar started slopping onto the ground with each stroke of her brush. It bubbled and popped. White faces with hollow eyes and gaping mouths floated up to the surface. They started moaning and wailing in tune with her song. The tar started to slip down hill towards him. He scuttled backwards, trying to get away from it only to hit into something solid. He looked up to find the elven woman, tall and thin like an ill made doll. Her eyes were hollow, and black, the tar slipping down over the gaping mouth and oozing down onto Kili’s face.

Other nightmares had followed but these two had stayed in his mind, always in the forefront. Always making his eyes dart to the shadows in the corner of the room, keep the lights on when all he wanted to do was curl up and sleep. He tried to think of happier times, times spent with Bard and Tauriel. Times with his mom and dad, but they never helped. Eventually he started to think of a certain pair of blue eyes, the hard earned smile, delicate hair that looked like spun gold. Fili’s soft voice seemed so surreal in his mind, comforting him, talking to him. Sometimes he would imagine Fili telling him to stay strong, to not let it get to him. It fueled him for this long but he was coming to a frayed point to his tether.

He was currently resting his head on his folded arms at his desk, it was well after lectures and he was just waiting for Ori. They were both too scared to be in their dorm alone, even Ori was having nightmares, though he never said what they were, he did look a bit pail when Kili told him of his. Especially that room… that weird room with the small door that looked like a latch for a hay loft. Crawling through to find a hallway behind the wall, going down it…

His eyelids started to draw closed. Breath shortening.

He was so tired.

There was a strange groan and Kili blinked awake. His heart stilled. 

He was in a room that was a hazy blue color. Elegant, blue and white, wallpaper that sat on top of white paneling. His eyes fixed on the loft door. He pulled on the sleeves of his gray hoodie, not wanting to move. He didn’t want to move at all. There was something wrong with all of this, something twisted and dark behind the mask of comfort.

He took one step, then another.

“No.” His mind moaned. 

He was going onto his knees, fingers coming up to the latch. His dream body not listening to his own will. He tried to struggle for control as he opened the door, crawling through to get to the hallway behind the wall. It was like the room before, blue and white with paneling. There were paintings on the walls all set in different shapes of frames. He couldn’t get himself to turn his head enough to look at any of them, he couldn’t even move his eyes. He was just walking down that hazy hallway, feeling as if he was wading through fog.

“I don’t want to be here… I don’t want to go there!!” He shouted in his mind.

The hallway came to an end, a silver ladder laid against the wall. He grabbed the rungs and started to climb up. Each pull, each step, it took him closer to the darkness above his head. His heart started to pick up pace as the darkness consumed him and yet up he climbed. He felt his will power stutter and pull in as he pulled himself up onto a landing then started up stairs. He knew what was next. It was the room where he never looked out the windows, then it was down… down… down… to that place… He didn’t want to go there. He didn’t.

“Fili.” He felt himself curl up inside that darkness, hands clutching his head in his fear. He didn’t want to go to that place, not there, anywhere but there. “Fili… p-please, Fili.”

His shoulder was shook, wrenching him from the dream. He jerked back, his forearm hitting into the chest of the person who woke him. He blinked, frowning, as his eyes focused on the redhead in front of him. Ori’s face drawn in dark lines of exhaustion and concern. It was a few seconds later that he realized there was a sound in the room. Something that sounded like an electric guitar being strummed. It wasn’t until it stopped that he realized it was his cell phone.

He had slept through that? But it was so loud.

“You wouldn’t wake…” Ori said softly, hand not leaving Kili’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I…” What does one say to that? He licked his lips, moving his arm, patting his friend on the chest as if to make sure he was real and he wasn’t still in some twisted nightmare. “...I… sorry… for that.”

Ori didn’t say anything, just looked at him as if to say, _I understand. Last night you had to wake me up from screaming in my sleep._

The cell phone rang again. This time Kili moved fully to pull his phone out, he looked at the name flashing across the screen as it rung and rung. There… was no way. He stared at it until it stopped, his heart skipping a beat as he scrambled. He should have answered it! He had to answer it! He had to hear that voice, he had to-

It rung again and instantly he answered. He held it up to his ear, listening to a long breath being pushed out. He closed his eyes. Why did just hearing him breath give him such relief?

“Hey…. dimples…”

Kili visibly shook. Ori sat down on the desk next to the one Kili was at, watching his friend put his thumb into his mouth for his teeth to dig away at the skin around his nail. “H-hey. Sorry to have, uh, to not have called you or gotten online…”

“You’re coming over for the weekend.”

Then Fili hung up. Kili gripped his phone in a white knuckled grip. Something black inside twisted up into his stomach. “No… no, no!” He was dialing back Fili’s number. He rocked a bit as he listened to it ring and ring. He tucked his free hand under his other, holding himself tight.

“Hello?”

“You don’t get to hang up on me like that!” He snapped, feeling as if black tar was falling from his mouth. 

“Kili.” Fili’s voice was so soothing. “Don’t go to your room, go to your car. Come over.”

“But I-”

“Bring your friend, come home. I’ll see you in three hours.”

Kili swallowed as he hung up. Bring his friend?

He looked over at Ori who looked just as bad as Kili felt. And yet again, it entered his mind, just what was Fili?


	8. Chapter 8

Kili rubbed at his eyes as he waited in line at the gas station. He was so tired and his heart kept giving an extra hard thump any time he thought about going to sleep. He was scared, he realized this only when he found himself nodding off while driving. He was terrified to go to sleep and now he was purchasing coffee with as much sugar and caffeine he could put into it as well as an energy drink that he had already opened and started to guzzle like a man dying of thirst. If Ori was as bad as he was then the redhead was really good at hiding it. 

He grabbed a handful of cheap honey roasted peanut packets and slapped them down on the counter along with a wad of money, “The rest on pump eight.”

He snatched everything up rather clumsily, some of the peanut packets falling to the floor that he had almost spilled his coffee over when reaching down to grab them. He was dazed when standing up fully, the lack of rest starting to take a toll on his body. It would be a few minutes before the energy drink would start to work. In the mean time he had to deal with traveling. He came out of the gas station, having to dodge a car that didn’t want to stop for a pedestrian. He sighed when he put his coffee on the hood of his car and set to work to put gas in the vehicle. He looked inside seeing Ori leaned back in his seat, sleeping away as he had been when Kili first stopped. At least he was sleeping. That was good. 

“Hey! In your car not on the ground!!” Someone shouted.

Kili’s attention snapped over to the gas pump that he had been squeezing, gasoline had managed to soak into his pant leg and onto the ground. He shook his head and shoved it into the gas tank. He had been positive that he had put it in properly.

He grabbed his coffee, drinking it as quickly as he could, feeling the burning sensation in his mouth and throat from the hot drink start to wake up his senses. He pulled the paper cup away from his mouth trying hard not to retch as the burning sensation intensified. 

“Ffffffuck!” He shouted, making him grab his throat as he winced in pain. He wanted to keep himself awake, now he hurt so bad that he was certain he couldn’t sleep even if he tried.

The shout woke up Ori, the loud thudding from inside was from his thrashing from being startled awake. 

The gas pump stopped and Kili made sure to double check to make sure he put the gas cap back on. Then he got into the car only to get back out and triple check before he felt comfortable enough to continue driving. 

“What the hell is that smell?” Ori asked as he rolled down his window with one hand, the other covering his mouth with his sleeve.

“Spilled gas on me.” Kili rolled down the rest of the windows with his controls. His throat hurting with every word. “Fuck, it’s getting dark already?”

“It’s eight pm according to your clock, and it’s spring.” Ori pressed his head into the wind of the open window to get some relief from the fumes.

“Eight? But we left at two… I’ve only been on the road for an hour and a half.”

“So?”

“So where the hell did the other four and a half hours go, Ori?!”

“Don’t yell at me because you fell asleep at the gas station!”

“I didn’t!” Did he? “What the fuck ever, I need you to stay awake to keep me awake so we can get there.”

“Where are we going anyway? You just threw me in the car and started driving.”

“We’re going to a friend’s house.”

“I know that our dorm was getting uncomfortable but a five and a half hour drive to get to a friend’s place to sleep? Couldn’t we just go to Dwalin’s?”

“I wouldn’t sleep over at Dwalin’s even if someone paid me.” Kili kept his eyes on the road, his headlights turned on. Odd little flickers started to go in front of his vision, small black things that slithered along the road leaving behind tarred patches. His mind told him that they had always been there, he had seen the bad patch jobs of the cracks in this county compared to the one his school was in. He had seen them for many years, now his eyes were telling him that before his headlights there was nothing but old, grey, asphalt, then on the edge of the light coming from his car were these black, sluggish looking creatures. Shiny and quick, flowing along leaving behind the tar trails. 

“And why wouldn’t you stay at Dwalin’s he’s a perfectly nice guy… now that he’s cleaned up.”

“It’s not Dwalin I have a problem with. It’s his fucking roommates that keep trying to get him hooked again.”

“No, he’s moved. Got a job at a body parts store and everything.”

“And you know this because?” He rolled his wrist to show that he wanted Ori to elaborate, while his fingers flicked on the windshield wipers. Small drops of rain started drumming down on them the closer they got to town.

“Because I see him from time to time, like you do anyone that lives in town.” Ori rubbed at an eye. “You don’t have to fuck every friend you have, you know.”

“Yes, because you and I have a long history of being bed buddies.” Kili said sarcastically.

“I meant in general! It seems to be the way of common thinking now… why? Did you want to have sex with me?”

Kili burst out laughing. “Christ, Ori! You’re so fucking weird.”

“Knew that would get you smiling again.” Ori sighed heavily. “I must be more tired than I thought.”

“Why do you say that, O Master of the Baggy Eyed Look?”

“Because I’m seeing weird slug things on the road.”

Kili felt a lump in his throat as his grip tightened on the steering wheel. That was possibly the last thing he needed to hear. He swallowed only to have thick saliva come back up making him want to spit. He changed the subject, talking about anything that he could think of that wasn’t creepy which landed him with Ori nodding off once more and his own mouth sealed shut with nothing left to say. Luckily it had made the time pass and soon he was slowing down past the McDonalds and the old granary into Chewelah. He slowed to a stop in the middle of the sleepy town, everyone already turned in for the night. Standing on the sidewalk, not far to the entrance of town stood two blonds, dressed in black coats sharing one red and white umbrella.

“What the hell are they doing out here?” He murmured, Ori waking a bit from the stop. He leaned out his window, “What are you guys doing?”

Frerin pointed easily to a parking lot not far. “Go park, you’re walking us home.”

Kili blinked at them a few times before Frerin pointed again showing he wasn’t going to have it any other way. He frowned before doing what was instructed, rolling up the windows to his already wet car and getting out, encouraging Ori to come as well.

“I don’t get it, why are we walking?” Ori asked.

Kili shrugged. “They’re weird that way I guess.”

He pulled up the hood to his hoodie before trotting across the street, Ori following. He couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face as he came closer, it only faltered because of how grim the two looked. He had a sinking feeling, doubt boiling up in his stomach as he wondered if he should have even come at all. He tried to say Fili’s name but the blond only turned with Frerin, the two acting as one as they walked in step.

“Are they like, twins or something?” Ori asked as he followed behind them alongside Kili.

“No. I was surprised to find out they’re not related.”

“Huh.” Ori hugged himself in a feeble attempt to get warm.

“Just ‘huh’?”

“Well, I’ve certainly read about stranger things since I’m studying psychology.”

“Which you’re pretty bad at.”

“I am n…” Ori sighed. Who was he kidding, he was terrible at it, he only was taking the course because his mother wanted him to. “Yeah, I’m terrible at it. I rather major in history.”


	9. Chapter 9

Fili and Frerin didn’t talk much, Fili didn’t say a word at all, only talking was done by Frerin. They brought Ori and Kili in, gave them a change of clothing, let them bathe, fed them a small dinner and then they were tucked, side by side in a soft, large bed. Ori had fallen to sleep almost instantly, a deep slumber where his body was loose and limp, his mouth open as he snored loudly. He was splayed like a rag doll, practically shoving Kili off of the bed. Kili didn’t mind though. He was still awake despite how tired and comfortable he was. He couldn’t stop thinking of Fili. How he didn’t say a word… not a single word. He didn’t even look at him. Why didn’t he look at him?!

They were friends right? He was tucked into possibly the most comfortable bed he had ever been on. Wearing some of Fili’s clothing, belly happy with Frerin’s cooking… it all screamed, friendship. So why the hell wasn’t Fili… 

Kili sighed as he was kicked once more by Ori. He finally decided to get up out of bed. Maybe he could lay on the couch for a while. He sighed heavily shoving Ori over so that he could free his pillow that was stolen. It didn’t work, he gave up the fight to venture out into the front room. 

The house was dark save for a small light down the hallway in the kitchen for when someone wants to have a late night drink of water. It was so quiet that he could hear the drumming of the rain on the roof of the single story home. He closed his eyes, enjoying the sound. It had been a very long time since he had heard it like this. Safe and comfortable, warm and… loved, it did bother him that Fili didn’t look at him but his actions spoke louder than ever. He was trying to make Kili feel safe enough he can sleep. Be a good friend.

He would have to thank him, in the morning he’ll ask if he could make him breakfast or something corny like that.

He smiled to himself, picking up his feet and venturing into the front room where he stopped. Precious little light was coming in from outside, bathing the room in tones of greys. The drizzle of the rain slipping down the window cast long shadows over the floor and by the window was Fili, standing there shirtless, looking out with a mug in his hand. Whatever was in the mug was warm enough to steam up against the glass as the blond looked one way then the next in a slow movement. He shifted his weight from both feet over to one as he brought the mug up to his lips and gave a gentle sip. Kili felt something stir inside of him.

“You should be asleep.” Fili said so softly that if it wasn’t for Kili’s need to hear his voice he wouldn’t have heard him at all.

“Ori’s evicted me from the bed.” He said smoothly even though his insides were dancing with joy. He came up to Fili, looking him up and down, seeing the contours of his body. Strong muscles, a band of symbols wrapped around his left bicep. 

Fili made a noncommutative grunt, his lips going to his mug and pulling another swallow of what smelled like sweetened coffee. The small movement of his lips, the way his beard and mustache emphasized the movement of his jaw and cheeks. Those impossibly blue eyes flickering over to him.

_Kili took hold of the cup, his other hand coming up to grab the back of Fili’s neck. He crashed their mouths together, forcing his tongue inside the blond’s mouth, forcing a whimper to escape._

“What?” Kili shook his head. His mind flashing from the odd vision he just had. 

“I asked if you would like to sleep in my bed.” Fili stated flatly.

“I, um,” God, now he was staring at those lips, how Fili slowly licked them. 

“I’m not sleeping tonight.” Fili’s voice seemed to brush over him like a gentle hand stroking down a cat’s back. “Go to my room, get some rest. It’s the third door down the hall.”

“Are you sure?” Kili pinched the bridge of his nose.

_“Trust me.” Fili pressed up flush against Kili, his hot mouth going to Kili’s neck making him moan. He grabbed Fili’s shoulders, pressing up against him, letting him move a leg between his._

A hot hand grabbed his wrist, anchoring him from whatever illusion he was imagining. He was pulled down the hallway, Fili stopping only by the coffee table to put down his cup. Fili opened the door to his room, the soft creaking of another door brought their attention to the guest room. Frerin coming out carrying a clear bowl that held something thick and black. 

“What’s that?” Kili asked.

“Go to sleep, Kili.” Frerin smiled softly as he walked by. Whatever was in the bowl smelled putrid and rotten. It made him silently gag.

Fili went to his bed, pulling back the covers and motioning Kili to climb in.

“Not going to come in with me?” He teased.

The blond regarded him briefly before sitting down in a chair that was in front of a computer desk. “I’ll remain until you fall asleep.”

“I was… just joking. You don’t have to stay.” Kili felt his cheeks burn as he rolled onto his side, the bed and sheets smelling of fresh linen and something purely Fili.

Fili didn’t say anything, just watched as Kili’s eyes started to drift close. He waited for well over an hour, watching the brunet’s chest rise and fall in his slumber. He got up from his seat, coming over to the bed. He took the blankets and slowly tugged, inch by inch they slid off of Kili’s body.

It was time for him to set to work. 

Frerin waited in the kitchen, he was a patient person, he wasn’t always this way. He once was a short tempered beast, nothing but howling screams and violent tendencies. Then Fili came into his life, forcing himself to calm, to learn quickly what mistakes could be made and what he could not risk. It was through these actions that he had the luck of meeting Thorin one silent night, as he huddled and held tightly onto the shivering form of a boy barely a teenager. 

_“Don’t you come a step closer!!” Frerin shouted, panting, out of breath from running so far and long from his pursuer. He stepped back, removing the boy from his arms and around to keep him behind him._

_“Frerin,” Fili’s voice shook as badly as his body did._

_“Stay behind me,” Frerin hissed. “If he comes at me you run.”_

_“No.”_

_The dark figure moved, reaching into his long coat, pulling something out. Suddenly a flicker of light and Frerin could see the man’s face as he lit a cigarette. Bearded with a sharp nose, grim lines around his face._

_The zippo lighter went out with a flick of the wrist. “I’m not here to kill you.” The man took a deep breath of his cigarette before letting it out slowly._

_Frerin glared at him, carefully stepping farther back, down the road. He wasn’t going to play this game, he had to keep his guard up._

_“Here.” The man backed away, stepping under a street light so Frerin could see him fully. He shrugged off his leather coat, dropping it to the ground showing the holsters of vials, guns, and carved wooden stakes. He held up his hands and did a little circle showing everything he had on him. “See, everything out in the open.”_

_“If you’re not going to kill us… then what are you going to do?”_

_“Figure you out.” The man took his cigarette between two fingers and pointed those fingers at Frerin. “I’ve been watching. I know what you are, but I’m not sure how you can be the way you are.”_

_“Y-you know?” Ice cold dread filled Frerin’s heart. His instincts told him to turn, grab Fili and run. “How many have you told?!”_

_“No one.” He took a drag from his cigarette, his other hand running through short hair. Fingers flexing in a way that showed he was used to having longer hair. “Far as I can gather, we three are the ones that know, after you killed that Hound two weeks ago. Well done, I might add, if I wasn’t more experienced than I would have thought it to be an accident just like everyone else.”_

_His lips curled in a snarl. “That bitch left me no choice.”_

_“I know. Like I said, I’ve been watching you for a while. Trying to understand your habits,” he motioned behind Frerin. “Been protecting this one since you adopted him three years ago, from your bond I would say you’ve known each other longer than that. But what I would like to know is why your hair turned golden when you had black hair.”_

_“Bleach.”_

_He threw back his head and laughed. “Oh, no, not you.” He hummed softly, tilting his head to the side. “Hmm… not you.”_

_“Who the hell are you? You’ve been trailing us for a while and haven’t attacked. So what kind of Hound are you?”_

_“Thorin,” he nodded his head in a slight bow. “And I’m not a Hound. I’m something much more rare, almost as rare as you.”_

_Fili moved behind Frerin, pulling on him. The blond man swallowed as a new set of fear cut into his bones. He had never seen one, only heard legends. Humans misconstrued the idea of what they were, telling tales of men and women who hunt monsters that prowled the night. They called them Hunters, with their skills and heroic deeds, but the rest of them, the ones that were in that convoluted part of the world called them Hounds. They hunted down their prey with dogged determination, never giving up, running the creatures down before biting into them. They traveled with more than one making a pack and it was hard to kill one without the rest of them finding out who did it. These people were not Hunters. Hunters were much more dangerous. They were much more intelligent, most monsters that were killed by a Hunter had no idea what had happened before it was too late. And yet here was one in front of him, any direction could be the trap laid for him and Fili. He was trapped even though he was out in the open._

Fili came out of his room, coming into the kitchen, getting a large bowl. He went back into his room, it was about a half hour later he came back out, the bowl filled with the same substance in the bowl that sat on the counter next to Frerin’s elbow. 

“He had a lot in him.” Fili sighed, looking tired. 

“Did you get all of it out?”

The younger nodded.

“We’ll keep it outside until we can see Bilbo tomorrow.”

They moved quietly to the back door, finding a cluster of trees that they put the bowls under. Frerin straightened out, looking up at the sky. “You should keep it raining until then.”

“It’s hard to do it.” Fili rubbed at his face, slicking his skin and beard with rain.

“Do you need a little?” Frerin shook his wrist.

Fili nodded.


	10. Chapter 10

Thorin pushed the papers across the table towards the general. He leaned forward resting on his knuckles against the polished wooden desk.

“I don’t think you understand.” He said simply. “I need to get home. I have been patient, waiting for years now in order to get my transfer and you have denied me at every turn. You either transfer me or accept my letter of resignation.”

The blond looked at him with bored eyes. He glanced down to the paper before turning his nose slowly up into the air, “If I accept your resignation then it’ll lead to a dishonorable discharge, as you well know, and we need you here.”

Thorin felt the pull of anger prickling at the skin of the back of his neck. “You do not need me here. You have Balin and Bofur who are the same rank as I and overly qualified to do exactly the same job. So I’ll say it one more time, transfer me within the week or accept my letter of resignation, Thranduil.”

“I will do neither.”

The Hunter pulled back from the desk, straightening his back and folding his arms over his chest. “Then you leave me little choice than to remove you from office.”

The other snorted, “As if someone like you could.”

“Everyone has their secrets, secrets that people in power should never know.” Thorin’s eyes narrowed into a hard glare. “It would be a long investigation, but your removal from office would be quick. My hard work here already placed me as runner up for your position. Either way, I _will_ be going home soon. It’s up to you on how this is conducted.”

Ice blue eyes glared. “You’re bluffing, you don’t know anything about me.”

Thorin felt the corner of his mouth pull into a smirk. One word, it would only take one word. “Imladris.”

\-----------------------------

The sun was warm, spilling down upon the earth like a warm blanket, washing over his head and back. He had woken late in the day to an empty house, a note from Frerin said he was out with Fili until dark and there was a text sent to him from Ori that his friend had felt refreshed enough to explore the small town. Kili had honestly wanted to tuck himself back under the sheets of the Fili’s bed and go right back to sleep if it wasn’t for the fact that he found himself hardening from the scent of the blond. He tried taking a shower, just to get his mind off of blue eyes and his own perverted imaginings. But his hand wandered down over his thighs, his mind imagining it was Fili’s hands touch, ghosting over his skin. He bit his lip, the water running over his back, almost positive that he could feel the solid body of the blond pressed up against him. Burning wet kisses played against his shoulders, mouth working up to this neck where he was bit lightly. A hand went to his cock, taking hold of the girth and stroking it gently.

Kili had to place a hand on the shower stall wall, leaning forward as he worked himself. He panted out Fili’s name as he bucked into his hand wanting so badly to feel something more on his skin than an illusion as he crested into his orgasim. 

Now he was fully dressed, hair damp as he walked through the woods that boarded one of the many fields that took up the countryside. He picked at the label on his half filled water bottle as his mind sloshed around the thoughts in his head. He didn’t understand it. He’s had several girlfriends in the past, always looked at girls, loved their curves and their lips. It was disturbing to him over how much he wanted to touch Fili, last night had been the first time he ever thought about kissing the blond and now… now he was masterbating to his visage? What was wrong with him? He was straight. Or at least he thought he was. Did liking one guy make him gay? Or Bi? It wasn’t like he looked at Frerin or Bard like he did Fili. 

He sighed heavily kicking an old pinecone, watching it scuttle across the forest floor. He trudged forward with a feeling as if his feet were shackled to the ground. He felt terrible about thinking of Fili like that. He was his friend, he didn’t deserve to be thought of as nothing more than something to bang… but was that it? Was that what he really wanted? To just have sex with him and then drop him like he was a one night stand?

Kili’s path took him into a field. Dark eyes scanned the open area before catching on the sight of two familiar blond heads. They were across the field, crouched down and moving as if working on something. He tilted his head as he remembered Bard’s words about them being rarely seen and most of that time it was in the fields. His curious nature pulled at him, nagging him to get closer. He wanted to know what they were doing.

It took him a few minutes, as he didn’t see the point in running, but he started to get within earshot of them. The closer he got more was revealed to him, there was a third person, huddled with them, hair a light brown with a kiss of red and yellow. This new person was instructing by the tone of his voice, though Kili couldn’t make out the words.

The first thing he heard was the sharp bite of Fili’s usually calm voice saying, “I’m trying!”

“Don’t get angry, stay calm.” The instructor said. “Concentrate, cut it apart, yes, like that. Now add the water.”

Kili stopped walking in favor to watch. He could see now, there were bowls in the middle of their small circle, an odd looking knife sticking out of one that was filled with a thick blackness. Fili bit the cork to a blue bottle, giving a yank, pulling the cork free with a pop. He poured water into the liquid, slowly. As the water fell onto the black substance the knife started to slip down, the black thinning into grey before turning clear.

Frerin gave a proud laugh, slapping Fili on the shoulder. “You did it!”

The blond spat the cork into his free hand, visibly shaking as he let out a long shuddering breath. A stressed chuckle fell from his lips as he smiled. 

“See? It’s not as hard as it looks.” The other said with a reassuring smile.

“It’s a lot harder than it looks, Bilbo.” Fili regarded the other with a level of fondness that pulled at Kili’s heart, making it sink into his stomach.

“You say that now but wait until you do it again, you’ll find it to be easier.”

Fili reached over, grabbing the strange knife. He took in a deep breath, “Right… last part.”

Whatever was in the bowl bubbled up, popping like air passing through molasses. Something that looked remarkably similar to the things he had seen on the road, slithered over the edge of the bowl. 

“One’s getting out!” Frerin yelled.

“Get water on it!” Bilbo shouted.

It was fast, lightening quick. Kili felt his heart leap from his stomach up to his throat as he saw the flicker of black slip along the mixture of dead and new grass. It was headed straight for him.

He twisted the lid to his water bottle and sloshed it down as it came closer. The water hitting it slowed it down. There was a scrambling sound and suddenly a knife was piercing through it, digging in deep into the earth. It didn’t kill the thing, whatever it was. It wiggled around in violent jerks as it was pinned under Fili’s knife.

Fili, on his knees, one hand still holding the hilt to his blade, the other braced on the ground, looked up at Kili with wide eyes. He swallowed slowly as Kili stood there, staring.

He didn’t say anything, only waited for Kili to say something. Fear evident on his face.

“What… the _hhhhell_ is that?” Kili asked, shaking his empty water bottle at the creature.

“Kili, you have to leave.” Frerin grabbed him by his upper arm, pulling him along as if he was a naughty child.

“But- What-”

“You have to go, now.” He didn’t stop walking at his fast pace. “We’ll talk later, go back home and wait for us.”

“But- Fili-”

“Will be fine. Now get!” Frerin shoved Kili, making him stumble into the woods. He pointed in the direction to the house. “Go, now.”


	11. Chapter 11

Kili didn’t know what was going on, but when Frerin yelled at him something about it all seemed to click his fight or flight response. Frerin’s angry was hot, as if it could physically burn him, the black slug creature, Fili’s own fear, it all boiled together in a mess that sent his heart beating like a hunted rabbit’s. He did as he was told, and ran back to the house. He careened into Ori who was trying to open the door, a few shopping bags hanging from his wrist.

“Kili, what the hell?!” Ori hissed as he rubbed his shoulder.

Kili looked over towards the woods. His hands drummed on Ori’s back as he hoped in place. “In, in. Now!”

“Alright, alright. Christ, Kili.” Ori opened the door and was shoved inside. The brunet closed the door behind him, locking it. “What the hell?! What’s wrong with you?”

In reply he got a wide eyed look and an innocent shake of the head. “Nothing.”

“Right.” Ori eyed him, knowing he wasn’t going to get anything else from his friend. He moved around him and into the front room, depositing his sacks on the sofa and flopping down on a cushion. “So what were you doing out?”

“Walk.” Kili said, tight lipped as he paced around to the windows. He wasn’t even sure what he was looking for, maybe more of those black things? “You?”

“Explored this town, everything is centered on two streets. Rather interesting. Couldn’t find anything to buy really besides stuff for dinner, which I should probably put in the fridge and not let it sit on the couch.” He grunted as he got up. “Think Frerin and Fili would mind if I cooked tonight?”

“Yeah, I mean, no. I don’t know.”

“You sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine. Just jumpy, no sleep, all that.” Kili didn’t look at Ori as he ventured into house. He felt scared still. He didn’t even know why. It was just a black slug, and… and…

He shoved himself into Fili’s bedroom. Something about Frerin’s anger terrified him. It scared him down to his core. He felt as if Frerin was really going to hurt him, as if he had the power to make him completely disappear.

He pressed his back against the wall, sliding down to the floor. He kept his knees tightly to his chest as he tried to figure out why he was terrified. Frerin was nothing but smiles, warmth, and laughter. This wasn’t normal.

 

It was several hours when Kili finally uncurled himself. He laid on the floor staring up at the ceiling as his joints ached from being stiff. He was acting like a little kid. He was an adult. Frerin wasn’t someone to be scared of, all he needed to do was talk to him, understand why he had been furious. Then he would ask Fili what the slug thing was, and why it came out of a bowl of tar. Simple. And he was certain he would get a logical answer. Things were always simpler than they seemed. 

The bedroom door slammed open, startling him up into a sitting position. Fili stormed in. He kicked the door shut, looking a mixture of scared and angry. 

“Uh, you okay?” Kili asked slowly.

Fili didn’t say anything, as he stomped around in a tight circle. His hands twitching as if he wasn’t sure what to do. He looked at Kili, pointedly as if the college student could read his mind.

“Look, I’m sorry… whatever happened in the field…” He felt his mouth go dry as he watched Fili start to strip off his clothing. He swallowed, staring at the well toned body, trying to rest his eyes on the cock that was thick and standing at attention. “I… uh…”

Fili came over to him, grabbing at his shirt and tearing at the fabric as he lowered himself onto his knees between Kili’s spread legs. Kili yelped in protest but when he felt the heaviness of Fili’s cock against the groin of his jeans he couldn’t help but moan. Impossibly hot lips pressed over his collarbone, as fingers worked on his button and zipper. 

Kili eagerly moved, removing his boxers and jeans. He grabbed Fili’s neck, yanking him down to a wet kiss. It was sloppy and needy, fueled by a lust that was steadily burning hotter with each touch. He let out a shuddering breath of relief when Fili’s cock rubbed against his. His fingers tangled in a mess of golden hair, breath hitching from the other rutting with him as he matched thrust for thrust. 

It felt so good. 

It felt perfect.

There was a loud banging sound, jerking Kili into awareness. He blinked around the dark room, finding himself alone. A stillness permeated the silence. He released a breath he didn’t even know he had been holding. 

He put both hands on his face realizing he had dreamed of having sex with Fili. A full blown, his pants felt very need of changing now, wet dream of Fili. What was worse was that he was still hard. Damn hard. This was a problem in more ways than one. It was getting so vivid that he wasn’t sure what was real or what wasn’t…

“Damn it.” He growled under his breath.

“Damn what?”

Kili started, afraid to move his hands.

Slowly, he peeked around his fingers finding no one there. Swallowing he glanced around once more. “Uh, hello?”

“Try sitting up, dimples.”

Kili did as he was told, finding Fili sitting on his bed, back against the wall. He looked tired as he stared out the window. It was raining again, not heavy, only enough to cause rivets to trail down the glass. Kili tried to get up but his straining boner made decided for him that he shouldn’t, instead he pulled his legs under him and folded his arms over the edge of the bed. Looking up at Fili.

“H-how long have you been there?” He silently begged that Fili had not watched him writhe on the floor and come in his pants.

Fili shrugged his shoulder slowly.

Silence stretched between them, the blond staring out the window, the student trying to will his cock from throbbing. What the hell was wrong with him?

“Frerin’s upset.” Fili whispered. “He wants to move.”

Kili felt his heart stop. Move… it wouldn’t be so terrible of an idea if it wasn’t the fact that the blond looked like he was barely keeping himself together. In this modern world, keeping in contact was easy, but something told him that all of it would be dropped. “Move? W-why would you move?”

Fili’s nose pulled up in a sniffling motion even though he didn’t make the sound. His hand came up and brushed at his hair, getting it out of his face. 

“Fili, why would you move?” He asked in a harder tone. Pushing himself up, he climbed onto the bed, coming over to his friend. “Fili.”

He wouldn’t look at Kili. Kili touched his cheek, guiding his face with a gentle tug. He didn’t notice that they were so close together until their breath mingled and pulled for attention to be placed on the lips.

“Why would you leave, Fili?” He licked his lips, trying so hard not to kiss the other.

Fili’s voice was barely there, he moved a little, a few fingers came up. Gently touching at Kili’s clothing. “Because you pose a threat.”

“I would never hurt you. I promise.”

Fili was still moving, Kili going with him to keep the closeness. He had been trying to move away, trying to get some distance between them. He had been fantasizing about the brunet for much too long. Of pushing him down, kissing his back, sucking on his cock. He’s dreamed of biting into his neck while being in the throes of sexual bliss. Tasting the blood, feeding. It wasn’t natural. He was confused, going insane with a need he couldn’t possibly be feeling. 

“Kili…” he whispered it as if the name was a prayer within itself. His mouth hung open as he looked at those lips. He wanted to taste them. His head bobbed with a hesitant movement. “I…”

Kili moved a little bit more, the top of his thigh brushed against his groin causing Fili to gasp. He pushed at Kili, forcing him to sit up and put some space between them. He scooted back as best as he could, panting with need. He wasn’t surprised to see Kili’s wide eyes. He had been startled of Kili’s own attraction when he had come in finding Kili in the midst of a sex dream while moaning Fili’s name. It only made it all the harder to accept.

“I, uh, I…” Kili fidgeted. 

Fili put a finger to his lips trying to think, trying to understand. His brow knitting as he thought back to the girl buried in the earth. If he was having this reaction with Kili… no, it had to be a mistake.

“Okay, so I’ve dreaming about kissing you since I saw you again. But the first time I saw you I couldn’t stop thinking about your eyes, because you’re eyes are something else and I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me because I’m not gay but I like you, but I like girls. I mean, I love their curves and their wetness and the sounds they make when you hit just the right spot. And I just realized you probably don’t want to hear that, but back to the main point, I’ve been thinking of you in the most inappropriate ways and you’re like a really great friend and I’m sorry that I nearly forced myself on you just now and that I’ve been having wet dreams about you-”

“Dimples.”

“Yes?” Kili huffed out a breath, knowing he was going to get rejected.

“Cut yourself.”

“What?” That was definitely not what he had expected. 

“Prick your finger or something. I need your blood.”

“Fuck no. I’m not doing that.”

“You don’t understand.” Fili got up off of the bed. He rummaged through his desk finding a push pin. “I need to make sure.”

“To make sure I have blood? I can assure you that I do. Hey!!” Fili grabbed his hand, pulling hard. He jabbed the pin into the pad of his middle finger. “OW! Fuck, Fili, what the hell?!”

Fili didn’t say anything only placed a knee back on the bed. He flipped his head, sending his hair curtaining to one side so it couldn’t obstruct his view of the droplet of blood. He stuck the finger into his mouth, soothing the blood over his tongue. It sparked something inside, it made any part it touch tingle as if he had eaten crackling candy. The taste, it couldn’t be described, nor the tethering pull he felt, as he sucked softly at the digit. He started to bob his head, trying to milk the finger for more blood, a whine escaping his throat.

Kili watched with mixed interest at what Fili was doing. His throat felt as if it was coated in something thick, any word or sound that wanted to come out was stopped. When Fili whined he pulled his finger free from that lovely heat.

“Why did- why did you do that?” He asked as Fili sat over one of his legs, he could see the bulge in Fili’s pants. He wanted to cup it with his palm so badly.

“I’ve never tasted anything like that.” Fili panted, trying hard to keep himself in check and he was failing… badly. His head felt so muddled now, something screaming deep down inside of him. He rubbed at his face as he rocked his hips against Kili’s leg trying to relieve some of the pressure building inside of him. “Needed to… Needed to… make sure.”

Kili shifted, hands going to Fili’s hips as he pulled him to fully settle between his legs. He physically shook from his desire to buck up against Fili. He wanted to kiss him, pin him down, ravage his body. But this was Fili. Beautiful Fili.

“Make sure of what?”

The blond made a desperate sound, he was already working off his shirt, pulling it up and over his head. “That I need you.” He grabbed at Kili’s shirt, pulling it up. “I need you to breathe. Please,” He tossed the shirt to the side. He pressed himself up against Kili’s chest, shuddering at the contact. It felt so good. It relieved some of the burning that was starting to boil under his skin. “Please.” He didn’t kiss, but brushed his lips up against Kili’s jaw as he begged. “Let me breathe.”

Kili’s mouth claimed his, tongue gaining easy access between lips. Fili’s tongue greeted his, pushing in a licking motion before sliding up and over, slotting their mouths perfectly together. His fingers ghosted over ribs, sliding down and back to slip under the hem of Fili’s pants. He traced his fingertips over the band of his underwear. He gave it a playful pull, snapping it against skin.

He pulled back from the kiss when his antic pulled a growl out of the young man between his legs. When he wasn’t told off, but had his neck jaw kissed, tried something else. His nails dug into skin, scraping hard enough to create little welts. As a result his neck was bit. He hissed, feeling the throb of having the skin broken. He relaxed with a sighing breath as Fili lapped apologetically over the spot.

“Fffuck, Fili.” He pulled at Fili’s hips, pushing their groins together at a dry rub. 

“I want you.” Fili’s voice was a delicious purr. His palm slid down Kili’s chest, resting over his heart as he felt the rise and fall with each panting breath. He could feel the hammering heart underneath, practically hear the rushing of blood. “I want to be with you.”

Kili’s face burst into a grin. He used a surprising amount of strength, grabbing Fili and throwing him onto his back. He worked off Fili’s pants and underwear, quickly shedding his own to the floor. His cock had some smears of white on it from his wet dream. He slowly racked his eyes over that beautifully built body. He looked as if he had been kissed by the sun in every spot on his body. He moved between Fili’s legs, palms running over inner thighs. He pressed his thumbs on either side of the nest of blond that a strained cock jutted out of. He rubbed gentle circles earning an appreciative moan. 

He was nervous. He never had sex with a man before, but he knew what he liked and he had seen a great deal of porn. He knew where to place his own manhood, knew how to prepare for anal. But he was still nervous. He swallowed, looking at that impressive girth before his eyes. He did consider the fact that he may want that in him. His cock twitched at the thought. He had heard it was very good.

He gave an experimental lick. He judged the texture of the new skin against his tongue, dragging it up the bumps of veins to tease at the underside of the round tip. The tip was a great contrast in texture to the shaft. Velvety smooth and a little fun to lap at, especially after the noises it caused Fili to give out. He ventured a little more bravely and slipped the tip of the cock into his mouth pushing it against the roof of his mouth, so he could rub his tongue against it, careful not to push his teeth down. 

Fili tried to move, buck up into the moist cavern of flesh, his hands going into dark tangle of hair. He moaned loudly, breathing out Kili’s name. Kili moved, pinning down his hips making a defiant noise, he was having too much fun. Then he gave a little suck before he relaxed his jaw enough to take just a bit more of Fili in. He was clumsy at first, drooling down the length of the cock as he tried to figure out how to bob his head. He started to use his lips, lightly scrape his teeth over the length. He was a greedy thing, wanting to drink Fili’s milk. 

Fili panted heavily, staring up at the ceiling, trying so hard not to climax too soon. He tried to concentrate on breathing. The feel of Kili’s hands on his thighs, massaging the intimate area, how his hair tickled against his bare skin. 

“K-Kili, please,” he moaned, pushing and pulling trying to get him off.

He finally came off with a pop, a trail of saliva dripping from his bottom lip. Fili moved to the side, fishing into the drawer of his nightstand. He pulled out a bottle of lube he used when he needed to take care of himself. He was about to hand it to Kili but found himself surprised to find Kili laying on his back, legs spread in a welcoming gesture. 

“You… sure?” He looked between the bottle and Kili.

“This is pretty new to me, having a boyfriend. So I figured I’d go all the way.” He blushed deeply, trying to smile through his embarrassment. 

Boyfriend.

Fili liked the sound of that.

He poured some of the lube onto his fingers and stopped. He held out his hand. “Give me your wrist.”

Kili looked confused before he did as he was told. The lube was placed on his wrist and he realized that Fili was doing an allergy test, to make sure it was safe for him. While they waited for a reaction, Fili’s clean hand smoothed down Kili’s chest, fingers massages as he worked down to Kili’s cock. He took it into hand, rubbing his palm over it. The brunet shuddered, bucking up into that warm touch as fingers played over him in a fanning motion. He had a few ladies do that to him before, but never before did it feel so good. 

“Anything?”

“Wha?”

“Your wrist.” Fili kissed Kili’s lips. “Tingling, burning?”

“N-none.”

Fili kissed him again while he got more lube onto his fingers. With one hand he moved one of Kili’s legs to the side, opening him wider. His other, rubbed lube over the fluttering hole. He massaged the skin around it, teasingly dipping the tip of a finger inside before continuing to relax him.

“Fee,” Kili whined into the kisses. This was feeling better than he was told. 

With the prompting, Fili pushed one finger in giving gentle pulls to one side or the other. Pumping it in and out before slipping another in, taking his time with this one. He worked it gently, first pumping while he kissed down Kili’s throat. He lapped at the bite mark he had made, tempted to bite again for a proper feeding. 

He scissored his fingers, keeping them open for ten second intervals at a time to allow the muscle to get used to the intrusion. It was after several minutes of stretching that a third finger was introduced. Kili whimpered at this one. Not like when Fili scissored slowly.

“T-take it easy, would, ya?”

Apologetic kisses were placed on his face. As the pace was slowed. “I’m sorry. Better?”

Kili let out a sigh and nodded, “Much.”

Fili took his time, trying to remain calm as Kili stroked his back and sucked on his earlobes. With much relief he finally reached the point he could move forward. He sat back on his legs, happy to lube up his cock. He looked down at Kili who was looking at him, lustful eyes, sprawled on the bed with legs open wide.

Fili lined up, pushing into the man under him. He groaned with satisfaction with how easily Kili’s body took his prick. The long amount of preparation was well worth it. Soon as he was buried to the hilt, Kili’s legs snapped around his waist, ankles locking. He gave a little swirl of his hips, feeling out the silken walls as that screaming need inside of him started to subside. That tethering pull was stronger now, making his whole body shiver and prickle. 

It was happening, it really was. That meant…

He looked down at Kili, resting his hands on either side of the brunet’s head. Dark eyes were half lidded, looking up at him with an expression of euphoria. 

He quickly claimed those lips, slipping his tongue against Kili’s as his hips moved back then snapped forward. 

Kili moaned into his mouth, breath huffing through his nose as he clawed at Fili’s back. Fili’s angled thrusts were erratic as if he was digging around, trying to find something. Kili had to sacrifice his full hold on Fili’s waist to push a heel into the mattress, giving him leverage to thrust up against his boyfriend’s. Something so powerfully wonderful hit him, something Fili touched. He pulled away from the kiss, back arching as he shouted in bliss. He couldn’t stop the noises that came from his mouth, not as Fili relentlessly beat into it with each thrust. 

He clawed at Fili’s back and arms. Bit at his shoulders in attempts to keep himself quiet only managing to rial Fili up even more. He felt a sharp pain in his neck, he ignored it as Fili kissed over the spot with an open mouth, tongue sliding against it. Small sucks and laps. It felt good, mixing in with what he was doing to him down below. He wouldn’t be able to hold on much longer. 

“F-Fee.” He whined as he felt the familiar coiling in his loins. He was going to climax and by god he was certain it was going to be the orgamsim of his life. “Fuck Fili~ Fuck me Fili, fuck me good.”

He more of felt the possessive growl than heard it that came from the blond. The way it rumbled and seemed to stake a claim. It helped tip him over the edge, clenching tight and holding onto the man above him for dear life as he choked on a scream. His prick jumping with every spurt of seed that splashed out onto their stomachs and chests. He whined with pleasure as Fili continued his assault for several more thrusts before he felt the odd sensation of the cock inside of him twitch and heat pooled inside as Fili empted into him.

Fili braced himself on shaky limbs, slowly pulling out of Kili’s body. Sweat dripping from the tip of his nose, his hair matted against his skin.

Kili reached up, lazily touching Fili’s face. He smiled sleepily but all Fili could do was stare at him.

What had he done?


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry.

The fur was something he always found interesting about horses. It wasn’t exactly pleasant to the touch nor was it uncomfortable. The mane was always corse to his fingers. The pasture always had that distinct farm smell and as long as he was here, apple in hand, he knew he could gather his thoughts. He had stayed with Kili until he had fallen asleep before he dressed himself and left the house altogether, only stopping to the fridge to pick up a pocketful of apples and carrots. It was in the early hours of morning, it would be a while longer until the sun decided it come up, but with the rain it wouldn’t shine on them. Not today.

He ran his hand over the flat of the horse’s head, his fingers covered in juice and the foam created by the horse’s saliva when it was eating the treats given. 

He had messed up. There was no fixing it, and he didn’t even know how to talk to Kili now. How could he tell him the truth and expect him to not react in a bad way? How could he tell Frerin? Or Thorin? Oh god… Thorin…

He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against the horse’s muzzle.

“Thorin is going to be so angry.” He whispered.

“He’s not the only one.”

Fili felt his heart sink at the sound of his adoptive father. He slowly turned. Frerin was standing a good several paces away, the cold glare he gave made Fili’s whole body feel light. All the warmth, the love, it was gone. It felt like a fissure had opened up underneath him and he was falling.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Frerin’s lips curled back into a snarl. 

“I…” Fili couldn’t look at him. He felt weighted down, growing heavier each second at Frerin’s cold fury. “I tried not to… I-” He squeezed his eyes shut. “I had been thinking about him since he was first here and I couldn’t stop. I tried to stop!” He looked up at the other blond pleadingly, begging for him to understand, to not have the same eyes like all the others. “I tried to stay away from him! I didn’t call him, or go on line to chat with him, I-I tried until I had the dream of seeing him trapped in a dollhouse and I couldn’t leave him like that!!”

Frerin strode up quickly to Fili, the horse, sensing the danger ran away from the barbedwire fence. Fili tried not to curl in on himself as Frerin bared down on him. “I don’t give a **fuck** about you helping him. What you did, was a direct spit in _my face_. After all I have done for you, after all that I sacrificed to keep you safe and you do this!!”

“No! I don’t-”

“The fuck you didn’t!!”

“I didn’t mean to!!” Fili finally gave under the pressure, buckling under it to have his own anger boil up to clash against his father’s. “You think I fucking wanted to put him into that position?! To make him into something that I have no idea what he’ll become?! It’s not lost on me, Frerin! I know what I am and how fucked up I am! You think this is easy?! Knowing that I made the stupid mistake of going after him when I should have ignored the tether.”

“Tether? You connected?!” 

“Yes!!” Fili stepped away stomping around in a tight circle, his hands going to his hair in a frustrated motion.

“How? When?!”

“It-it- something happened, I- something happened and I needed to taste him so I got a push pin and got a drop from his finger and-and the tether happened and then we were having sex and I couldn’t-I couldn’t stop it and I fed and it felt so **_good_**.” He growled out the last part.

Frerin pointed at Fili, he shook his finger as he pressed his lips together, trying hard to keep the beast within bottled up. “You… fucked up, and you fucked up good.”

“I know!... I know.”

“We’re taking him to see Bilbo, maybe he can undo it. Maybe- **Shit**! Fili!” Frerin was screaming now, trying hard not to let this get physical. “How could you do this to me?!”

“I’m sorry!!” Fili screamed back, his throat hurt from the shout. His heart thumping into it making him feel sick as his eye stung. 

“He can’t go back, you know he can’t… And his friend… I could leave him somewhere.”

“You’re not killing Ori!”

“What choice do I have? I’ve done more for you than just killing an innocent person to throw _them_ off of our trail! You do realize that he was in the house when you two hooked up, right? Well guess what that leaves a loose end, my _boy_ , which means it’s an end they can grab hold of to find us, or would you rather piss on everything Thorin has done for us as well?!”

“NO!!” Fili pressed his palms into his eyes as he started to cry. Everything was crashing down around him. He knew Frerin’s words rang true, but he was tired of running, tired of hiding, of hurting people that didn’t deserve it all because he was a stupid kid twenty years ago. 

He shook as he tried to keep in his hitching breath. “C-can’t we just move? Have him forget me.”

“It doesn’t work that way, and you know it.”

“W-we can try. P… please.”

“They’ll use him to find you, or have I not explained how Tethering works enough for you?”

“I don’t want him hurt!!”

“Then you shouldn’t have fucked him and fed.” Frerin hissed. He glared at Fili, his own anger had been fueled by the pain of betrayal. He had kept him safe for so long, took chances no one else would ever do for the golden haired man, and now… now it was all thrown back into his face all because Fili acted on impulse. His heart hurt, and it all was made worse with Fili’s tears. But he couldn’t back down, Fili had to understand how dire the situation was.

“I knew I would die for you some day.” He said with a hard edge to his voice. “I didn’t think it would come sooner than later.”

Fili choked on a sob, he shook his head. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

“Say it to my grave, Fili!” He stepped back, feeling horrible for the words he had dealt. “...say it to my grave.”

He turned and walked away, his fingernails biting into his palms as he heard Fili shout out his name after him, begging him not to go.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In Chapter 10 I said "Dwalin and Bofur" when I meant to say "Balin and Bofur" so I changed that. Just so people know.

When Kili woke up in the morning he felt colder than usual. He had the blanket tucked around him, some time during the night he had dressed in some of Fili’s pajamas. He looked around finding that he really was the only one in the room this time. His boyfriend gone. 

He heaved a sigh, rubbing at the grit at the corner of his eyes. He was really, really cold. Maybe a hot shower would help. 

There was the sound of running water coming from the kitchen, the clanking of dishes. He made a detour in his pathway to the bathroom to see who was up, hoping to find Fili sitting at the kitchen table but the only blond was Frerin. His hair was tied back with a dirty zip tie, he smelled like a mechanic’s pit and looked as dirty as one. The only clean bit on him was his forearms down due to how viciously he was scrubbing at what looked like parts of the stove. Everything else was sparkling clean and polished down to a near reflective surface. He had seen this before, when someone was barely able to keep their temper reigned in. A distraction so they wouldn’t cause a physical fight with someone.

“Are… you okay?” Kili asked, edging in.

“Okay?” Frerin shot him a glare, he balked when he saw Kili’s disheveled look. Crawled out of bed, thin long sleeved shirt stretched over his hands as he hugged himself for warmth. His neck had spots of red and showed bites. He looked pale and rather sickly yet here he was asking if Frerin was okay. He gave a dry laugh. “It would fucking figure.”

“W-wh-a-what would?” God he was growing ever more cold. What was wrong with him?

Frerin rinsed off the suds from his hands and grabbed a cup from the cupboard. He set about making some coffee from his Keurig. Once the cup was poured his shoved it into Kili’s hands, his fingertips a little red. He got into Kili’s space glaring at him as he answered the student’s question. “That you would be just like him.”

He stepped back going back to the sink to finish scrubbing. “All gentle warmth and concerned about others more than your fucking self. A fucking perfect match made in fucking perfect heaven!”

Kili’s jaw slacked. He hadn’t thought that they had been pretty loud last night. It hadn’t occurred to him that someone would hear them during their tryst and be upset with it. Panic jump started his brain function. His hand went up to his neck and pulled back small flakes of dark, dark red. “Oh shit. Frerin.” He scrambled to try to think of something to say. “I didn’t- I mean, he- we- fuck! I just want you to know that I care for him, I don’t want this to be a one night stand. I’m not using your son, I couldn’t even if I wanted to, which I don’t want to, that’s beside the point. I’m sorry if you heard anything last night, I really, I need to learn how to be quieter or something, god that’s too much information to give to you.” Kili was now clutching the hot cup of coffee with a white knuckled grip.

“Kili!!” Frerin’s shout stopped the tirade of words. He gripped the side of the sink, leaning over it. “Enough…”

“I’m… sorry… are… are you okay with…” Kili waved a hand around. “With this?”

“I’m not!!” Frerin’s grip got even tighter, there was a sharp sound of porcelain snapping. He hissed and pulled his hands away from the sink, the tiled edge had broken. The sharp edges cut deeply into his palms. He moved to face Kili, his back straight and shoulders slightly hunched. He looked like he was about to kill someone, especially from the blood dripping from his hands. 

Kili took a step back, hesitating, before taking a step forward, then another. “Your-your hands.”

Frerin growled like an animal, rubbing a hand over his face, sliding it down to rub at his neck trying to relax himself. Keep his temper under control. Kili wasn’t to blame. “I’m not okay with this, Kili. I’m… so angry right now.”

“I didn’t mean-”

“I’m not angry at you!!” Frerin snapped. “I’m angry at him! I’m so pissed off with Fili I could vomit! He knew better than to do it but he still did it! And why? Because he dreams of you?”

Kili came closer still, cautious. He gently took hold of Frerin’s hands. His voice was calm as he looked at the wounds. He knew how to handle someone that was more dangerous than an animal. He’s had to help Dwalin down from bad highs before and he knew, absolutely knew that deep down in his core that Dwalin has killed before. “Take a breath, there we go. Alright. Now we’re going to wash your hands, okay?”

“Y-yeah.” Frerin’s shoulders rolled with each deep breath he huffed out. He could feel the fear that Kili was giving off, yet here he was, washing his hands gently to look at the wounds. “I have to know… did you dream of him?”

The brunet was quiet as he worked the soap over the red skin. He nodded. “Couldn’t get him out of my head.”

“Why did you-”

“Sleep with him? Because not everything I dreamed of was innocent.” Kili suddenly jerked to the side, a wet hand coming up to his hair. “Speaking of Fili, where is he?”

Frerin pulled his now clean hands away from Fili. “In the graveyard, most likely.”

“The grave- why would he go there?”

“He didn’t tell you anything did he?” He sighed heavily, hanging his head, his anger draining out of him. He felt cold and empty. If he only had Thorin here, it would be so much easier to deal with. “Get over to the graveyard and you don’t fucking come back until he’s told you everything. Don’t let him try to pussy foot around this or tear up on you and fucking use those baby blues on you. He’s not welcome back until he fucking fixes some of this damn mess up.”

When Kili didn’t make a move Frerin roared loudly, “NOW!”

That sent the young man scampering away, the tone showing that Frerin was at the end of his rope. When he finally heard the front door shut, he leaned against the doors that lead to underneath the sink. He slid down to his butt and allowed himself to cry. He had tried so hard, for so long. Now it was all for nothing. He couldn’t help but blame himself. If only he had been a better parent, if only he had talked to Fili more and made him understand completely how bad things were.

When Kili had seen them in the field he thought they could move, just go to another town, but it was all a wish on a black bird’s wings. Beaten off in flight, plummeted to the earth to end everything.

He was once a strong one, was bowed to for what he was, how he handled Hounds and Coven alike. He was respected, mighty, then he saw that little boy… those tearful blue eyes. He was stripped and left in the darkness, fumbling around trying to keep him safe. Thorin had taken his hand, had kissed his wounds closed, breathed life into him. He helped Frerin rise back up and now, now he was alone, crying on the kitchen floor because he was scared.

\-------------------------------

Fili couldn’t hold it in any more. He had tried, but seeing Frerin walk away after saying those things he found it impossible. It took him a while to walk to the graveyard, his limbs feeling as if they were filled with lead. He couldn’t got to her grave straight away, he had to lap around the grounds a few times before he finally picked up the courage to look at the headstone that was fixed in the ground.

“You!!” He didn’t mean to start yelling but it was all he could do. “This is all your fault!! You bloody, stupid, bitch!!”

He paced around the grave as he continued to shout for the still graveyard to hear. Not seeing that his long trek to this point was enough time for Kili to come. The brunet stopped his advancement listening to his distraught boyfriend. 

“I _believed_ you! I thought you were so damn wise, that you were so fucking right!!” He looked down to the grave, yelling at it as he thumped a fist against his heart. “You said I was the one!! You convinced me to Tether to you!! _’we’re meant to be together’_ you remember that?! But instead what I got was you dying on me! You fucking up my whole life!! Giving me that-that fucking **gift** , and now I find out that you’re not even the one I’m supposed to be with!! You’re not my Donor! You never were!! You **BITCH**!!” 

Fili fell to his knees, “Did you even love me?! Was I just some damn toy for you?!” He clawed at the grass, a scratching tickled the back of his throat. 

Kili felt like an eavesdropper, listening into a private conversation. When Fili fell to his knees, he moved forward, hands out to touch the man that was in such distress. “Fee.”

Fili let out a scream, punching at the ground over and over again.

“Fili, Fili!” Kili ran up, grabbing at the back of Fili’s jacket.

Fili tried to jerk away but Kili only pulled on him, collecting him into his arms and holding him tight. “Dude, dude, it’s okay. It’s okay.” He soothed. Fili slowly clutched onto him burying his face into Kili’s shoulder as a terrible sob ripped through him. He stroked his hair, keeping him close as his boyfriend nearly shrieked with emotional pain.

“It’s okay… it’s okay.”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Fili pushed out, his words muffled by Kili’s chest.

“Hey, hey, look at me.” Kili pulled back enough to take hold of Fili’s head, those watery blue eyes bloodshot and so sad. “Whatever you’re sorry for, you can’t keep it bottled up. Okay? So you’re, no, Fili, look at me. Good. So you’re going to tell me everything, got it?”

Fili shook his head, now looking desperate. “No.”

“Yes,” Kili nodded.

“You’ll hate me.”

“I can’t hate you… not you.” Kili pulled on Fili, kissing his lips softly.

“You’ll hate me, you’ll hate me.” Fili worried as Kili continued to give him tiny kisses.

“No, never.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hope this made sense... if you still have questions please ask them!

Fili wiped at his eyes with his sleeve, Kili was ramrod straight next to him, the two sitting on the grave. He had finally confessed, told Kili everything. It was point blank, it was blunt and now the brunet just sat in silence. Cold, large, heavy rain drops started to fall down, shattering against the different tombstones like glass. A few fell past Kili’s hair, forcing it to wave before more hit his head. He stared out at the view that the grave had. There was the highway that lead to town, beyond it fields, quiet and still. The silhouette of the mountains were blotted out from the heavy gray clouds of spring. It was a beautiful place to lay your bones to rest.

He reached up, touching his neck, the cold inside of him now had numbed his fingers. The frozen digits pressed against the wound feeling good over the slight burn. At first, he didn’t want to believe it, it sounded insane. Sounded as if Fili had been so damaged while growing up that he made up this world to live in, and he would have believed that. Helped Fili through his recovery of his shattered mind and kiss his wounds until they healed. That was… he would have made this excuse if it wasn’t for Frerin. His intense reaction, his anger, his palpable fear. It didn’t make sense to him that both would share the same illusion, the shattered wonderland filled with such corrupted darkness.

He felt Fili shift beside him, the man had curled up into himself as if he was a teenager. It made sense, all of the damage was done when he was a teen. It was natural to regress back into such a state, at least that’s what Ori would say.

“So…” God his voice sounded loud. He cleared his throat and moved a bit to the side. He twisted around to look at the headstone. “Dis… she was… a witch.”

Fili nodded.

“And… you’re a vampire… so is Frerin.”

Fili curled in on himself even more, but he still nodded. 

“Vampires… they have someone they call a Donor who is like a soul mate?”

A shrug of the shoulders.

“Yes or no, Fili?”

“It’s yes and no.” Fili’s words had a hard edge to it, trying not to yell once more. His throat burned from screaming earlier. “A Donor isn’t… doesn’t have to be a mate, or a husband or a wife or whatever. But we… we’re attracted to each other. Can always find each other through circumstance or, even concentrated on, on purpose. Th-” Fili took in a long shaking breath. “Thorin and Frerin can find each other without trying.”

“Thorin is… Frerin’s Donor.”

A nod.

“Frerin is really your adopted father.”

“Yes.”

“You were born a vampire.”

“We both were.”

“And… Dis, when you were fourteen years old, convinced you she was your Donor and you… Tethered? What-what’s Tethering again?”

Fili’s fingers found their way into his hair, stroking in a way to keep himself calm. “Tethering is bonding. We… um…” It was so hard to explain.

“Will I turn blond like you said Frerin did?”

“What?” Fili’s head lifted from his knees. “No.”

“Pity, I would make a hot blond.” Kili smiled a tiny bit at Fili, showing he didn’t hold any hard feelings. His smile faltered when all he got were those beautiful blue eyes raking over him, staring at him as if he was still trying to figure Kili out. He heaved a heavy sigh. “Look, I’m… I don’t know what I am right now. I should be angry with you. Pissed off really, I mean you did mangle my neck while giving me some mind blowing sex, but… I look at you and I still see that thing that messes with me. How you’re not right but you’re not wrong, you’re something completely different and I can’t figure it out. I want to… I honestly want to believe you’re crazy but the more I think on it the more I wonder if you are.”

Fili looked away, his nose wrinkling as he did that sniffle without a sound.

“Look… I don’t… know how you got to be the way you are now. Well, I know it because you told me, but it doesn’t make sense. So could you go over it again?”

Fili held up a fist and coughed into it. He was tired, he felt sick, he wanted to go home and beg Frerin’s forgiveness and sleep the rest of his life away but Kili deserved the truth.

“When I was twelve Frerin adopted me, moved up here. I met Dis then. I was a quiet thing back then.”

Kili snorted a laugh, which earned him sharp glare. “Sorry… continue.”

“Dis was Coven, a witch. I was still learning about everything, barely knew the basics of Tethering and how it worked, how it happened. Sometimes it happens naturally like… like with you but other times you need to force it, this way you can… keep an eye on your “meal ticket”. Dis… she said sweet things to me, pulled at me trying to get me out of my shell. I liked her… a lot. I had convinced myself that I loved her that she was my Donor, it didn’t help that she said it too. I Tethered to her after knowing her for a bit, then she died… She died after she…” A whimper came from the back of his throat. “It hurt so bad when she did it, but I thought I was helping the person I loved, the one I was going to grow up with and marry. And I just… let her.”

Kili reached over, placing his hand against Fili’s wet back as the rain continued to pelt down on them. “Say it all, Fili.”

“She made me do it, now that I can see back without fooling myself.” He liked his lips and looked up at the sky. “She bullied me into it to take her magic. And when it was over she left and I was stuck there in so much pain. It hurts so badly at times still, and I have to drink Frerin’s blood, it’s the only thing that stops that agony of feeling as if you’re being turned inside out. I found out that because of… because of the magic I could walk in the sunlight. Then I found out she died the night she did this to me… Suddenly we were a large target for the Hounds and Coven. When she died they blamed it on us even though it was a car wreck, an accident. Frerin kept me safe, we moved all around the country, hiding away. When we went to Louisiana… he almost died. A powerful Coven found us, but not just them, an old, old family of vampires did as well. They found out I could walk in the sunlight and they wanted it too. It started up like a gang war, they met at a place and lined up, boxed us in.”

“How old were you when this happened?”

Fili looked to the ground. “This all happened between the ages of twelve and fourteen… I think… I think I was thirteen at this point. Frerin… Frerin had good social standing with the vampires. He was dangerous, vicious, killed without question like an alpha werewolf in a pack. But when he got me he lost a lot of that.”

“Why?”

Fili shifted, looking at Kili with his brows drawn together. “Don’t you get it? Anyone who gets me in their life gets screwed over…”

Kili gazed back. Fili honestly believed this. “Tell me the real reason, Fili. Why did he lose his status?”

“Because he adopted me! I just told you!” 

“Why would adopting you be such a sin?!”

“Because I was born from a werewolf!!”

“What?!” Kili stood up suddenly. “No, no, you can’t be this fucking weird. You were born a vampire to werewolf parents and had a witch give you magical abilities?! Come on! There is only so much I can take!”

“Mom wasn’t a werewolf when I was born!” Fili groaned. He had worded it wrong.”

“But you just said-”

“Mom wasn’t a werewolf, she was human, dad was a born vampire. A werewolf turned mom when I was fucking tiny and in the vampire society that means she was always a werewolf because they’re discriminating assholes! Frerin lost all his standing because he adopted me to keep me safe from all the werewolf and vampire political bullshit that mom’s turning caused.”

“And how is this your fault?!”

“Because I was born!!”

Kili crouched down, grabbing fistfuls of Fili’s secondhand jacket. He pulled hard and snarled in his boyfriend’s face. “That’s bullshit and you know it. If you weren’t born I wouldn’t have you and no matter how fucked up this shit is, I’m not letting you fucking go, so you drop this nonsense about you creating all the fucking problems in the world, right now. Because I’m not having any of it!” He pulled on Fili more until the blond was standing. He roughly brushed off Fili’s coat and pants. “Now you’re going to tell me everything else while we walk home and if Frerin doesn’t want you there then he’s going to have his balls kicked in because you’re soaked to the bone. Got it?”

Fili stared at him, an unreadable expression. He slowly made one foot move in front of the other as he walked past Kili, shoving his hands into his pockets.

“Where… where was I?”

“Telling me how Frerin nearly died.”

A pink tongue flickered out, wetting chapping lips. “He was… um… we were boxed in. The scramble to safety was bad. The vampires tried to grab us, the Coven tried to kill us. I remember being picked up like a football by a vampire, she was running to the woods. She-she stopped in her tracks, didn’t have enough time to scream when the vines sprouted out of her skin, slithering up a tree like a snaked, making her hang there… vacant of all life…”

Kili slipped his arm through Fili’s, linking them together for support. Fili glanced over at him, clearing his throat that had gotten gobbed up with saliva and words.

“Frerin single handedly managed to kill half of the Coven, but… the vampires were after him as well. He was the only thing standing between them and me. He was… he was torn up as if alligators had been feeding off a corpse. I could-I could see the bones in his hands and thigh… his stomach… His… his stomach.” 

Fili pulled away from Kili, bending over and throwing up on the gravel of the simple road that came in and out of the small graveyard. Flashes of the fight were running through his head. Blood and screams, the roar of vampires, the sharp stinging scent of magic. Frerin laying on the ground, half of his face missing, his stomach ripped open, entrails exposed. He was still alive. Shivering, quacking. Fili was screaming for him, crawling on his belly around stomping feet and earth that moved on its own. Frerin’s fingers twitched, his last energy spent trying to reach for the young blond. When Fili got to him he tried to tuck Frerin’s stomach back inside his body, he tried to put flesh back over exposed bone, his hands so red as his mind went into shock. The only person to ever have loved him was dying. Then everything stopped, the screams, the sounds of bone breaking, earth ripping, all of it, so quiet. He bent over and sealed his mouth over Frerin’s, he didn’t know what he was doing. There was no way he could have, all he wanted was him to be alive. He pushed and pushed and pushed until something lodged free from deep inside of him. He forced a Tether, a small one for this piece of _something_ traveling along with it into his father. He then fell unconscious. 

“Fili… It’s okay.” Kili was holding Fili’s hair out of the way as he threw up bile and water. “You don’t have to go into detail… it’s okay. Frerin’s here, he’s alive…”

Fili took in several deep breaths, spitting on the ground then breathing deeply once again. He had not thought about that time in a long, long time. He felt his back being rubbed in comforting circles. 

God he felt dizzy and sick.

“Okay, so, Frerin lived through that, but how?”

“I-uh-I joined our lives together.” Fili took in a few more deep breaths. “He-he has half my life.”

“How the fuck-”

Fili shook his head. “I don’t know. I don’t… understand magic. Coven keep it within families, it’s never been given to a vampire or werewolf or even a normal human before.”

“So the field?”

“Can we… can we get home? I don’t feel well.”

“Yeah, sorry.” Kili wrapped his arm around Fili, guiding him along. “Let’s get you home.”


	15. Chapter 15

The simple rain of the day turned into a raging storm by the time they got home. The wind howled, battering the rain against them, pelting hard enough to sting. Kili tried to cover Fili with what little of his coat that he could, the two hunched together as the temperature dropped. He held onto his boyfriend as they finally took refuge in Fili’s house.

“Get your asses into that bathroom right now!!” Frerin’s bark was enough to send both scrambling as fast as they could.

They were still shivering, trying hard to peel off the layers of wet clothing, a growing puddle forming under their feet. Fili struggled to get his shoes off, finally getting them off with a suctioning pop while Kili was stuck with a shirt refusing to go more than halfway over his head. The door swung open causing both to jerk with a start. 

Frerin didn’t say anything as he put down a pile of towels and clean clothes onto the counter. Emergency candles rolled off the top of the tower of cloth and clattered into the sink.

Fili tried to find his voice as the man set up the candles by the mirror, lighting them as the lights flickered. He wanted to reach out, grab hold of his shirt. Seek comfort from the one he had always been able to rely on, but his hands felt heavy. A heckling of self doubt pestered him that he didn’t deserve such a guardian, one that dedicated himself so faithfully. He looked away as Frerin left the room, shutting the door behind him. The soft click sounded worse than any slam or bang.

“He loves you, you know.” Kili said softly as he finally managed to pull off his shirt. 

Fili’s shoulders pushed down as if a bit more weight was added to them. The blond swallowed, giving the briefest of the shaking of his head. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it matters.” Kili stepped up to Fili, he wrapped his arms around him from behind. He rested his cheek against his boyfriend’s temple. He just held him as the power flickered once more before plunging the room into darkness. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust to the gentle glow of the candles.

It was so quiet, he couldn’t even hear Fili breathing. 

He moved his hands, rubbing over the wet cloth of the vampire’s shirt.

“Look,” He whispered softly against wet, golden hair. “I don’t claim to understand any of this. Donors, witches, vampires, werewolves… I honestly don’t get any of it… But I do know a few things.” Kili began untucking Fili’s shirt. “What I know is that I’ve never felt like this about anyone before. I’ve had girlfriends, a few I even thought ‘this is the one, the one I’ll marry’, and it never happened.” He sought out the buttons of the shirt, slowly undoing them as he rested his chin on Fili’s shoulder.

“Kili, I don’t really want to hear about your exes… not right now.”

“I know, I know, but hear me out.” Kili pressed a kiss to Fili’s temple, stilling his ministrations. He closed his eyes, letting his lips linger as he felt a twist of pain in his chest. Fili was hurting. He didn’t need to be a psychic or Tethered or whatever to know this.

He kept his face in that mess of gold hair as he continued. “I want you to know, I never knew what was good for myself. So I focused on others; watching them, helping them, giving advice. And I know two broken hearts when I see them. Frerin loves you just as much as you love him. But he’s scared and he’s acting tough to cover it up, just as you cover it up by going quiet.”

Fili slowly turned around, his gaze was hesitant but it came up to meet brown eyes, so warm, so inviting and safe. Kili smiled softly, giving Fili’s shirt a tug.

“Finish undressing, I’ll draw the bath.”

The vampire nodded, turning away once more now busying himself with fully taking off his clothing. Kili started up the bath water, holding his fingers under the water before deeming it warm enough. He took the hem of his pants and started to tug them off, a warm hand went over his back, trailing up as Fili stepped past him to step into the water. Kili looked up in time to see the fash of Fili’s manhood as he sank down in the dull light. He couldn’t help the lick of his lips, remembering the flavor of it, the texture. How good it felt in his mouth, to have it…

Fili’s eyes were on him now, half lidded and tired. He laid back, using his feet to turn off the faucet as he got his head submerged into the warm water, to wash away the cold. Kili bit his lip as he finally got out of his pants and was now naked. He gingerly sat on the edge of the tub, looking through the flickering shadows at his boyfriend. Fili did things to him that no one else ever had. He still wasn’t sure how to exactly process the whole vampire thing. He reached up and touched his neck, he still hasn’t really looked at it, he really should, it may need antibiotic cream or something.

When Fili sat up, Kili reached over him, his chest brushing against the blond’s nose as he grabbed a bar of soap. He dipped it into the water and started to work up a lather.

“So… will I turn into a vampire, like you?” Kili asked, more for conversation than anything else. 

“I…” Fili frowned. “I don’t know.”

“Sooo, you’ve never bitten anyone but Frerin before?”

“I have. I’ve bitten Dis, thinking she was my Donor.” He stilled himself, his body wanting to move away when Kili made a sudden movement. The brunet twisted around and slipped into the water behind him, bath water sloshing onto the floor. Fili made a mental note to mop it up before leaving the room.

Kili ran his soapy hands over Fili’s shoulders, flexing his fingers. He ran his thumbs up the back of Fili’s neck, giving a little pressure.

“Then biting doesn’t change people on average. Right?”

“Right.”

“But it can happen.”

“Yes, but on ra-aaah~” Fili bit his bottom lip to cut off the cry of pleasure that tried to claw out of his mouth.

Kili blinked, he leaned back to see what he had done to elicit such a reaction only to frown. He had just moved his hands from Fili’s neck to his back. He flattened his palms against his boyfriend’s back, gave a gentle pressure, rubbing a little. Fili hissed and moved away, he quietly got up, unplugging the tub and starting up the shower instead. It would use up the last of the hot water but it was a blatant effort to cover something up.

“Is, Is your back sensitive?” Kili asked as Fili kept from facing him.

“I-I’m not used to being touched.” Fili confessed.

Kili got up to his feet, the soap now rinsed off of beautiful skin. Kili carefully ran his hand over Fili’s hip, around and to the front.

“No.” Fili tried to get out of his grip.

The student pulled on him, rubbing his slowly awakening groin up against Fili’s firm backside. His fingers brushing against a swelling cock.

“It’s okay.” He whispered, kissing at Fili’s back. He cradled Fili’s cock in his hand, feeling it slowly fill more and more from every kiss he put on the vampire’s back.

“Kili, no.” Fili turned around.

His lips were sealed in a kiss, tongue delving into his mouth, lapping and encouraging. He couldn’t help but kiss back. Sloppy and slick under the shower. He was raising his hands up to grab Kili and pull him closer when he realized what he was doing. He broke the kiss and stepped out of the shower. He grabbed one of the towels and wrapped it around his waist.

“I’m sorry.” Kili berated himself. “It’s terrible timing but, I just… something came over me and I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Fili took another towel. He threw it on the floor and pushed it around with his foot to mop up the water they had spilled.

“Could you at least pretend to be angry with me?”

Fili stopped. “... It is bad timing.”

Kili stood still, those four words felt more painful than they should have. But he did ask for it.

He slowly turned off the water and waited for Fili to get dressed. The blond hesitated before leaving the bathroom. Kili hissed under his breath as he grabbed the last towel and viciously scrubbed it over his skin and hair. “God damn it! What were you thinking, Kili?! He’s depressed! He needs you beside him not trying to jerk him off in the shower you creep!”

Kili roughly put on his clothes and stormed out to the guest bedroom. He grabbed half the pillows and one of the blankets and threw them on the hard floor. It was late, he was tired, he was angry, and he wanted to forget today. Forget the crazy things, forget the drama… forget his own stupidity. He squeezed his eyes shut trying to will himself to sleep as the storm outside howled. 

Fili stayed up late, everyone else gone to bed leaving him in the darkness.

_He loves you, you know._

He chewed on the skin around his nails, ripping off a bit and spitting it out as Kili’s words rolled around in his head. He didn’t know what to do. He had never gotten on Frerin’s bad side before, not like this. Frerin always tried to help him, always tried to be strong and support him, doing anything he could to keep him safe.

He closed his eyes, seeing flashes of Frerin on the ground, blood everywhere. Fili whimpered grabbing his head. He didn’t want to remember that time.

His hands were red, Frerin’s eyes glazing over with death.

Fili shot up to his feet. He hurried down the hall and without being invited in or knocking he slipped into Frerin’s bedroom. He climbed along the mattress to the sleeping figure. He shook Frerin’s shoulder. It was ridiculous. Pathetic really. Fili was a grown man, acting like a little kid in need of comfort from his parent. But on the other hand, for so long it had been just him and Frerin, so many years that they relied on just each other, or more of him relying on Frerin. It made them close, incredibly close. They were co dependent, adapted to each other’s habits and space that they were just shy of knowing what the other was thinking at all times. When Fili hit adulthood many cities they took up the visage of being twins and got away with it. One being angry with the other was short lived and they still sought each other out first and foremost even after Frerin got Thorin.

So when Fili shook Frerin, it was instinct to lift up the blanket and let the other slip in. It was normal to tuck Fili’s head under his chin and pull him into a loose hold. It would not be until the images left Fili’s mind, reassured that Frerin was alive and well, that they would talk, if at all.

That night, they didn’t talk. Only held onto each other in silent apology for what had happened and what was to come.


	16. Chapter 16

Ori sighed as the keys jingled in his hand. “You sure?”

“Yeah. I’m ahead enough that I can miss a few days, and I can call my mom for a ride or even have Fili or Frerin take me to the dorms if something happens.” Kili licked his lips. To be honest he wanted to leave, to run away from the darkness that was starting to settle in his stomach. But he couldn’t. He needed to talk to Fili, make sure everything was okay. He needed to figure everything out, understand what was going on. Ori didn’t have to be a part of this mess. He could be safe, back on campus and taking classes now that he was feeling better.

“And you programed the GPS thingie right?”

“Yeah.” Kili pointed to what Ori was asking about. “All ready to go.”

“I’ll call you when I get back okay?”

“It would be ideal for you to get a hold of me so I know my car made it.”

Ori snorted. “Your car. Thanks for the concern.”

“Hey I have to be worried over my car. You, you’ll be fine, you’ll fly out of any blazing accident on your magic Ori powers. My car on the other hand will be totaled.”

“Magic Ori powers?” The red head raised a brow. “Really?”

“I’m tired, got into my first fight with my boyfriend, leave me alone. I can’t quip like I normally can.”

“So you are dating him!” He said more excited than he should have. “I was wondering when you would tell me who the person in your head was. Ever since you came back from spring break you’ve been acting weird.”

Kili sighed, rubbing at his brow. Shit, he was really that bad? Ori wasn’t the most observant when it came to friends then that meant everyone else knew which also meant Nori was plotting something to get the information from him because Nori couldn’t mind his own business and Dwalin would want to know who “she” is.

“Don’t tell anyone, okay? No matter what Nori or Dwalin do, don’t tell them a thing.”

“Why?”

“Because I asked you to Ori. I need to sort some things out with Fili before I even know if I’m officially dating him or not and I don’t want Dwalin and Nori pestering either of us to get to know Fili. He’s a private person if you haven’t noticed, even more so than you.”

“Hey!”

“The point is, I’m asking you, please, just keep it quiet.”

“Fine. But if Nori gets into your GPS to know where you’ve been that’s not my fault.”

“Good point.” Kili reached in to the vehicle and pulled it out.

“Kili, don’t I need-” He watched with wide eyes as Kili threw it onto the ground and stomped on it. “Okay… guess I’m following the freeway and road signs for home then.”

“Good thing you can read.”

“Yyyeah.” Ori slowly got into the car. “I’ll… call you when I get back.”

“Have a safe trip.”

Ori grumbled about how that wasn’t creepy at all. He buckled himself in and drove off leaving Kili in the parking lot.

Kili shifted, running his hand over his shoulder. He slept badly, his neck was sore and his left side hurt from being on the hard floor. He needed to get himself back, but also found the increasing need to have an excuse to go back. He hated having fights with the person he was romantically with. He never knew what to do afterwards and only a few times did he ever have a relationship survive the first squabble. … and he wanted to keep Fili.

He pushed past the anxiety building and walked down the road. He went to the grocery store picking up some coke-a-cola as well other things for snacks and nibbles. Mostly things to bake or fry and would be perfect to eat when one was depressed. He also grabbed more than needed of salad making items complete with bacon bits and sunflower seeds and croutons. He now had an excuse to go back. He now had food and they were going to sit and get over this.

He walked back with a pep in his step. It was funny, the closer he walked he felt his chest get warmer. His mind drifted over to different aspects of Fili. His eyes, his hair, the way his nose would wrinkle when he smiled. His earthen smell, the feel of the softest of brushes of lips upon his cheek.

He didn’t bother knocking, so distracted by his thoughts that he didn’t see the new car in the driveway and just came right in and once again was greeted by chaos. He was grabbed by the jacket, pulled hard and slammed into the wall, his sacks dropped to the ground as he was greeted by a set of very angry blue eyes framed by dark hair.

“Thorin, no!!”

Kili looked startled over towards the two vampires that were in the hallway. Frerin had one hand holding Fili back his other reaching out to the strange man that had Kili pinned up against the wall, a good foot off of the ground. The pressure of the man’s forearms crushed on his chest, keeping him from sliding down to be choked by his collar. The sound of Frerin’s voice seemed to calm the unbridled fury that was being burned into him.

“You can’t kill him. He was the one we were talking about. This is Kili.” Frerin edged forward.

“Kili.” Thorin’s lip curled. He remembered that name, remembered how he was supposed to be the new friend. “Did you sleep with him?”

“What?” Kili’s hand clutched Thorin’s iron hard forearms. The guy was built like a tank and was just as hard as one!

Thorin pulled Kili away from the wall and slammed him back against it. “Did you fuck my boy?!”

Frerin and Fili shouted at Thorin, Frerin having a hard time keeping Fili back.

“I- we- we made love, yes. But we’re dating and it’s okay so-” 

The dark haired man made a motion, it was so fluid and fast that Kili had not realized that something was happening until he was being thrown into the air as Thorin was tackled by Frerin. His shoulder and head collided with the opposite wall of the hallway. Fili grabbed him by the shoulders pulling him back against his chest, scrambling down the hall as fast as he could. As he was pulled along he saw Frerin struggling with Thorin, trying to rid the man of a knife he had clearly intended on sticking into a vital portion of Kili’s body. 

Frerin managed to straddle Thorin, twisting the man’s steely grip on the knife and stabbing it into the hardwood floor. Both of them panted as they bucked and twisted trying to get the upper hand until the vampire had enough. He balled his fist and slammed it down as hard as he could close enough to Thorin’s head that the impact left the soldier’s ears ringing. It sounded like a gunshot, causing the two youngest to stumble and look back.

The seasoned fighters panted and growled at each other.

The world stood still.

Kili was dizzy from hitting his head and nearly getting killed. He jerked when Fili’s hand cupped his cheek. He gently got him to look over to him as fingers gently touched the growing bump on his head. 

“Are you okay?” Fili asked in a whisper.

Kili nodded as his mind slowly relaxed enough for him to gain back his other senses. His fingers were hurting, he didn’t know he had clutched onto Fili so tightly, his knuckles white. His head was starting to pulse and his lungs ached from nearly hyperventilating. 

Fili shooshed him. “It’s okay, it’s all okay now. The fight’s over.”

“W-what just happened and who the hell is that guy?”

“That’s Frerin’s Donor, Thorin… kind of… like my other dad.”

“Fucking hell, with that kind of reaction to you getting a boyfriend as an adult I’m glad I didn’t know you when you were a teen.”


	17. Chapter 17

Thorin was not someone to trifle with. He was a Hunter, not a Hound. He had a sharp mind, a well trained body, and he knew how to make someone disappear. Not the usual, “Have you seen Kili? I haven’t seen him.” No, he could _erase_ someone. Family, friends, lovers, strangers, it didn’t matter, he would make sure they all forgot about him. He would get rid of school records, doctor visits, birth certificates, DMV, plane tickets, social security numbers, it didn’t matter, he would find any scrap of evidence that showed that Kili once was alive and get rid of it. It suddenly made the grocery receipt seem more important to him. It showed he had done that, he was alive, he was here. But he wasn’t sure how much longer that was going to ring true with how Thorin glared at him from across the table.

Despite his petrifying fear he was somewhat happy, at least for Fili. He seemed to have opened up a great deal. He was currently talking with Thorin, or more of at him. Rattling on about this and that which bled into the story of how he had met Kili. Giving him details of the soda can to the head, which the sadistic bastard smirked at and congratulated Fili on nearly Kili with a usually non lethal object. Seriously who does that?!

“Please stop looking at him like that.” Fili asked softly, scooting closer and taking up one of Thorin’s hands. He brushed his thumb over the runic tattoo over a finger that represented him. “We did try, we tried to stay away from each other. But he’s my Donor…”

Thorin put his hand over Fili’s, patting it. He suddenly looked like a father talking to his teenage daughter not a grizzly bear about to tear Kili apart. “Are you sure?”

“We Tethered.”

“Tethering doesn’t mean he’s your Donor.” Thorin said sharply.

Fili looked over his shoulder at Kili, suddenly looking hesitant. He pressed his lips together. Suddenly he was closed up, the Fili that Kili knew and it hurt. He looked away and leaned over to Thorin, whispering into his ear. The other’s brow creased, making his dark features even darker.

“Are you sure?”

Fili nodded. He covered his mouth and coughed into his sleeve.

Thorin ran a hand over Fili’s hair, gripping the back of his neck. He dipped down looking him in the eyes. “Go help Frerin in the kitchen.”

Fili coughed once more. Kili shifted in his seat, looking worriedly at Fili’s back. That sounded significantly worse than the first cough.

“Fili?” 

Fili turned and smiled, while getting up. He looked tired. 

“Maybe you should go to bed.” Kili said worriedly. 

“I’ll be fine.” He tried to assure while he went into the neighboring room. “Thorin wants to talk to you for a bit, in private… Don’t worry, he’ll leave you alone.”

Kili watched him, left in a room with a guy who wanted him dead. Silence fell between them before Thorin spoke up, his fingers drumming on the table.

“How much as Fili told you?”

“Everything… but I-I don’t understand it.” He said shame faced. He reached up and rubbed at the wound on his neck, it was oddly comforting to touch.

Thorin pointed at him. “Did he explain that?”

“He fed on me… yeah.” He gave a shrug of one shoulder. “It made me feel cold but honestly, I don’t mind it.”

“No, that, why you touch it.”

Kili shook his head.

Thorin adjusted himself in his seat. “It’s not part of the Tethering, if you were wondering. It’s part of being his Donor.” He fiddled with his watch, mostly to have something to do with his hands. “Fili’s a good boy, but he puts things bluntly and doesn’t realize how things need to be explained.”

“What is a Donor exactly? Far as I know it is is and is not a soul mate and it could and could not be used against him.”

“To understand a Donor you need to understand vampire society.” Thorin got up causing Kili to recoil, expecting the guy to pull out a knife and try to stab him again. The hunter chose to ignore the jumpy behavior as he dug in his pockets and spilled out a handful of change. He divided the coins up in piles of value. He pushed the pennies out. “Imagine these pennies are the lower rung, the vampires that were turned through biting. Biting does not usually change someone, it is a very low percentage. Nothing special has to happen like drinking vampire blood, or having some ceremony done to you, or even spread through like an STD. Biting is natural occurring, once changed vampires will bring you in, teach you what you need to know, train you how to live. Vampires covit their own because they are rare. Even more rare are the natural born.” This time Thorin moved the nickles. “Natural born are of greater value than bitten. Most natural born are done so between a vampire and human parent, like Fili. They age like humans, but a little bit stronger, a little bit faster. They usually consist on a diet that is a mixture of blood as well as human food, just like bitten.” Thorin then grabbed the dimes. “Natural born can raise in rank in the society of vampires.”

“So the nickels can become dimes.” Kili leaned over the table looking at the visual aide. He was more of a visual person when it came to explanations.

“Exactly. They can climb up from Managers, who organize Feeding Parties. What they do is help vampires in their feeding grounds. Know where easy pickings are, keep the flow from being too strong to get Hounds and Hunters on them. Managers… are like store managers. They schedule shifts, and keep the store going. Natural born can become Owners as well.”

“Owners? Like slave trades?”

“Almost. Owners will find willing humans that they keep in their own personal area, mostly large buildings like apartment complexes or mansions that they fill with humans that want vampires to feed off of them.”

“Like a restaurant?”

Thorin nodded. “Exactly, except, sometimes Owners will turn their places into a brothel as well. Owners are easier for hunters and hounds to find because they tend to stay in one place and even advertise. They’ll attract vampires that wish to feed until someone is dead or just have a lust to kill. Owners have a more dangerous job but it fills a need. If they are good then all benefit from it even the human society as the humans are employed for their services. World goes round, everything fine.”

“Then where does it go bad?”

The older man looked at Kili. He seemed to have asked the right question.

He pushed a few quarters towards Kili. “Here, in the High Born. They are the ones that are born of vampire parents. Stronger than any human, faster, smarter, much more dangerous.”

“Frerin.” Kili mumbled.

“Exactly. He is a High Born. They have an ancient set of laws that they must abide by because they are considered pure bloods. They are not to mingle with bitten, they are not to drink blood of humans.”

“Then what do they feed off of?”

“Other vampires. Their diet consists of nothing but blood. They are sacred in their society, like cardinals in the catholic church.”

“Then there has to be a pope.”

Thorin nodded. He pulled out a fifty cent piece. It was placed on the table with a clack. “There has to be a pope.” He agreed. “But they do not have just one, they have three to each continent, they will gather at times to discuss politics and regions, very normal things that are mirrored by human world leaders.”

“Fili said that Frerin lost everything because he took him in… what… what rank was he?”

“Keeper. He was one rank under one of the ‘popes’ of North America. He was being groomed to take the place of Thrain.”

“What are these popes called?”

“Regnum.”

“Regnum? That’s a… a weird title.”

“It’s a very old word, Roman. It means ‘inheritable power to govern’.”

“Well if Frerin was a Keeper and about to become a…” He tried not to fumble the world. “Regnum. Then how did he meet Fili?”

“You said he told you everything, even about his birth parents?”

“His mom was turned into a werewolf.”

“Exactly. Vampires believe that if someone is turned then they had been born wrong and the world had corrected it by allowing them to be changed.So, if you are ever changed, in vampire society you were always meant to be that way. Which meant, Fili was suddenly a bastard child of a werewolf. This is scandalous for them, it has happened before but no often enough to ease the blow when it recurs. The werewolves easily took his mother in, but she didn’t want Fili, him being vampire born would not be able to fit into werewolf society. His father wanted nothing to do with him as he was birthed from a she wolf.. The wolves stated that he was birthed rightfully by his mother with the vampire father and that the vampires believe that when born a vampire one will always be a vampire. The child custody battle went up from Managers to regional Owners, up to the Keepers where it was deemed that neither parent would have Fili. Frerin was not the one on the case, he had seen the boy when he was simply walking down the hall and decided to sit with him. They easily bonded, and soon as Frerin was within age he adopted him which cost him his rank.”

“Fucking assholes.” Kili grumbled. He rubbed at his temple. “Well… this is great and all but how does a Donor work? Fili said you were -are, Frerin’s Donor and if he’s supposed to drink nothing but vampire blood then why does he drink yours and eats human food? Also why does Fili sometimes drink Frerin blood?”

“A Donor is more sacred than High Born. We are rare, as rare as a hunter.” He smirked at the word play. “Donors are humans that are compatible with vampires. We are everything they need. They eat us, they breathe us, the live us.”

Kili’s face contorted in confusion. “What?” 

“We help them live. It becomes impossible for them to live without us. They connect, mentally and emotionally to us. We become their everything, their whole world. When you have nightmares Fili feels it. When you get angry, or scared, he feels it. Happy, sad, excited, all of it he experiences it as if you are one being. You rub at your neck because it sets you at ease, a connection to him. You stay though I want to kill you because you want to know he’s safe, that he is well. It’s beyond love, and it’s beyond codependency. You’re now bonded in a way that very few can even fathom.”

“Knowing this and you still tried to kill me?”

Thorin glared at him. “I thought he was confused. Another had claimed to be his Donor before and ruined his life.”

“Then what changed your mind?” Kili glared back.

“The doll house.”

A sudden chill ran up Kili’s spine. He swallowed as he remembered blue and white walls. How did Thorin know about a doll house? “A-a what?”

Thorin simply gathered his coins and put them back in his pockets, making sure to tuck his fifty cent piece away in another pocket. It was his lucky charm, minted the same year Fili was born. He always kept it on him.

Kili took in a slow breath willing the images of the doll house out of his mind. He would talk to Fili about that later and how the hell that would be important to Thorin. But right now something else needed to be addressed.

“You said… I could be used against him. How?”

“You’re connected. Any Coven can use you to track him down.” He pressed his palms flat on the table, leaning over Kili, glaring at him. “Let me make myself clear. Because of _you_ he’s in even more danger. Not just him but Frerin as well. _My_ family will be hunted down and slaughtered. If they are lucky they will be found by a pack of Hounds and killed quickly while having to watch each other’s deaths. Coven will seek them out and torture them to try to extract the magic that is in Fili, the same magic that keeps Frerin alive. Vampires will experiment on them to try to understand how the magic allows them to walk in daylight.”

Kili looked down at the table, letting this sink in. The gravity of the situation pressing down on his shoulders, weighing down. He swallowed. Thorin didn’t have to say it, Kili’s life was no longer his own. He could no longer do the things that he once had. He couldn’t talk to strangers and become easy friends with anyone. He had to walk with a continuous glance over his shoulder. Fili and Frerin had to be kept safe.

“Thorin, stop intimidating him.” Frerin came in seeing his husband leaning over Kili. His hands filled with a platter of food. He lifted up his foot and lightly kicked Thorin’s backside. “Sit your ass down, it’s dinner time.”

Thorin gave Kili a lingering glare before moving away with an easy shrug. “As you wish.”

“And don’t quote my favorite movie to get out of this. He’s barely a pup.”

“Hey!” Kili protested.

“It’s not my fault you like a movie like Princess Bride.” Thorin took his rightful seat at the head of the table as Frerin put down a fancy platter of rather decorative meats running from blue all the way to well done. “Princess Buttercup.”

“Do not call me that.” Frerin still smiled.

Thorin smiled softly watching his husband disappear back into the kitchen. “You’re right, you’re more beautiful than her.”

Fili came in with a pile of plates and silverware. He started to set the places, as he passed by Kili he mumbled. “It’s kind of disgusting how they continue to act like newlyweds, and it’ll only get worse since they haven’t seen each other for a while. So try not to throw up or get diabetes from watching them.”

Kili leaned his head against Fili’s the two sharing a small laugh. He liked this Fili, the open, fully of smiles and excitement vampire.

When they sat down to eat, it was very civil, normal. Potatoes, vegetables and meat were passed around. Kili found out that Fili very much enjoyed the blue meats, mopping up the blood on his plate with a bit of bread roll. He also liked garlic potatoes. And Fili was right, Thorin and Frerin were disgustingly cute. Leaning over to share kisses, whispering into each other’s ears with secret smiles and small laughs. By the end of the meal they were holding hands while finishing. 

Kili looked over to Fili who was coughing into his sleeve. He reached under the table and touched his knee. He rubbed his thumb over the jeans to give him a bit of comfort. 

These people… he was stuck with them now. He didn’t feel comfortable with calling them family just yet, but he had Fili and Fili was everything.

Frerin eventually got up. “Come on Fili, lets get some medicine in you and put you to bed.”

“Okay.” Fili’s voice was ragged from his coughing.

Thorin got up as well and started to collect the plates. Kili wasn’t sure what to do with himself so he cautiously aided the Hunter. They were quiet, as they cleaned up. The clinks of plates and cups the only thing between them. Kili found it odd how easily he fell into this roll, how easy it was to accept, even though a part of him felt numb. He was still digesting everything. 

That night he slept in Fili’s bed, though he didn’t sleep much as his thoughts plagued him and Fili’s coughing got worse.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying out this ancient tradition of looking over your work before you post it.  
> So maybe there will be less typos. 
> 
> And check out this totally awesome cool, fantastic, beautiful, I hate you so much for making this so beautiful, piece of artwork that was done for this story~ [done by linane-art.](http://linane-art.tumblr.com/post/84831417656/for-the-adorable-werecakes-an-illustration-to-her)

Warm wind was blowing on him, rocking him gently to and fro. He could feel it brush against his scalp, ruffling the hair that was longer on the top. It would feel nice if it wasn’t for the squeak of iron that sang in the distance pulling at his consciousness and overriding the feeling of gentle comfort. A hing? A gate perhaps, in need of oil.

Opening his eyes was hard. He had to will himself to push out of the warmth, struggle to pry his lids open. Once open his vision was blurry, everything was a strange combination of bright light with the stark, sudden, contrast of shadow. It was difficult to make out shapes. He rubbed at his eyes, his elbow coming down and hitting against something solid. He paused.

That wasn’t right. He should be in bed next to Fili.

He distinctly remembered Fili’s cough finally subsiding after a heavy dose of nighttime medicine. It was approaching dawn, the birds chirped outside at an annoying pitch and tone that made it nearly impossible for him to force himself to sleep.

He did a double take because none of this could possibly be real. Hesitant the first time, as he pushed himself onto his side. His hand coming down onto a twisted iron grate. The warm wind that was bathing him was coming out of the duct he had been on as well was most of the yellow light in the area came from it. He jerked away, back paddling until he was on solid cement ground. His back pressed up against a wall as he looked up at the strange walls. They were solid, going straight up as far as the eye could see. There were patches of metal bolted over cracks, round holes with spouts and spigots that were fixed in like picture frames. 

He got up to his feet, looking round. To his left, as well as to his right, were dark shadows, what little light that was in the perfect square that he was in spilled into these areas showing they were hallways. Swallowing, he put his hand on the wall, he closed his eyes hoping that this would all go away, that it was just another nightmare. He would wake up or his body would go mindless and move on it’s own… 

Kili flexed his fingers, it seemed he was in full control of his body. He could feel the rough texture of the cement, the coldness of it, it twisted his stomach. He could smell a strange tange, like hot metal and burnt oils in the air. His heart fluttered to life, pounding harder with each beat as the heat started to register on his skin. He ran a hand over his face, feeling small beads of sweat. 

This had to be a dream. It had to be.

A deep rumbling caught his attention. It rippled to the left, vibrating through the walls as it steadily got louder. He pulled away from the wall, stepping back over the grate he had woken on. There was a terrible sound, a thunderous boom as the grate under his feet started to shake and clatter. He didn’t know what to do. 

The grate shook so hard that the hinges rattled loose, bouncing Kili off of his feet. He fell down, the hard metal biting into his knee. Then the grate was gone. Collapsed from under him, sending him to weightlessness.

1…

He watched the room of impossibly tall walls disappear. Still weightless as gravity started to pull him down.

2…

His hip slammed down onto smooth metal. His body careened out of control, sliding after the metal clang of the grate as he spiraled around the round duct that twisted down at a dangerous incline. His shirt pulled up, his skin rubbing raw on his stomach and back from the friction. 

3…

The duct ended, spitting him out into an endless abyss of black.

4…

He realized he was screaming now. The pain in his throat the only thing that pulled his attention to his desperate cries for help. 

5…

The darkness waded away, as he plummeted down into a funneled shaft. Light slowly started to bleed forth giving him sight of the walls. Red, blue, and purple vines coated the walls. If he could just maneuver over there, grab hold and slow down to a stop.

6…

He tried leaning as far as he could, getting over to the nearest wall. He pushed against the whipping wind, leaning over as far as he could. He reached out, his fingers curled as he tried to grab hold of one of the vines. His hand snapped back, the heavy feeling of bone breaking from the sudden impact from something going so fast hitting against something stationary.

7…

He screamed but he tried again. He tried grabbing once more, hands clutching onto the vines, his broken hand pierced his body with pain as he dug his nails into the vine. It slithered in his touch. Peeling the surface away in his descent. 

8…

He was slowing.

Finally coming to a stop. He gave a choked sob of relief when he could dig his feet into the vine and keep purchase. He pulled his broken hand away from the vine, looking at it as each breath burned in his lungs. His palm was red with blood, chunks of flesh hung.

He shook, as he went to wipe his bloodied hand over his shirt so he could better see the damage but stopped. His shirt was bloody… Why was his shirt bloody?

9…

He looked up at the vine as warm rain came down on him.

It wasn’t a vine…

It was a vein. He was holding onto a vein, tore it open in his descent. His breath came in short and fast, his body hyperventilating as he stared in shock.

None of this was right.

What was going on?

“Fili…”

10…

“Wake up!!!”

Kili felt his body shake. His eyes snapping open. Pain flooded his senses as he sat up screaming.

“FRERIN!!” Fili left Kili’s side, barely having managed to wake his boyfriend up. He stumbled in his run to his bedroom door, a thick cough ripping out of his lungs. 

“What’s going on?!” As usual Frerin was the first to come, Thorin close behind him as they came in. 

“I don’t know! He started screaming in his sleep, then he went rigid and silent and now- I don’t know what’s going on!!” Fili shoved his father towards the bed. “Help him!!! He’s in pain, stop it, please stop it!”

Frerin put one knee up on the edge of the bed. He looked at the way that Kili cradled his hand towards his chest. How he curled up tight, trying to protect himself.

“Kili!” Frerin reached out, taking hold of Kili’s wrists. “Kili, I need you to let me see. Okay? Just let me see.”

Kili gritted his teeth, trying to quiet himself as the pain pierced straight into his sight creating white and black blotches. He was about to pass out, but he didn’t want to sleep. He didn’t want to see it again, to feel the hot warmth of blood raining down upon him.

“Let me see,” Frerin said calmer. “Let me help.”

He looked at those soft brown eyes through the watery tears that were starting to roll down his cheeks. Frerin… he may be scary but he protected Kili. 

He was good. 

He could be trusted.

He slowly allowed the vampire to pull at his wrists. Frerin’s expression fell from concern, eyes growing wider as he swallowed.

He let go of Kili and pulled back the sheets. 

There was a strangled laugh of shock that came from Thorin. The hunter grabbed Fili when the blond out right screamed.

“It’s okay. You’ll be okay.” Frerin was grabbing Kili, heaving him up off of the bed. The feeling of wet cloth hitting dry skin was a strange one for the human to note and he knew it was the reason why they were all so upset. Frerin easily carried him, and when he turned around Kili could see the bed was nearly black with blood. “Stay awake for me, stay awake.”

As Frerin ran, he jostled Kili causing his body to hurt more. Kili couldn’t handle it any more, the pain too much as his eyes rolled back and his mind going into darkness.


	19. Chapter 19

Fili held onto his head, so much was happening around him. He could hear shouts, hear the sounds of water splashing and the squeal of tires. He shook his head as he tried to get whatever was inside out. It was talking to him, he couldn’t hear it but he could feel the pressure of the voice as it pressed against him. He felt like he was suffocating as sound after sound bombarded him. He could hear the annoying hum of flies. There was slapping sounds, skin on skin. Someone in the distance was groaning in a pitiful moan. There was laughing, a terrible laugh that all he could describe as being crooked. 

“Fili.”

He shook his head harder trying to get that pressure to go away, to get everything to shut up. He only wanted to know if Kili was going to be alright.

What happened to Kili?!

“Fili!”

He turned sharply slamming himself against the nearest surface that he could crack his head against. The sounds only intensified. A pounding sound like hammers and nails, chains, and the sickly guttural hack of a choking animal added into the putrid mix in his head. He hit himself once more against the surface, not even noticing that it was a wall that he was now pounding his head against.

He needed it to stop!

He needed to care for Kili! 

Kili… Kili…

Strong hands grabbed him around his shoulders. He was pulled away from the wall, he tried to break free, that terrible groan grew into a wail and yet he still didn’t understand that it was himself that made the noise. He was forced down onto his knees, the heavy body against his back kept firmly to him. A wrist was shoved into his mouth, forcing its way between his teeth.

“Bite!”

Fili pressed his tongue against the flesh, trying to move his head away, trying to push it out. He didn’t want to feed. He wanted to know what happened to Kili!

He was shoved harder, forced down to to his belly. His chin shoved against the floor. The back of his head was grabbed and shoved forcing him to bite, the blood rushing into his mouth eased some of the pressure in his head as something was mumbled against his ear. Familiar words, the blood he was forced to drink. It started to ease him out of the fit. Suddenly a nauseating twist slithered through him. The person on him got off and Fili was dry heaving. It hurt so bad, his stomach trying to push something out with so much force that his eyes were watering. His face was red as he tried so hard to get out whatever was moving inside him.

Thick fingers reached into his mouth, shoving into the back of his throat. He choked on the hand then he felt the slick pull of whatever was inside his body sliding along. It jerked and tried to pull away from the grip that had it. It yanked and pulled and he could feel every movement as it was slowly pulled out. 

Finally, with a slick pop whatever it was was out. His eyes grew wide as he slapped his hands over his mouth. Frerin was in front of him with a black slug like creature about the size of Fili’s forearm dangling in the air. The older vampire quickly got up and hurried to the kitchen. He threw the creature into a glass bowl then covered it with water. When Fili started to dry heave once more he cursed under his breath, he grabbed the bowl and returned to Fili’s side. 

“Just hold on, Thorin is getting Bilbo. Hold on.”

“Ki-” He hacked hard enough to splatter small specks of blood onto the floor under him. “Kili?”

“It wasn’t his blood.” Frerin rubbed at Fili’s back. “He-aw fuck, Fili push it out. Come on.”

Fili heaved as Frerin inserted his fingers once more.

 

By the time Thorin returned Fili was in tears, laying on his side, helplessly as he shook from the pain. Frerin had a few bowls of the putrid black slugs on the floor. He was cradling Fili’s face in his palms, shaking. “Fili, Fili, look at me. Baby.”

The heavy steps of his Donor made the vampire look up. “Where’s Bilbo?!”

“I’m right here.” The little man pushed around Thorin, rushing in. 

“What the hell is going on?!” Frerin shouted.

“I don’t know yet. Move,” Bilbo tried to get into the prime position to look Fili over, but Frerin was in the way. “Frerin, I need you to let me work.”

Thorin grabbed the vampire. He took him to the bathroom where Kili had been left in a hurry, he was laying in the bathtub, with only his sleeping shorts on. The warm water from the shower was still raining down on him. Now that he wasn’t covered in blood it was obvious that he suffered from no wound that would cause so much blood. His knee was swollen to the size of a grapefruit as well as one of his hands. His chest and back were scraped up from friction burn.

“What’s going on?” Frerin asked once more.

Thorin went to Kili’s unconscious body, he knelt down. Leaning over he turned off the water so that he could get a better look at the college student. His sharp blue eyes took in the different injuries. He lifted up Kili’s swollen hand, he probed it finding several broken bones. He looked to the knee, touching it gingerly before swearing under his breath. 

“Shit.”

“What?”

“I think it’s a manifestation.”

“Who the fuck would… wait… who is it aimed towards?” Frerin ran a hand through his hair, black slime and blood staining his dark golden hair. Trying his damnedest to calm down. 

“From what Fili had told me, Kili’s the target. Fili’s being affected because of their connection. To be honest it’s probably the only reason Kili’s currently alive.” Thorin frowned. “Frerin… how much do you know about this boy?”

Frerin took a deep breath as he started to calm his thoughts. He could feel Bilbo’s administrations starting to work. The chaotic state of the magic that kept him alive was calming down, being soothed by the Coven Master as he worked.

“Not much. The kid is good at heart, grew up in this area, bounced from one school system to the next because he lived on the edge of both. Wants to be a writer. I didn’t have much time to look up on him.”

Thorin easily hefted Kili out of the bath. “I’ll take him to a friend. I want you to go to Bilbo’s for a while...”

He stood in front of Frerin, the two looking at each other as Thorin held Kili. This was a game changer. Before hand they had to be scared that someone may find out, now they knew it was only a matter of time before the witch that had targeted Kili would find Fili and Frerin. Thorin had to disappear with Kili. He had to essentially hide one end of the rope so that no one could follow it back to his beloved family, not until they were ready to fight back… if they could fight back. 

They had only been together for a day… a whole wretched day and now they were being torn from each other once more.

Frerin looked away, a thickness in his throat as he nodded. Thorin stepped away. 

“I’m sorry.”

“… just find us…”


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like Bifur.

Bifur was a kind sort, if not a little strange. He lived on a large chunk of land, nestled in the large mountain range that ran between Washington state and Oregon. The Blue Mountains were his home and he was fairly certain his backyard was the home of a sasquatch that didn’t know what the hell boundaries were because the bastard would ruin his shed every winter.

His home was mostly an inherited hundred acres of undeveloped land that he kept that way. His house was a single floor little thing that had two rooms and a third one that was the size of a bed. Two of those bedrooms were nothing but stacks of books, newspapers, leaflets, pamphlets from the Edwardian and Victorian eras, and even a few rare scrolls that he had… procured over his years. His kitchen was practically in his front room and his bathroom was just a toilet in a closet and a finagled pipe that ran along the ceiling and out the wall with a shower head stuck on the side of the house. 

Bifur got up from his computer, rubbing at his black and white scrubby beard as he padded down the short hallway. He was sleep deprived from several nights of only a few hours of rest. New things were popping up once more which meant someone was going to be knocking on his door soon. The midday sun was already casting long shadows from the trees and he was silently grateful that he was on the side of the mountain and not the other. He wasn’t really one for too much sun or heat.

He heard the sound of an engine as he poured a thick coffee solution that smelled a bit like old socks into a dirty mug. A bug floated up to the top that he flicked out as he went to his cupboard and dug out a bottle of rum. He heard his name called by a voice he hadn’t heard in a while. He put the rum back and grabbed the vodka. His front door was knocked down. He looked over his shoulder as he put back the vodka and reached to the very back and pulled out an aged whiskey. It was exactly who he thought it was. Though, the boy in his arms was new.

“Trade in vamp pup for a newer model?” Bifur asked as he sipped his muddy coffee.

“I need your help.” The gruff voice spoke up.

Bifur turned around, putting the whiskey on the counter as he took a gulp of the sludge he used to keep awake. He felt his throat burn causing him to clear it a few times as he pointed to the couch.

Thorin took Kili’s unconscious form to the worn, old sofa. He had to kick off a few empty pizza boxes and beer cans. Once it was cleared he laid Kili down.

Bifur sniffed, wiggling his upper lip as he put his coffee cup down. “What do you know of the boy?” 

“Not much. I only just got back a few hours before this happened, last night.”

“So you got to eat some of Frerin’s cookin’ then pass out for about an hour and then you’re in the car to get your ass over here.” Bifur surmised. He scratched at the back of his head. “Gonna have to get a hold of Bill later, get locations of your family while you do your thing.”

He grunted as he knelt down, grabbing up Kili’s swollen hand. “Let’s get a look on what you have to work off of.”

Thorin was quiet as he watched Bifur. He trusted the man with his own life. One out of a very small pool. He was also the only one who knew the location of Frerin and Fili at any given time. Thorin did not need it due to being Frerin’s Donor, but it showed how much trust he had in Bifur.

The grizzled mountain man ran his fingers over swollen flesh, scanning over the rather pristine injury. He got up enough to strip Kili of his clothing, revealing friction burns on back and stomach. Angry raw wounds looking back at him as he assessed. He looked at the knee that was the size of a grapefruit. He touched it here and there, making the unconscious youth wince in his slumber.

“Well… you’ve got yourself a manifestation.” 

“My thoughts exactly.”

Bifur tilted Kili’s chin to the side, seeing the bite mark on his neck. “Fed on too… you’re boy?”

“He’s… Fili’s Donor.”

“Well, fuck me sideways.” Bifur let out a long whistle through his teeth. 

“Can you help him?”

Bifur groaned as he stood up fully. “Yep. Easy enough, but I’ll have to do some looking, if you know what I mean.”

Thorin’s eyes narrowed to slits. “Why?”

“Gotta confirm somethin’ while setting his bones. Luckily his knee isn’t as mangled as the swelling gives off, but the hand is pretty fucked, he’s still got remnants of blood staining some cracks of his which means he either had his period or he was taking a blood bath. And that means a powerful manifestation.” Bifur went back into his kitchen, shifting around in the junk drawer. He grabbed a few manuals, rubber bands, and even a meat tenderizer before he found a roll of canvas that had the handles of surgical tools sticking out of it. “If he’s really Fili’s Donor, the boy’s part of the family.”

Thorin felt the pull of his lips. He smirked at Bifur.

“Now get his ass into the shed before you leave. I gotta get sterile… and you’re fixing my door before you leave too.”

 

* * * * * *

Fili sat in the warmth of Bilbo’s home. He hung his head as he tried to absorb what was being told to him.

“Do you understand me?” Bilbo asked softly. 

Fili shook his head. No. He didn’t understand. How could he? Magic was not natural to him, none of this was natural to him! This whole situation is nothing but a mess!

“Fili. Your own magic caused the clash.” Bilbo adjusted himself in his soft chair. 

“No… no, I could never hurt Kili.”

“I know you didn’t mean any harm.”

Frerin glared at the honey haired man. “Bilbo, cut the crap, you’ve explained it in such a pussy footed way that we have no idea what you mean. You’re saying he did and did not hurt Kili. That he is and is not at fault. You forget, constantly, he’s not coven. He was never raised coven and only knows what you’ve taught him in the past two years!”

Bilbo bit his lip. “Very well… Fili. Putting this bluntly, you can’t be with Kili. Something in him is poisoning you.”

“No.”

“It’s what caused so much corruption to come out of you. Kili… Kili is literally killing you.”


	21. Chapter 21

Bifur was glad that he had recently rebuilt his shed, again. Everything was sterile and ready for use. The lights were bright, the metal table in the middle had brand new straps and the blood drainage was great. He worked soundlessly, meticulously. He cut open skin and reset bones, stitched up and splinted with little troubles. He had made sure there was enough local sedatives in Kili to keep him asleep for a few more hours as he made a small incision over Kili’s solar plexus. It was a small cut, something that would easily heal and not leave much of a scar. He leaned forward, squinting into the red and pink tissues before he poked a finger in. He stroked a smooth area before he pulled his finger out and closed the wound. He dumped his surgical tools into a metal sink.

 

By now Thorin was starting his way on the highway. It wasn’t a smart thing to call a man that was half out of his mind with worry while he was racing down the highway, but if Thorin Oakenshield crashed and killed himself that was his own damn fault.

 

Bifur grabbed his cell off of the table top that had been resting next to Kili’s head. He dialed a well known number and waited.

 

Thorin had been an hour’s worth of distance away when his cell rang. He had it mounted on his dashboard and quickly tapped it to answer on speaker phone.

 

“What did you find out?” Thorin asked.

 

“You’re little pup is a wight.” Bifur’s voice said over the phone.

 

Thorin slammed on his brakes, the vehicle swerved nearly slamming into an SUV that was passing. The horn honked loudly as the driver sped past leaving Thorin alone on the freeway. His eyes were wide as he stared at the phone.

 

“You didn’t die, that’s good.” Bifur dug around for a cigarette in a drawer. “But like I said, our new recruit is a wight.”

 

“He’s…” Thorin swallowed, slowly relaxing his white knuckled grip on his steering wheel.

 

“Just like you.” Bifur found a cigarette, he struck a match and lit it. He let out a long breath while waving out the match. He went to a window and opened it to let out his smoke. “You know what this means.”

 

Thorin slammed his foot onto the gas pedal, he yanked the steering wheel to the side. He bounced in his seat as he ran over the cement medium. “You call Bilblo yet?”

 

“Bill? Nah, thought you wanted to hear it first. Want me to call Bill or you do it?”

 

Thorin quickly hung up and Bifur scratched his beard looking sideways at Kili’s still figure. “Guess you will then,” he said to the silent room.

 

He took another drag from his cigarette before he put it out. He went over to the table and lifted up Kili as best as he could. He grunted and groaned, his body wasn’t what it used to be. Carrying others was not something he worked diligently on. But he did manage to get Kili inside and back onto the couch. He straightened out, back popping. He took off his apron that was stained with a some blood and different disinfectant fluids. He felt the cool breeze of the afternoon drift between his legs. Bifur took a moment to think about if he really wanted to put clothing on or not, but decided he at least needed underwear or he would freak out the new kid.

  
  
  


*     *     *     *    *

  
  


Fili laid on his side, staring out the window. His head was pillowed in Frerin’s lap, his hair being stroked as he tried to keep his emotions in check. Any time he started to feel anything now it just twisted his insides like a wrung out rag and more black slugs were thrown up. The more Bilbo helped him the more he found it to be a curse. His current fever, his coughing, all of it a result from his own magic convulsing. It was injured and made him sick. Injured because of Kili, because he had been around the person he was supposed to have beside him for the rest of his life, his beloved Donor.

 

“I won’t let him go.” Fili whispered against his father’s thigh.

 

“I don’t expect you to.” Frerin pressed his lips together before they could quiver.

 

Why couldn’t Fili just have a good life? He was such a sweet creature that deserved happiness. Instead fate had sinister plans for him, beating at him as if to break the purest being upon the earth. Cursing him those terrible birth parents, giving him magic, making him hide for his life, and now this…

 

He lifted up Fili’s head before adjusting himself. His wiggling barely noticed besides a creak of the floorboards as Frerin settled in front of his son on the floor. He looked into those hurt, blue eyes. Fingers tucked a lock of hair behind an ear. No matter how old Fili was, to Frerin he was still that little boy sitting on the polished bench. He was still the child that was missing a few teeth and loved to talk his ear off.

 

He gripped Fili’s face making the other look to him. His eyes hard, showing a glimmer of his old self.  “You listen to me. I will **not** let this be the way things end. You’re my, _son_ , and if I have to burn the world for you to be happy, then so be it.”

 

“Daddy.”

 

Fili grabbed onto Frerin, tears falling from his eyes as he buried his face into the scruffy neck of the one person he knew he would always be safe with.

  
Why couldn’t they just be happy?


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try to clarify the ages in the time line;
> 
> Fili meeting Frerin - age 5
> 
> Frerin adopting Fili - age 7-8
> 
> Fili meeting Dis - 12ish
> 
> Dis gifting magic - 13ish
> 
> Shit hits the fan from here on out.
> 
> Fili is currently age 30 - 31
> 
> Kili is currently age 23-24.
> 
> Hope this helps.

***** 25 years ago *****

The boy’s legs not able to touch the floor, sad and alone. Frerin had been in and out of offices all day, doing daily duties between his long lessons. It was a pain in the ass to be the youngest Keeper at the age of 16, he had to not only attend Keeper business but attend school at the same time with private lessons and tutors. It ate up all his night. He often found himself envious and short tempered because he wanted to hang out with his friends, get a pint of blood and just goof off like a normal teen. But his parents didn’t care for that, no, no, they wanted him to achieve something they never could. Both were natural born but Frerin, oh he was a sacred high born.

 

He threw another door open as he was late for a class that was being held in one of the many rooms of the Gondor Courthouse. At least he didn’t have to go across town to a local community college or high school to attend classes, it saved him what little time he had to just rent out one of the unused court rooms and have a class there.  

 

The door banged as he trudged forward, barely noticing the blond child sitting quietly in the lobby as he ran. His footsteps echoing off the high vaulted ceiling.

 

One class after another, papers and lessons, work and shadowing his elders to know the rungs of the politics, he ran in and out of rooms and dashed through the lobby. Each time he passed he saw the boy sitting there, head bowed and simply waiting. It wasn’t until it was well after dawn that he was done with his own things. Tired and ragged and very much ready to go home and drink until his stomach was about to burst. He was so thirsty. He shut the door behind him waving a hand to the desk clerk that micro managed room appointments of the building. He pulled his backpack over his shoulder and stopped as a smell hit him. It was a disgusting smell, ripe but airy as if it had been there for a while. He sniffed the air a few times before realizing it was coming from the quiet boy. Had that boy been there this whole time?

 

Now that he thought about it… the kid had been. Never moved. Just sat there like an obedient dog.

 

He dropped his bag to his side as he came over, the stench growing. It really was coming from the boy. He knelt down on one knee, his dark hair sliding over his shoulder. “Hey. Do you, um… do you need help to the bathroom?”

 

“I can’t leave.” The child said softly, looking away, completely ashamed of making a mess of himself. “Daddy said I need to stay put.”

 

Frerin frowned inwardly as he plastered a smile on his lips. “Well, I’m sure he said that so you wouldn’t go with a stranger. But I’m Frerin,” He held out a hand for Fili to take. Fili hesitated and shook his hand, leaving behind a wet residue from when he tried to pick at his dirty pants. Frerin grimaced a little but tried not to show it.

 

“F-Fili.”

 

“Well, Fili, now that we know each other’s names. We’re friends. So lets got to the bathroom, okay buddy?”

 

Fili nodded slowly, still unsure. He shifted a bit though and whimpered. “I… um… I… made a mess.”

 

Frerin pretended to be surprised. “You did?”

 

“I didn’t mean to.”

 

“I don’t think you need to worry about that. We’ll just go and get you cleaned up and we’ll take care of the mess when we’re done, okay?”

 

“I-I don’t want to leave a mess.”

 

Frerin shook his head, the kid was stubborn and most likely very embarrassed and ashamed. He dropped his bag and picked up Fili. The little boy protesting as Frerin carried him to the bathroom. He locked the door so no one else could come in, then looked around for what he could use. With a shrug he easily plucked the soap dispenser off of the wall as if it had not been bolted in.

 

Fili’s eyes grew wide at the action.

 

“What?”

 

“Y-you’re strong.”

 

Frerin grinned, while putting Fili down onto his own two feet. “Yeah, well, I’m high born. I’m nothing special.” He easily broke off the top to the locked metal lid to the dispenser to get to the soap. “Off with the dirty clothes, kiddo.”

 

Fili was a compliant little boy, did what he was told very easily. He tried to climb up onto the counter as Frerin plugged up the long sink and started to fill it with soapy water. Frerin picked Fili back up and plopped him into the water. He went to another one of the sinks and started to use it to wash Fili’s clothing as well as his own soiled shirt.

 

The dark haired vampire listened to Fili as he talked and talked and talked. About the shows he liked, about games and how he was trying to learn how to whistle. He pulled back his lips to show his missing baby teeth, one of his vampire fangs missing as well. He only went quiet when it came to his parents, which was never a good sign.

 

Once everything was clean, Frerin drained the sinks and stuck the clean clothes and Fili under the automatic dryers. The two made a game of slapping the buttons to dry out the clothing which ended up with Fili running in circles before coming back and slapping the button.

 

“Oh no! Here comes the flash!” Frerin grinned as he leaned against the wall, holding the damp clothing as Fili came bolting past.

 

Eventually the clothing dried and they got dressed.

 

“Better?” Frerin looked down at Fili.

 

“Yes.” Fili patted his shirt. “Better.Thank you.”

 

“Now, if you need to go to the bathroom, remember, that it’s okay to leave your spot to do so. Okay?”

 

“Okay.”

 

He unlocked the door. Fili’s little hand found his, small fingers stretching across his palm before sliding down and finding purchase with his fingers. He looked down to the boy, the mess of blond hair brushed against large ears.  The kid wobbled around trying not to step on cracks as they walked hand in hand. He was a sweet kid and… skinny, too skinny. Frerin frowned as he thought to himself, no kid should be left like that.

 

“Fili, when was the last time you ate?”

 

The little boy shrugged. “Dinner, last morning.”

 

Frerin made a sharp turn, away from the lobby and towards the vending machines. He padded down his pockets finding his wallet. He didn’t have much, less than enough for the bus rides for a week. He looked down at the little boy that was pointing at the refrigerated machine that had blood bottled up like human soda pop.  The little boy was licking his lips, looking like a starved street rat.

 

He pulled out his money, he would call his friends for rides. He bought the boy three bottles of blood, a bag of chips and a candy bar. He sat down in front of the vending machines, having just one bottle of blood for himself. He sipped his while Fili held a bottle with both hand and drank, some of it escaping his lips and running down his chin and neck.

 

“Hold up there, champ. You’re going to drown.” Frerin smirked.

 

Fili pulled the bottle away with a large gasp.

 

Frerin opened the bag of chips. “Here, eat some of this.”

 

The boy took the bag and sat down next to Frerin, his little legs stretched out as far as he could get them. He looked over at Frerin’s posture before fixing himself to mimic the high born.

 

They were quiet from then on until Fili was full. Frerin threw away their empty bottles and wrappers, stuffing Fili’s last untouched bottle into the boy’s pocket. Soon as they started to walk Fili grabbed his fingers again, giving another “thank you” as they walked until they got back to the area Fili had been found.

 

A janitor had been through, cleaned up the spot. There, a tall blond man held Frerin’s backpack, standing next to the bench.

 

“Daddy…” Fili said in a small voice. He stepped back and behind Frerin’s legs.

 

At the sound of the voice the man turned. “My wayword son returns.” His voice held no joy in it. He looked at Frerin, cold and calculating. “And whom are you to be with him?”

 

“Frerin Blacklock.”

 

The man’s face suddenly fell, his throat constricting with a swallow as he realized he was being uppity with a high born that was well over his own station. Someone, that even though was 16, was a Keeper.

 

“Fili tells me that he was waiting for his dad.” Frerin’s smiled in a feral way, looking like a hungry cat staring at a mouse. He ran his hand over blond hair. “He was a very good little boy for waiting all night. Wouldn’t you say?”

 

The man nodded slowly in agreement.

 

“But it would seem he was too scared to go the bathroom in worry that he would miss his father, and he didn’t have a packed lunch. I’m certain it was only a slip of the mind.” His smile pulled more on the corners of his mouth, his fangs glinting in his toothy grin.

 

Fili’s father quickly looked away.

 

Frerin patted Fili’s back, pushing him forward to his father’s side. The little boy looked up at him as he took his bag from the offending vampire.

 

“I’m certain I won’t see this happen again. Because you’re a kind, and caring father.”

 

“Of course… sir. Come along, Fili. It’s time to go home.”

 

Fili looked over his shoulder as he was pulled along by the wrist. Frerin gave him a wave, as he watched the two leave. He didn’t like the man.  Not one bit.

 

“Faramir?” He turned to the receptionist.

 

“Hmm?” The man was in the middle of gathering his stuff as the next shift was taking over.

 

“Who was that man?”

 

“Thranduil Greenleaf.” Faramir said with a loud sigh looking as if he had enough of politics. “His wife is a werewolf, or recently turned, I should say. He’s trying to get the kid in the foster system because the she-wolf won’t take ‘em. I honestly say that I feel sorry for the guy, wolf born bastard, she-wolf wife. He’s getting a lot of flack from the rest of the community.”

 

Within a blink of an eye Frerin was beside Faramir. He grabbed the back of his neck and hit his head down on the desk in front of the other receptionist.

 

“Wolf born or not that boy is one of ours.” He hissed against Faramir’s ear loud enough for the other vampire in the room to hear. “You could have taken that kid to the bathroom. You could have given him something to eat and drink but you left him there as if he was of coven bitch’s welp! I will not see this happen again. Do you understand?”

 

“Y-yes, sir!”

 

“Remember,” he let go of Faramir. Looking all the world as if nothing happened as he slung his backpack over one shoulder. “We take care of our own.” His eyes darkened as he looked from one man to the other. “But I _eat_ our own.”

 

It was the only warning he was willing to give to them. He would be Regnum some day, and he was going to make sure that the future of their kind would not have to go through racial bigotry.

 

Frerin, having spent all of his bus money, looked outside, sunlight coming through tinted windows. He put his pack down, took off his coat, and put his pack back on. He covered his head and arms with the coat. He looked back at the two receptionist and winked. Whistling Sweet Dreams, he walked out into the sunlight making the other two wince at the fact that he was walking so unprotected in the day.

 

“He’s fucking crazy.” The other receptionist said to Faramir.

 

“He’s the strongest Keeper we have.” Faramir leaned against the desk, looking pale. He was starting to sweat and felt completely terrified. “Single handedly killed a whole Coven last year.”

 

“The Seattle St. Patrick’s Massacre… That was him?”

 

“And only him.”

  
  
  
  
  


The next night Frerin made sure to pack some extra lunch, just in case. When he got to the courthouse he was greeted with the sight of Fili sitting on that polished bench once again. Beside him was a packed lunch. He even had an activity book that he got to work on.

 

“Hey buddy,” Frerin greeted.

 

“Frerin!” Fili dropped his activity book. He hopped down and ran over, stopping short of throwing himself at the other vampire. He turned and pointed to Faramir who was tacking away at a keyboard. “Mr. Faramir gave me lunch.”

 

Frerin smirked, seeing how Faramir was trying his best to not make eye contact with the Keeper. “That’s very nice of him. Look, I need to get to class. I’ll see you later, okay buddy?”

 

“O-okay.” Fili watched Frerin leave, before he silently sat on the bench once more.

 

He was alone.

 

Always alone.

  
  
  
  


Two weeks. Two fucking weeks and every day that kid was sitting on that bench. Always so fucking happy to see Frerin walk through the door, always so sad when he left.

 

Frerin tossed on his bed not able to sleep. Constantly thinking of that little boy that was being rejected by both parents and one getting sympathy from vampires like he was tricked all this time into some kind of fucking lie and Fili was some sort of conspirator. The kid was fucking five!

 

He finally threw his pillow across the room with a shout. He was a fucking teenager! He shouldn’t have to deal with the brat! He- fuck, but Fili wasn’t a brat. He was a sweet, stupidly innocent, little kid that didn’t ask for any of this. He doesn’t cause trouble and he’s compliant, mannerful, and fuck that father of his! Fuck his mom! Fuck them all… He didn’t have to raise the boy but he could at least show the kid that someone fucking cared.

 

The next night he got dressed and went to the courthouse. Fili was sitting there one more, quiet as ever.

 

“Good night, Fili.” He greeted.

 

“Frerin!” Fili jumped up like he always did and ran over, this time he did hug Frerin’s legs. “You’re early.”

 

“Because I wanted to spend time with you.” Frerin came over to the bench and sat down with Fili. “So, what’s new?”

 

“Nothing.”

 

“Nothing, nothing at all? No visits from mom, or a good day hug from your dad?”

 

Fili wrinkled his nose. “No.”

 

“What about seeing the sky when it’s day blue?”

 

“No.”

 

“How about unicorns.”

 

“Unicorns don’t exist.”

 

Frerin rubbed Fili’s back. “You’re in a bad mood, what happened?”

 

Fili shrugged a shoulder.

 

“Come on, you can tell me.”

 

“...last week was my birthday… no one cared.”

 

“Last… week.” Well shit… “I’m sorry, buddy. I didn’t know.”

 

“I know, you’re busy. You’re always busy.” Fili licked his lips. “But mom isn’t busy, daddy isn’t busy…”

 

“What did you do on your birthday?”

 

“Nothing. Can we go to the vending machines?”

 

“Sure. I’ll get you something.” It was the least he could do.

 

He took the little boy over to the vending machines and used up as much as he could spare of his money to get what Fili wanted. They sat down with all their junk food and bottles of different flavored blood between them. Fili smiled and laughed when they started to throw potato chips at each other. Frerin lunged forward and tickled the boy’s sides making him laugh and kick.

 

Finally they sat side by side, like the first day they met. Fili looking at him again and mimicking his posture.

 

The boy’s hand found Frerin’s, holding on tight. The Keeper could feel the grit from the junk food still on tiny fingers.

 

“I wish you were my dad.” Fili said softly.

 

Something broke in the dark haired vampire. Fili was already being submitted to the foster system… did he even know?

 

Frerin wrapped an arm around Fili’s shoulders and squeezed him to his side. He would have to think about it, what he would have to give up to take the kid in. But it was mighty tempting.

 

 


	23. Chapter 23

Frerin went through the sacks of clothing that Bilbo had brought in. He had learned long ago that it didn’t matter if it matched, just as long as it fit. Holes were a thing he had to get used to after he lost his position, clothing that was previously worn as he found work where he could. Bofur had been quite helpful in giving him a job over at a House, that was until some hounds found them and Bofur had to go into hiding by joining the Air Force. It was hard making ends meet, being 18 with a 7 year old son. Bofur paid him well enough, gave him a room to stay in the House. Frerin had gotten to know many of the humans and vampires that worked as blood banks for Bofur. Some were more than that, some were actual Candies and they all fussed over Fili and made him feel at home. Fili had been scared, he still remembered the little boy clinging to his leg as if he was still five. In order to get Fili off of him so he could show vampires to the rooms of the Candies or serve drinks and bus tables, Bofur had taken the lad into his office where he showed him his collection of antique toys. He would take time and show Fili how to carefully restore the devices, how to use tiny screwdrivers, how to oil gears and sew up fabric.

“You remember Bofur’s House?” Frerin asked as he tossed a shirt to the corner that was too small for either of them.

Fili was pale, barely able to move as a fever took over him. The poisonous clash of magic was wreaking havoc on his body. He huffed out a few breaths, his lips pulling into a smile. “F-first time I d-didn’t go hungry.”

“That’s because daddy loves you.” Frerin folded another shirt that would not fit. He twisted at his waist and dabbed Fili’s wet brow. “And he refuses to see his little boy go hungry, though, you have to deal with my ill tasting blood when you’re hungry and holes in worn out clothes.” 

Fili hummed, closing his eyes. Despite how much pain was throbbing through his body he was happy he had stopped throwing up the black slugs of corruption. Fili would have countered, told Frerin that his blood tasted good, as sweet as what humans described as “mother’s milk”. He would have also countered that Frerin was weak now because he gave too much of his blood to Fili and he wouldn’t feed unless it was on Thorin. Frerin had been starving himself, only able to eat raw steaks from time to time to hold the pain in his stomach back. He used to be so much stronger, but he was malnourished all because if he fed off of a human or vampire or if he went to a House they would be found. He would have protested but all that came out was a cough.

“Alright, come on.” Frerin put down what was in his hands. He slipped an arm under Fili, feeling the burn of a fever through the clothing and the spot of floor that Fili had not been able to move from. He propped Fili up against his chest, holding his wrist up to his son’s mouth.

Fili shook his head. The movement of being lifted made him feel queasy and the last thing he wanted to do was be feeding and throw up on his father. Knowing the protest well Frerin just held Fili up. He rested his cheek on top of golden hair, waiting. He hated seeing Fili sick with little more he could do than give him cold medicine with a chaser of blood to keep him fed. 

“I think the old House is still up, unoccupied… We’ll have Bilbo make some wards that we can take with us. Stay there until Kili gets better.” Frerin mused. 

“Mm, sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it, kiddo.” Frerin pressed his nose into Fili’s hair. “When your fever breaks we’ll need to leave Chewelah. Pitty, I’ll miss all the trees and the fresh air.”

He waited a bit longer before taking his wrist to his own mouth. He winced at the pain of his sharp fangs biting into his skin, deep enough to have his blood run down around his wrist. He brought it to Fili’s mouth. A blistering hot tongue and lips wrapped around the wound, drinking the only meal that he knew he could always provide. 

\---------------------

When Kili woke he felt nothing but a dizzy sensation with a dull throb that etched into his very core. He groaned, rolling his head to the side trying to will his eyes open. Or maybe they were already open, he wasn’t sure. 

“Sleeping beauty, get up.” He felt a pressure on his face repeat over and over, but it was so far away. “Shit… think I gave you too much.”

Something freezing washed over him forcing his lungs to constrict. Some of it got into his mouth forcing him to sputter and cough. His eyes opened up to a dark room that had barely any light. A man with a trimmed beard that had white and black stripes in it hovered over him. A bright light shined into his eyes suddenly.

“Yeah, you’re drugged good.”

“Wha?” Kili couldn’t even make his body sit up. All he could tell were a few sensations from pressure, to cold, and maybe even the understanding that his body was actually breathing. “Wa- a- ih?”

“You shouldn’t talk, you don’t want to bite off your own tongue. Name’s Bifur.” Bifur sat back on the floor, he wore only a pair of jeans that bunched at the ankles. “I’m an old friend of Thorin’s. Seems you’re part of the family.”

“Ammi?”

“Kid, did I not just say to not talk?” He brought a cold beer up to his lips trying to take a drink before he realized it was empty. He looked at Kili as if it was his fault that Bifur had used his own beer to wake him fully. “I’ll give you the shortest introduction you’ve ever had in your life with history. I’ve known Thorin since we were kids, we ran into some shit and he became a hunter while I stayed as an Aware. I was a doctor for a motorcycle gang that ran guns out of Cali, We’re out in the middle of no where and that’s how I like it. And I’ll be patching you up and introducing you to the full glory of this fucked up world because you’re Fili’s boy and you’re gonna have a lot to handle.”

Bifur looked around, he reached over to a discarded beer can and checked if it had anything in it. When he found it was still half full he took a swig before grimacing having swallowed down a bug.

“So, I’m gonna start you off with bed rest until you can move your jaw without risking swallowing your own tongue.” He dug into his pockets. He frowned then shoved his hand into his pants and pulled out his phone. He dialed a number. “And seeing the glaze in your eyes I think you’re about out again. Yeah, hey, Bill.” 

Bilbo had been surprised from the phone call to come so soon. He had a jolt of worry when it was Bifur. He got up from the cushy chair he had been in, “Is he?”

“Yeah, he’s doing good but gotta have the vamp pup on the line.” Bifur adjusted himself so his back was pressed up against the foot of the couch.

“R-right. So… what happened to him? Do you know?”

“Oh I know. Thorin’s on his way to get you all moving.”

“Us moving?” Bilbo paused by the doorway seeing Frerin feeding Fili. 

“You on speaker?”

Bilbo fumbled with the phone before putting it on speaker. “You’re on speaker now. Frerin, Fili, it’s Bifur.”

The two vampires turned their attention immediately to the device in Bilbo’s hand.

“Kili-” Fili started up.

“Is fine, kiddo. But I think there’s gonna be some complications between you and him.” Bifur moved his phone from his ear and put it on speaker as well. He knew what a bond between vampire and Donor was like. He had seen Thorin’s withdrawal, helped him through them. They had a crash course of learning how even the voice of the connected pair helped ease the chaos that waded in. 

He wiggled the phone in front of Kili. “Say hi to your wife.”

Kili made an arrangement of sounds that couldn’t be classified as human.

“There you go, now you have evidence he’s alive. So,” he adjusted himself before he stuck a hand between the couch cushions making Kili groan. “We got a real special case here my little duckies. It would seem that we’ve had a Coven targeting him for a while. Been feeding him magic slowly over a long period of time.”

He ran his hand around the bed of the couch before pulling out a half torn cigarette. He put it between his lips before letting out a long sigh, he didn’t have anything to light it with. Then he remembered the book of matches in his pocket. He pulled it out and struck the last match, lighting his cigarette. 

“That would explain the corruption.” Bilbo said.

“Fili got screwed over?”

“Big time. He’s still recovering. It’s got to be a clash of two magics that are not compatible. It would rip open the well and cause the corruption.”

“Our only problem is that it’s a strong magic and the disturbance will alert the coven that’s casting the spell.”

“Which is why Thorin is moving all of us.” Bilbo surmised. 

“Bingo. After you’re settle and I’ll get a hold of you. Frerin knows the drill.”

“But Kili.” Fili’s voice was weak, his body worn out and barely holding onto consciousness.

“Is currently passed out and drooling. I’ll take care of him. I’ll look into how to detox him so it doesn’t kill the two of you when you meet again…… Fili, it’ll be a long time.”

“Why?”

“Ask Thorin when he shows up. You vamps stay safe. Bill, I need to talk to you privately.”

Bilbo switched it off of speaker phone, putting it up to his ear. “Yeah?”

“What covens are around there?”

“Mine, um… we have a few wizards but none that I know of besides that.”

“Find a wizard, find out who is hiding under your radar. He’s been fed magic for a long, long time. That means to me that it’s a local, someone he grew up with. Find out who and fucking stay away from them.”

“I… have a good idea who it is. Fili mentioned once to me that Kili was having dreams of a doll house, being in it.”

“Shhhiiit!” Bifur rubbed a hand over his face. 

“Bifur… I can’t protect them against that…”

“None of us can, Bilbo. None of us can.”


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry that this one is boring

Bilbo was quick in packing a bag of clothing. He sat down with Frerin, quickly sorting through the bags of second hand clothing for just enough for the two vampires to have one change of clothing. Fili had fallen asleep, whimpering in the pains of fever. Bilbo stuffed the changes of clothing into a used backpack, he thrusted it into Frerin’s hands.

“Candles in the bathroom, cans of food from the pantry.” He said quickly.

While the vampire ran off to do what he was told Bilbo bolted to his back room. He threw open the door, looking over the racks of drying plants that hung from the ceiling and the different potted plants. There was a wooden bowl of different colored rocks that he grabbed and dumped into his bag. He grabbed handfuls of different plants, stuffing them into different pockets of his duffel. He went to a closet where there were many vials of different kinds of amber liquids. Hurriedly he collected all that he could carry. 

He stopped looking at his altar. It stood with a light green cloth covering a small table, many burnt candles lined a bronze bowl that was studded with white crystals on the bottom. A sacred knife sat in front of it, the very knife he used to teach Fili how to eliminate corruption that crawled into reality. He grabbed the knife, fixing it to his belt. He tugged down his shirt trying to cover it.

“Frerin? You done?” He called out over his shoulder.

Frerin was in the kitchen looking through drawers. He yanked them out, spilling the contents onto the floor when he didn’t find what he was looking for. “Almost!”

He stuffed some spoons into his pockets, then grabbed a small pot and a small pan. Finally he found a bundle of twine. He tied the pot and pan onto his back pack. and pocketed the twine making a large bump in his pants. He slung on the pack, then ran back to his son. He squatted down, sliding a hand under Fili’s legs, then under his back. With a bit of effort he lifted up the grown man. He felt a little dizzy, having fed Fili and now carrying him. He wasn’t light, not with his full muscled body and dead weight. He would have to push through it though, Thorin would be there any moment and if not then his Donor would find him. They spent too much time settled in one place and they had to leave. Especially after what Bifur had told them.

“Done!” Frerin shouted as he carried Fili to the back door.

Bilbo lit his altar candles. He tipped a few onto the floor, placed a few more under the curtains. He waited until the flames started to lick up the light fabric before he grabbed his duffel and headed out. He was not going to allow any coven other than his own have his magic, or know how he used it. 

The two walked around the house, disappearing into the woods. Bilbo would stand on his tippy toes to try to get branches out of Frerin’s way. 

“I’ll lead you to the main road, then I have to leave you for a while. I need to find someone that might be able to help.” Bilbo was already panting, practically running to keep up with Frerin’s long legged stride. “I won’t know where you’ll be going, so I’ll get a hold of Bifur when I’m done.”

“How bad do you think this is?” Frerin ducked down from a branch that was too high for Bilbo to hold up for him. 

“Honestly?”

“I need the full truth if I’m going to protect him, Bilbo.”

“...I think it’s the Collective.”

“The Collective?” Frerin frowned. In his studies back when he was a Keeper he had heard of them, a raising group of witches that were taking over other covens to strengthen their own magical base. “How big are they now?”

“Big.” Bilbo tripped over a stone. He cursed under his breathe, having to fully run to catch up with the vampire. “They’ve landlocked half of the covens in the country. They’re having a hard time getting into the Inland Northwest because we’re few and far between with magic that isn’t known by many. We’re not easily overturned. And I’m praying that the friend I’ll be seeing will tell me otherwise, but I think the Collective has targeted Kili in hopes to turn him into a witch. I’m not sure why they would do it slowly like this unless they really wanted to solidify their hold on him, but-”

“Him being Fili’s Donor throws a wrench in their gears.”

“More than a wrench. If it was someone I was trying to bring into my coven, I would feel like you’re trying to pull apart the whole machine. They’re going to used that dispersing magic to try to track Kili down, after that they’ll find what caused the disruption and track that down to Fili. Bifur needs to pull as much magic out of Kili as fast as possible. Until he gets the last bit out, you gotta keep on the move.” Bilbo pushed through some brambles, stepping onto a river of dark cement. “Here we go.” He pointed to his left. “Go that way for as long as you can. It’ll turn into dirt after a few miles that’ll go into the mountains. You’ll run across a few logging camps, but no real houses. A werewolf pack lives on the other side so keep an eye out.”

“Thank you… for everything Bilbo.”

The small witch smiled softly. “Soon as Fili became part of my coven you both became family. You don’t need to thank me.”

Frerin swallowed, a strange feeling pulling at his stomach. _You’re not going to see him again. Not like this._

He looked away from Bilbo. He knew that voice well, the voice that whispered to him in his dreams and deep within his instincts. It never lied to him, never steered him wrong.

He started to walk down the road, adjusting Fili as best as he could. 

He wouldn’t see Bilbo again and he couldn’t bring himself to say goodbye.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *worried look*

Kili still wasn’t exactly sure what was going on. He had woken up about an hour ago from what was probably the heaviest drug dosage that a human could live through. His splinted knee throbbed and his hand was no better. The guy who was called Bifur was a blunt sort. He didn’t like lies, or spin a tale, he liked things simple and fair. He was also had the house care of a frat boy after a party binge. It didn’t help that Kili was naked on a grummy couch with a dish cloth thrown over his groin for privacy.

“Where’s Fili?” Kili asked for the umpteenth time since he was coherent enough to talk.

“Kid, you’re starting to get on my nerves.” Bifur was picking up trash and stuffing it into a large garbage bag. 

“I want to know where he is!!” 

“And I want you to stop focusing on how far away he is from you and start thinking!” Bifur threw a can into the bag making a loud sound as it hit a beer bottle. “Until I detox you then not even I can know where the vamp is.”

“Don’t call him that!”

“Don’t call him what he is? You got to be kidding me.”

“You’re using it as racial slang. Don’t.”

Bifur rolled his eyes up towards the ceiling. He silently prayed that it was the start of the withdrawals of being away from the vampire. He put his trash bag down, pulled up a dusty looking chair and sat on it. “Okay, lets get it all out.”

“Get what out?” Kili glared.

“You’re going to start pissing and moaning about how you can’t stand being away from him. How you need to feel him. You’re going to start rubbing at your neck like a baby on his mother’s tit and obsessing over where he is. After that, you’ll start screaming because brain is going to try to throw you into delusions. It’s all apart of being separated from him but you’re going to have to suck it up so you can heal and I can teach you how to protect him. But before the delusions hit I would like to get some studying into your noggin. So, let’s hear all the pissing and moaning.”

“You’re an asshole.”

“I’m glad you realized that more than just you has one.”

Kili’s lip curled in a snarl. “You know what, fuck you! You don’t know me and so far all I’ve gotten out of you is half answers. Why the hell am I even here?! Thorin just grabbed me and threw me at you! I don’t know him, I don’t know you. Thorin doesn’t like me, so far as I know this is his first step to fucking erase me off of the face of the earth because I’m dating Fili! So you know what? If you’re going to kill me, then do it already because I rather have it done than live a life in fear and intimidation. I won’t be used as a fucking chip to control Fili, and I won’t let you or Thorin -for that matter- fucking use him against me!”

Bifir’s frown slowly pulled into a smile. “You got spirit. Good, keep it healthy because something is coming and it’s going to crush everything and all you’ll have is that spirit left.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“You’re a wight.”

“What is that?”

“Hard to explain… best way to discribe it is through a myth; a long time ago, when the moon wasn’t even born, the first human was made. An angel was allowed to push the soul into that human, she slipped her thumb over the bone in his chest leaving a mark, making him divine. Other humans were made, none to be touched like the first. The divinity in him separated him from all others, making him a favorite amongst god and the angels. He was gifted with strength, intelligences, blessed with luck and a sound mind. They named him Wight the first human.”

“I thought it was Adam.”

“Fuck that new age crap. Christianity is only a babe compared to the beliefs of the world. The bible has been rewritten so many times in so many different languages that half of it is nonsense and contradictions. Sonny, if you want to know the truth, look at the older stuff.”

Kili rubbed at his head with his good hand. “What does this have to do with me?”

“Everything, a wight is just that, a divinely touched human. A wight is the only one that can become a hunter. You don’t have the human drive to travel in packs, you don’t want to be around a crowd and do what a crowd does. You’re smart so you want to know the truth, you don’t want to feel fear so you work past it. You probably have excellent reflexes, never broken a bone in your body until now. You get straight A’s if you put a poor amount of effort into your studies but you really don’t care enough so you’re grades are averaged because you want to see what’s really out in the world.”

The college student frowned. Bifur was hitting every nail on the head. He watched the older man lean forward. Bifur shuffled his feet out farther apart, resting his elbows on his knees. He rubbed his thick fingers together. He was trying to figure out how to word everything more delicately, it wasn’t within his nature to do so but he knew that this whole situation needed to be understood. Nothing could be skipped, nothing could be left untouched. Lives of good creatures were at stake, and the course of their reality as well.

When he spoke again it was slow, his tone showing he was serious and not looking for an argument. “How much do you know?”

Kili pressed his lips together trying to hold back a shout, another demand to know where Fili was. It was eating at him, a pull at the back of his whole being like an insistent child telling him over and over again that he was so far away from his beloved soulmate. He rubbed at his eyes trying to push that feeling back. 

“Vampire social structure, that’s it.”

“Kid, you’ve got a lot to learn and we’re going to have to get along so you can learn it all while your bones mend. Then, I’ll put you through training.”

“Training?”

“To keep Fili safe, you’re going to have to learn how to kill.”

\------------------------------

Thorin found Frerin, staggering along a dirt road that was barely large enough for his car to fit on. His headlights caught on the two blonds, his instincts knowing how far Frerin was from him. The hunter threw the gear into park and set the emergency brake. 

He dropped out of the SUV with a heavy steps on the dry dirt. He took a few long strides. His hands came to Frerin’s face.

“Are you alright?”

The vampire was so pale, shaking from exhaust.

Frerin nodded, hefting Fili’s limp form. “I’m alright. Fili’s fever broke after twilight, and, uh, I uh…” He looked around, seeming confused as to where he was.

“Frerin?”

“Can you take Fili? I’m a little tired.”

Thorin was quick to aid his husband, pulling Fili from his arms. His mouth pulled into a deep scowl when he felt the sticky residue on the back of Fili’s shirt. He couldn’t see, not with the stark contrast of light and shadow.

“Let’s get you in the car.”

Frerin opened the back door for Thorin to slip Fili into the back seat. Soon as Fili was down the hunter turned and grabbed Frerin’s wrist. He pulled him around to the headlights looking at the blood encrusted bracelets that Frerin used to hide his scars. Fresh blood oozed out over dried rivets. His eyes widened.

“How long have you been bleeding like this?”

The vampire shook his head. “Don’t know. Couldn’t bandage it, I was feeding Fili when Bifur called and we had to leave.”

Thorin grabbed Frerin by the arm and gave him a shake. “You could have spent a few seconds to wrap it!”

“Thorin, I’m fine. I just need to sleep.”

“You also need to eat.”

The blond gave a half hearted smirk, he reached up and touched Thorin’s beard. “Is that an offer?”

“It’s a demand.” 

Thorin yanked Frerin flush up against his body, claiming his mouth with a heated kiss. Frerin lips vibrated with a moan, opening up to taste tongue and teeth. He pushed at his Donor trapping him against the hood of the car, blocking off one of the headlights. Thorin’s hands snaked around the blond’s hips, grabbing at the well sculpted ass and pressing an all too hard bulge against his hip. Ferin pulled back enough to dig out the ball of kitchen twine, setting it on the hood of the car. 

“I’m not even going to ask.”

“Unless you want to use it.” Frerin whispered against Thorin’s lips.

“Kinky bitch.” The hunter claimed another hungry kiss. This time when he broke the kiss he tilted his head to the side, presenting his neck.

The sharp pain of fangs inserting into his flesh was something he found that he rather enjoyed. It was quick and left a feeling of intimacy beyond anything else. He was allowing Frerin to do this, only Frerin. He had never given his blood to any other, not even Fili. It was something he had decided on when he found himself enchanted by the beautiful vampire. Unable to stop thinking about his eyes, desperate to hear his voice. He had a craving to taste his lips before Frerin even knew who Thorin was. It was all part of being his Donor, the forbidden attraction to want to give and take like a demon of greed. 

His fingers pulled up Frerin’s tucked in shirt, desperate to touch skin as he felt his cock start to swell. His vampire’s fangs pulled out of his skin, hot lips and tongue sealing over the area to catch every drop that came out of the punctures. 

He rocked forward, rubbing his hips against his lover’s. Frerin gave a helpless sound against Thorin’s neck, rolling his hips forward in response. They had not touched each other like this in so long. Any little bit made them both dizzy and pleading for more. The years spent far from one another had been painful as if someone had snipped their sinew and jabbed needles into their bones. Hearing each other’s voices helped sooth a balm over that pain but it was not enough to survive off of.

Frerin thrust his hand down the front of Thorin’s pants, crusty blood flaking as his bracelets were forced to move and tear open scabs. His fingers clasped around Thorin’s cock, holding onto it tightly as he pumped. 

The hunter moaned, his baritone voice vibrating down into his chest. He slipped his hand into the back of Frerin’s pants, pressing a finger between cheeks to rub at the muscled pucker. It was the push that he wanted. Frerin grabbed the front of Thorin’s pants and with little effort he popped the button and tore the zipper apart, he did the same to his own in turn as he panted against his Donor’s neck. He pressed hard against the human, their flushed cocks now able to slot against each other as he rocked against him.

Thorin’s breath hitched, his head falling back as he continued to massage Frerin’s entrance. The vampire grabbed hold of his coat, clinging onto him as he licked up the trail of blood going down his throat as they rutted.

At this point they didn’t need words, only needed to feel. To fill in that gap that had been gouged between them due to distance. 

Thorin came first, a wordless scream as his seed spilled over their cocks and shirts. Frerin smeared blood over his cheek as he rubbed against Thorin’s neck, whimpering. Thorin rocked against him, pulling him impossibly closer, tipping his husband over the edge.

They panted, clinging onto each other. 

_...You’re not going to be able to feed like this again._

Frerin closed his eyes, tight. He refused to believe the voice now. He licked at Thorin’s neck, before drinking just a bit more blood. Thorin was his Donor, he would never leave him… never.


	26. A Turn For The Worse

Something was wrong with Frerin, Thorin could feel it. It was beyond the caution of the worry of their situation. It was palpable, almost tangible. The vampire communicated less, his eyes shifting constantly as if something was right on their backs, hiding in the shadows. Several times he found his husband distancing himself when they took a break in driving. He would walk off and stand still, observing as if he could see or hear the twitch of ears listening in the dark. 

Thorin made sure to make him feed when he could manage it without getting too dizzy. In turn Frerin would easily feed Fili, soothing a hand over golden hair as if the man was nothing but a babe as he sucked on Frerin’s wrist. He would whisper into Fili’s ear, trying to keep him grounded as the withdrawals of being away from the donor started to take effect. The fever that plagued Fili now was that of the separation. A few times his legs had buckled under him when taking a short walk at a rest stop, his muscles cramping throughout his body, forcing his limbs to twist and convulse. Frerin fed Fili more when this happened. His strong blood helped give him the strength he needed, but the connection through the magic would allow Frerin to ease his own willpower into his son, enough to help him through his fits.

Watching it, reminded him of when he left to the air force. He had to disappear for a while, hunkered down at Bifur’s as he suffered. Fili would call them, tell them what he had to do to keep Frerin from ripping his own face off. It had been too much of a responsibility to place on the shoulders of a young man, barely 22. But it had to be done. Thorin had seen movement in those he considered an enemy. And Thorin? What could he do?

He moved them along, stopped when they needed it, and provided what he could. Medicine, bandages, blood, food, and now he was in the store buying clothing as quickly as he could. He didn’t care that he was in a Good Will second hand shop, he grabbed what he knew would fit, snagged a half assembled sewing kit and a few sturdy coats and was now grinding his teeth as he waited in line. He had already spent too long in one spot. Driving around in circles, hopping around everywhere in the Inland NorthWest, diving to the coast and then down to the edge of California all the while waiting for Bifur to contact him with information so he could properly make a decision as to where they should go. It didn’t help that he could hear Fili screaming in ebbing waves from inside the store. People were quiet, skittish about it setting the whole place on edge. 

Someone came in a minute ago on a tirade on how someone mentally ill should never be restrained in the back seat. Restraint was not something Frerin and Thorin liked to do but sometimes it was called for, they were doing the best they could. It was tiring, draining of all energy and all Frerin and Thorin could do was sleep when Fili finally thrashed enough for them to pass out. The pure lack of energy made them irritable towards each other, but when they could, they took the time to hold hands. To apologize for harsh words and share a few kisses or a long hug. Most frustrating was the fact that their strain was affecting their connection. Frerin’s withdraw from him as well as the push and pull of Fili’s needs it made it hard for Thorin to tell when Frerin needed his help. The levels of the vampire were so hyped up that Thorin couldn’t discern one thing from another. It made him worried. He didn’t know what his husband was thinking, now he couldn’t tell what he was feeling.

This whole situation was a nightmare.

Thorin rubbed at his neck as he stepped up in line. He silently prayed that Bifur would get a hold of them. He could hear another piercing scream come from outside when someone came into the shop. He inwardly winced. 

When he got to the cash register he threw his stuff down and scowled. The cashier was pleasant and instantly launched into a conversation which pushed Thorin to snap out. “I don’t want to talk, just ring me up and get me out the door as fast as possible.”

He grabbed his sack after his purchase and took long strides out the door. 

Soon as the door was opened he was hit with a wall of muggy heat and the punctuating screams that traveled beyond the parking lot. His heart seized as he got closer to his SUV that rocked. His pace quickened with each step until he was in a run. The closer he got the more he could see; a door open, Frerin leaning in with his head ducked down, his hands and forearms protected his and Fili’s heads and faces as the younger vampire thrashed. In Fili’s thrashing he had torn parts of the upholstery out. The window at his feet had a webbed crack, threatening to give. Thorin could smell the taint of blood by the time he got to the door. Frerin’s shirt had been pulled off and wadded up to stuff into Fili’s mouth. There were bite and claw marks that were freely bleeding down Frerin’s neck and shoulder. The red stained and matted his golden hair to his skin. There were bits of flesh crammed into Fili’s broken back nails, strands of hair stuck in the gore.

But there was something wrong. Frerin was too relaxed, his weight fully placed on his son. 

“Frerin?!” Thorin shouted over the screams of the youngest member of their little family.

He tried to pull his husband off of Fili but Fili’s flailing hand struck him across the jaw so hard he felt it pop to the side. Still, he pushed forward, past the fingers that grabbed hold of his hair, ripping and pulling. He grabbed hold of Frerin shoulder and waist and pulled him back. The shirt that had been held in place was dragged out from their movements freeing Fili’s fangs that bit at anything that came within reach. His jaws snapped at Frerin’s loose hair, as he was pulled back, more of his hair being pulled out with a vicious yank of Fili’s head as hei twisted in the back seat with an animalistic garbled sound of a hiss and scream, much like a flailing cat in the middle of a fight. 

Frerin’s dead weight was hard to handle as he slumped him back against his chest. Thorin put his right leg forward, sitting Frerin on his thigh. There was a dull thwacking sound followed by the shattering of glass as Fili’s heel smashed into window breaking it completely. He grabbed hold of the back of the bench seat and ripped pulling half of the upholstery off along with part of the packed foam. 

Thorin pulled back fully, slamming the door closed as the SUV rocked. He leaned against it, slowly sliding down to the cracked cement. He cradled Frerin to him, adjusting him slowly to look at the wounds.

A mouthful had been taken out of the round edge of his shoulder, some of the clawed wounds were so deep that he could see the movement of tendon when he continued to adjust Frerin. He hooked bloodied locks of hair with his thumb, slowly pulling it back from the neck. 

His chin wrinkled as his bottom lip quivered. The side of his neck looked like bloodied bacon ripped into shreds. He pulled off his jacket and wadded it up. He slipped it under Frerin’s head and rested his husband on the ground. Thorin hurried to his feet and ran to the back of the vehicle. He opened the back and managed to grab the first aid kit that he had picked up the day after he found Frerin carrying Fili in the woods.

He slammed the back gate before a chunk of the interior was thrown in his direction. He hurried back to Frerin’s side, hurriedly opening the first aid kit. His hands shook as he saw blood start to drip from the rumpled edges of his coat and onto the ground.

He was air force trained. He was skilled in combat. He had hunted goblins, gremlins, witches, vampires, werewolves, yeti, swamp monsters and more things that went bump in the night than folklore even knew existed. But here he was, for the first time in his life, scared down to his bones.

“Frerin, Frerin, wake up.” Thorin heard himself saying as he ripped open packets of gauze. “Baby, you gotta wake up for me.”

He pressed the gauze up against Frerin’s neck. he applied as much pressure as he could without choking. With his free hand he gently slapped at Frerin’s cheek. “Wake up, honey, wake up.”

He was unresponsive, the only thing keeping Thorin from screaming and crying was the fact that Frerin still had warmth to his skin. 

Blood seeped between his fingers making him gather a new bunch of gauze that he pushed against the wound. He heard someone behind him, then another and another. A crowd gathering slowly as people looked to see what was the matter. One person was shouting around for help, murmurs of “oh my god” and “oh no, what happened?” were lost to Fili’s screams.

“I called 911!” Someone else said to Thorin’s deaf ears. He was focused on his husband, trying to stop the bleeding, trying to get him to respond.

“Frerin, Frerin, you have to move. You have to wake up.” He heard himself mumbling.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was listening [to this song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wDqPatQhRsw) while writing. Best song to listen to while reading.

Thorin sat beside the hospital bed. His head bowed as he listened to the bustle of the hospital. People walked around the halls, clattering equipment, talking much too loud, but all of it was silent besides the slow, methodical beeping of the machines that monitored the love of his life. 

_“Are you his family?”_

The hunter squeezed his eyes closed, fingers finding Frerin’s. A large white clip was placed on his finger, a tube in the back of his hand feed him a slow feed of saline. 

_“I am.” Thorin replied to the doctor. “He’s my husband.”_

_The doctor glanced up at him and opened his mouth. Before he could get out a word Thorin bit out, “It’s a legal marriage and before you even think that there is a risk of some disease or risk of HIV or AIDS you best think twice.”_

_The doctor sniffed, wiggling his nose a bit. He cleared his throat._

Thorin gathered Frerin’s hand. He forced his eyes open. He had to take several breaths looking at Frerin’s face, framed with chestnut brown hair. He choked on the sound that wanted to escape, keeping it in his throat. He turned his head once more, lowering it to press Frerin’s thumb against his brow. 

_“Did you know?”_

_Thorin felt as if his lungs were being squeezed. His eyes stinging with tears from the news. He shook his head. “I um… I’ve been overseas, in the air force for,” He heaved a sigh, “For over ten years. Didn’t get much chance for leave.”_

_“I’m sorry… We’ll try to make him as comfortable as we can.”_

Trembling lips pressed against limp fingers. If it wasn’t for the pressure of the drops that would hit the side of his nose, he wouldn’t have even noticed he was crying. 

With a long sniff he sat up. He reached over stroking silken hair, while a thumb rubbed over Frerin’s. 

“Please… please…” He whispered. No more could come out, only the begging for anything and everything. He heard his cell phone ring, the chime one assigned to Bifur. He let it ring, not hearing it as he pleaded to an empty room. 

Frerin moved ever so slightly, leaning into Thorin's touch. The human looked at him, tears in his eyes, teeth gritted as he looked at the creature he loved.

The vampire pulled as much strength as he could, lifting his hand to gently caress Thorin's face. His thumb dragging weakly through his beard. The movement broke the damn. A terrible sob pulled from the human. 

"Why didn't you tell me?" Thorin's voice wavered with pain as hot tears dripped off his chin. He sniffled. "I would have left sooner."

He got a gentle expression in return. Frerin's voice so low that he could barely hear it. "We both know I was living on borrowed time."

"And we should have spent it together, not me watching every move of Fili's birth father!"

"Thorin," Frerin shushed softly. "Just close your eyes... you'll be alright... and I know Fili will be safe with you." His mouth twitched going from frown to strained smile as his own eyes stung. His chest feeling constricted. He knew he was dying, he could feel the magic that was keeping him alive slipping away. The madness created by Fili's withdrawal making him unable to control himself and what he does. He was sapping the gift he had give to Frerin all those years ago. He also knew he was malnourished being away from Thorin for so long, for having to eat human food and not feed on blood as he should have been. It was a miracle he lived as long as he had. 

Thorin put his hand over Frerin's, pressing his wet cheek into that palm. "I won't let you go."

Frerin's grip loosened. He had fallen back asleep leaving Thorin to a room deathly quiet to his ears. 

"I won't." He vowed. "I won't let you go like this. I won't."

 

\--------------------------------------------  
15 years ago  
\--------------------------------------------

“It’s still odd.” Frerin frowned into the mirror. “But being a blond suits me.”

“I’m sorry… I…”

“Sorry for what?” Frerin pushed himself away from tiny bathroom sink. He walked the small distance to the bed that Fili was sitting on. He sat down, heavily, making the both of them bounce. The small motel room they were renting was quiet, which was easy to achieve when you were in the middle of no where and one out of two guests.

Fili’s chin wrinkled, brows drawing together as the fight was still too fresh in memory. Frerin’s body still held stitches that seeped and scabbed, his body moved with horrid jerks like a puppet being moved by string from a spider. When he slept he whimpered and moaned from the pain in his sleep. 

The young vampire shook his head as his father placed a hand on his back. 

“None of that was your fault. None of it.”

“If I just left Dis alone… If I had just did what you told me-”

“Fili… What if’s don’t fix the past. We need to learn from them, make that regret into a strength so we won’t fail again.” Frerin rubbed Fili’s back. “Besides, I rather be alive here with you, knowing you’re safe and sound than being fed to an alligator in that swamp and know that they got a hold of you.”

“But dad…”

“Fili.” Frerin turned his son’s face so they can look at each other. Fili’s eyes were moist with tears. “I will burn the world for you. I will not regret for one moment giving it my all to keep you free. and alive.”

The young teen pushed his face under Frerin’s chin, his arms wrapping around him as gently as he could manage. A kiss was pressed to the top of his head as his back was stroked. 

“I’ll never let you go.” Fili whispered. “I love you, dad.”

“I love you too.” Frerin kissed Fili’s head again. _I won’t let the shadows put out your light, son._

It was two weeks after that when they got attacked by a hound. She threw herself in a surprise attack, the brass knuckles she beat into Fili’s side and back was so hard it broke some of his ribs. The boy was pinned to the ground, crying in pain. Frerin moved quickly, flanking her. He grabbed the back of her neck, the surprise of his strength and speed placed a fear in her making her stiffen her whole body. It seemed so easy to drag her as she fought with all of her strength. He opened the door to a random car, he shoved her in and promptly slammed her head against the steering wheel so hard her skull cracked, skin splitting like the peel to a ripe banana. She instantly stopped moving. 

He put the vehicle into drive and promptly put her dead weighted foot on the gas pedal. He closed the door and shoved the car as hard as he could. With his unnatural strength he shot it forward at a good speed and watched as it slammed into a telephone poll. The hood wrapped around the wood so well that most people would not second guess what had happened. It would give them enough time to leave the area. 

He helped his son up and dusted him off. Before they left town he broke into a pharmacy and took large bottle’s worth of hydrocodone. While he was there he stuffed a pack full of gauze, ointment, bandages, tape and anything else he could think that would be of any use including antibiotics. 

They were on the road when he caught scent of someone following them. It had been present for a while and he forced himself to move them faster. He kept Fili close, pressing him to his chest making the teen stumble as he was forced into a quicker pace. 

“Dad. Dad, what’s going on?”

“Someone’s found us.” Frerin’s gate was long and quick, almost to a run.

“What?” Fili twisted to try to see what was behind them. His eyes glimpsed a silhouette of a man. He started to run, Frerin matching his pace easily, the two fully running. But the man kept up, continued to pursue them.

Fili hissed and clutched at his side making them slow down. Frerin quickly made a decision, he would have to stand and fight. Fili couldn’t run with his broken ribs. He picked up his son, holding him close as he ran trying hard not to jar him. 

He had to keep him safe. Keep anyone from getting him. 

He pushed himself even as his wounds hissed and stung, his insides feeling like they were tying themselves into knots. He pushed his lungs as they burned, forced his legs to keep going past the ache as he ran and ran.

No one could get Fili. No one could hurt him. He wouldn’t allow it!

But the person kept after him, kept the same distance as if taunting and wearing him out. His body shook and shivered and he knew he would collapse in his run if he didn’t stop.

 

“Don’t you come a step closer!!” Frerin shouted, panting, out of breath from running so far and long from his pursuer. He stepped back, removing the boy from his arms and around to keep him behind him.

“Frerin,” Fili’s voice shook as badly as his body did.

“Stay behind me,” Frerin hissed. “If he comes at me you run.”

“No.”

The dark figure moved, reaching into his long coat, pulling something out. Suddenly a flicker of light and Frerin could see the man’s face as he lit a cigarette. Bearded with a sharp nose, grim lines around his face.

The zippo lighter went out with a flick of the wrist. “I’m not here to kill you.” The man took a deep breath of his cigarette before letting it out slowly.

Frerin glared at him, carefully stepping farther back, down the road. He wasn’t going to play this game, he had to keep his guard up.

“Here.” The man backed away, stepping under a street light so Frerin could see him fully. He shrugged off his leather coat, dropping it to the ground showing the holsters of vials, guns, and carved wooden stakes. He held up his hands and did a little circle showing everything he had on him. “See, everything out in the open.”

“If you’re not going to kill us… then what are you going to do?”

“Figure you out.” The man took his cigarette between two fingers and pointed those fingers at Frerin. “I’ve been watching. I know what you are, but I’m not sure how you can be the way you are.”

“Y-you know?” Ice cold dread filled Frerin’s heart. His instincts told him to turn, grab Fili and run. “How many have you told?!”

“No one.” He took a drag from his cigarette, his other hand running through short hair. Fingers flexing in a way that showed he was used to having longer hair. “Far as I can gather, we three are the ones that know, after you killed that Hound two weeks ago. Well done, I might add, if I wasn’t more experienced than I would have thought it to be an accident just like everyone else.”

His lips curled in a snarl. “That bitch left me no choice.”

“I know. Like I said, I’ve been watching you for a while. Trying to understand your habits,” he motioned behind Frerin. “Been protecting this one since you adopted him three years ago, from your bond I would say you’ve known each other longer than that. But what I would like to know is why your hair turned golden when you had black hair.”

“Bleach.”

He threw back his head and laughed. “Oh, no, not you.” He hummed softly, tilting his head to the side. “Hmm… not you.”

“Who the hell are you? You’ve been trailing us for a while and haven’t attacked. So what kind of Hound are you?”

“Thorin,” he nodded his head in a slight bow. “And I’m not a Hound. I’m something much more rare, almost as rare as you.”

Fili moved behind Frerin, pulling on him. The blond man swallowed as a new set of fear cut into his bones. He had never seen one, only heard legends. Humans misconstrued the idea of what they were, telling tales of men and women who hunt monsters that prowled the night. They called them Hunters, with their skills and heroic deeds, but the rest of them, the ones that were in that convoluted part of the world called them Hounds. They hunted down their prey with dogged determination, never giving up, running the creatures down before biting into them. They traveled with more than one making a pack and it was hard to kill one without the rest of them finding out who did it. These people were not Hunters. Hunters were much more dangerous. They were much more intelligent, most monsters that were killed by a Hunter had no idea what had happened before it was too late. And yet here was one in front of him, any direction could be the trap laid for him and Fili. He was trapped even though he was out in the open.

“Like I said, I’m not going to hurt you, or your boy.” Thorin took another drag of his cigarette. He looked down as he dug out his pack again to pull out another one. “See, I only believe in going after the bad apples. Ones that kill without being provoked. So far, you’ve always been provoked, now haven’t you Emerald Butcher?”

Frerin’s eye twitched. “Don’t call me that.”

Thorin lit his new cigarette on the burning tip of the old one before snuffing the embers between his fingers. “Don’t like your title, Keeper?” 

“How do you know so much about me?!”

The hunter looked at him strangely. “Been watching you…” He swallowed, his saliva acidic from the cigarette smoke. He dipped down snatching his coat from the ground. “But as of right now I think you and the boy need a good place to sleep. Follow me.”

The vampire hesitated, weighing his options. All of it with a bad outcome. If he stayed here then he could be killed, run and they both could be killed, follow… still could be killed but it was more controllable. He could watch this strange man, maybe find a weakness, get Fili to safety was a slim possibility. 

It took effort to take a step forward. His heart beat hard and fast, no longer from running but fear. His arm was grabbed painfully tight. 

“Frerin, no.” Fili hissed.

“We have little choice.” He flexed his hands. “Just stay close to me.”


	28. Poppet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You probably don't want to read this in the dark.

The sky was dark, wiped blank of all things. The moon and stars were absent, no milky way or even clouds. It was empty and hollow, endlessly reaching up like the figures in the dead garden he stood in. 

There was no breeze, no breath of life. 

Everything was hideously silent in this world of gray and black. Fili took a breath, coughing thickly from the taste of charcoal that hung in the air. He raised up a hand, holding his sleeve over his nose and mouth so he could breathe. He wiggled his toes feeling warmth but felt something crumbling between. He looked down while lifting up a foot. He was wearing no shoes. The soft gray earth stuck to his skin.

No.

Not earth.

Ash.

He slowly turned taking in everything around him. Barebones of trees and black rocks surrounded him. An old stone bridge arched over a dry ditch.

It wasn’t ideal, but it was a place to go. It was higher ground, maybe he could see more of what was around him. 

His bare feet heated as he walked along the ash. The air felt thick and stifling as if it was trying to keep him in place. There was a pressure on him, forcing every movement to be difficult. He pushed his body forward, willing each heavy step. His toes dragged against the ground, scraping open. Ash caked in the raw wounds as he forced himself further.

The shifting of ash muffled his movements, keeping the world in a reverent silence. 

He let out a cough, foul tasting saliva dripping from the edge of his lip. He heaved several breaths having to take a moment to breathe already. He wasn’t even halfway to the bridge and he already felt like giving up. 

A few more breaths and he lifted his heel only to step back down as if he was stuck in thick mud. He tried moving again only to have a wet sensation on his ankle. Looking down he saw not ash but a black substance. It held a sheen on its surface where no light could have given it. The vampire lifted his foot again, feeling the slop hold onto him. He pressed his heel back down to the ground, something dislodging and brushing up against him. 

Something round and white came to the top, bobbing as if the tar was nothing but water. His gaze focused on it, watching the thing slowly move. Rotating with a hollow, gargled moan. 

He grit his teeth as fear spiked up his spine. He could feel the solid ground under his feet round off, crumble away and float up to the surface. Each white thing came up, gaping mouths and empty eyes of doll heads all crying out.

The one closest to him rolled, its empty mouth biting at his white pant leg. The black tar that clung to it flicked and pulled in tendrals, slapping up onto him. Each one solidifying into a hellish spider leg that was twisted and broken. 

He reached down and batted it away, knocking it back into the muck. The cries of the doll heads grew louder as they now started to move towards him, biting at his legs, pulling their broken legs up and crawling up him. Skittering along as a nightmarish mass, they sobbed in anguish and torment. He thrashed around trying to pull them off. The tar of their “bodies” webbed his fingers together, glued his hands down in awkward angles.

They pulled farther and farther up his body. One of the heads was so close now, resting on one of his twisted up arms that he could no longer move. Its cry settled, no longer sharp but blubbering like a tender sob heard at the end of a long hallway. He closed his mouth only to have one pry his lips open. The black pressed in, pushing past the gaps in his teeth. It forced his mouth open, a web of the corrupted grime laced in his teeth, the roof of his mouth and drooling down onto his tongue.

Then, it went inside his mouth.

Kili’s scream punctured the whole mountain side jarring Bifur out of the concentration he had on his work. He knocked over several towers of books and papers, rushing out of his backroom to the little kitchen where Kili was. The crutch that the brunet had been using to get around clattered to the floor as he gripped his head.

“FILI!!!” 

He reeled back, his scream that of a tortured man. 

Bifur grabbed Kili by the shoulders trying to yell over him. He gave a sharp shake. “Kili!! Kili!! What happened?!”

The young man shoved at Bifur so hard that the grown man fell back, smacking against the counter. Bifur reached back to try to keep himself up, his hand grabbing at things as he fell to the ground and bringing things clattering down with him. 

“Fili!” Kili tried to run, putting weight on his broken leg. The shock of the pain lanced straight from his knee, up his back and to his brain making him buckle and fall.

“Shit.” Bifur scrambled up, he opened drawer after drawer, throwing the contents onto the floor. He knew it was too soon! He should have kept the kid drugged for another week. It would have been easier on all of them, keeping him subdued from the terrors of the withdrawals of being away from his vampire.

Kili was crawling on the floor now, trying to get to the door. A horrible sickness splitting up his stomach. The tear ripped up his throat making his esophagus bulge before he spat and coughed. Mucus splattered onto the ground before a wiggling black mass slid forth, slithering with a dull thud onto the floor. He coughed several times, his stomach heaving as he tried to curl up onto his hands and knees despite the pain of his healing wounds. His mouth opened impossibly wide now, his head pounding with the pressure of vomiting. His jaw started to hurt, aching and then stinging as more pressure was applied from within. Something large was caught by his teeth.

Bifur rolled Kili over onto his side. His eyes growing wide.

“Good god…” 

Inside Kili’s mouth, peeking back at him was half of the face of a doll’s. A single artificial eye rolled around, looking at him then to the sides. Bifur reached in, slamming his thumb into the doll’s eye. The thing screamed as the thing popped like an overripe fruit. White gushed forward, splattering onto Kili’s lips and chin. Bifur yanked on the thing, pulling it out by force. Kili’s shout of pain from his jaw being dislocated from the movement came out more of a muffled sob as his throat was filled with the body of this thing.

It had long, thin limbs, covered in cloth. Yarn was sewn onto the head and it bore too much of a resemblance to the coughing college student that was on his floor. 

Kili saw the thing, how it flopped and flailed like a struggling fish. Fear and confusion gripped him tightly as he saw the very doll that Tauriel had given him move with life.

He watched Bifur grab a strange looking knife from the butcher block. It was encrusted with jewels and strange etchings. The Aware stabbed the thing, rocking the knife down and cutting into its body. The doll flailed, the sounds it made Kili had never heard before in his life. A sharp piercing shriek that overtook everything. Bifur continued to cut pieces off of the doll, scraping each one into the sink, he finally stabbed the knife into the center of the head. He stuffed the rest of the body into the garbage disposal, turning on the faucet to help it grind up. He grabbed a few bottles of herbs off of the spice rack and dumped them in the sink and all over the head that was pinned down to his counter top. Once this was done the shrieks stopped, only the grinding of the garbage disposal was left.

Bifur inhaled, once, twice. Then he was grabbing the phone, madly dialling Thorin. 

“Come on… Come on buddy, pick up… SHIT!” He waited for the voicemail to beep as he marched into his back room. He grabbed at papers and journals. He threw books to the ground as he collected only a select few things. “Thorin! Thorin, you listen to me carefully. It’s the Collective. I just pulled a fucking poppet out of Kili’s damn mouth. They know where I am. I’m taking the kid and hitting the fucking road. Keep moving, don’t stay still!!”

He hung up, stuffing his phone into his pocket. He grabbed a duffle bag and shoved his things into it and stormed out. He emptied his whole spice rack into the bag as well as his surgical kit that was now spilled onto the floor. He grabbed the hilt of his sacred knife and yanked it up. He scraped off the doll head into the sink.

“What’s going on?” Kili was still in shock, his dislocated jaw making it hard to talk.

Bifur bent over, he wrapped his arms around Kili’s chest and lifted him up. “We’re leaving.”


	29. past and present

Bifur drove like a mad man. The swing of his vehicle tilted it up onto two tires before slamming down with a bounce launching Kili several inches off of his seat before hitting back down. The student gritted his teeth, shouting through the pain as this punishment continued. He had no idea what the hell was going on, nor why it was happening. After Bifur had pulled what he called a “poppet” out of Kili’s mouth and disposed of it he had mixed some awful concoction out of his bag and forced it down Kili’s throat as well as stuffed some of it up his nose. Powder was blown into his eyes and nose and while he tried to rub the stinging sensation out he was manhandled, his pants down and accessed his other orifices and said it was for his own good. 

“What the hell is going on?!” Kili shouted as he tried to brace himself against the car door as it rocked onto two wheels again. “You pull a fucking doll out of my mouth, you rip my clothes off and shove something up my ass! Now you’re kidnapping me?!”

“I ain’t kidnapping you boy!!” Bifur turned another corner, the bounce of the car making Kili growl loudly in agony. “I’m saving your life!”

“How is any of this saving my life you insane prick?!”

“I was wrong, they weren’t infusing you with magic. The fucking assholes-” He grabbed the wheel and paddled his hands across it giving another sharp turn making Kili slide and hit into his side.

“What, they’re doing what?!”

“They’re trying to make you into a familiar!” 

“A what?!”

“A tool! It’s a-it’s a fucking tool to use to focus magic through so make them more powerful! Familiars are used to do deeds for the witches from spying, scouting, keeping an eye on interests and victims.”

Kili only shouted in reply when he was thrown against the door when Bifur nearly flipped the car onto its side with another turn.

“Shit kid, don’t you get it?! You’re a sleeper cell for the Collective! Fili and Frerin, you’ve fucked them good!!” 

A sleeper cell? This whole time… the people out to hurt the vampires… they had been using Kili as a tool to get to them?

His Fili…

Kili twisted his good hand into the seatbelt that hung limply. He hated being used. He hated people who picked on others just because they were different. Moreover, he was going to fuck over who ever tried to get at his boyfriend.

He bared his teeth as he snapped at Bifur. “Fucking drive faster!”

Bifur ran his jeep down to the nearest town where he pulled up to a police station. He got out, pulling a limping Kili with him, the crutch he used barely able to keep his weight between hops. The grizzled man unfurled a piece of burlap that showed it had different tools in it. He went to the trunk of a police car and picked it open. He threw his stuff in while Kili looked at him in horror. A cop car… they were stealing a police vehicle?! 

The student’s voice dipping down into a harsh whisper. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“We need a ride that will get us as far from here as possible with no questions asked.”

“You can’t steal a cop car!!” Kili hissed.

“You have a better idea, sunshine? Because from where I’m standing death by cop is a better option.”

Brown eyes swam through a mixture of emotions. He didn’t know what to think. All of this didn’t make sense. He was still coming to terms that Fili was a vampire of all things and that magic existed. Having nightmares and some screwed up doll pulled out of his mouth was over the top and he was surprised he was still mentally sane enough to form sentences. 

Bifur picked the lock on the driver’s side of the door, he hit the unlock button and growled out. “Just get the hell in the car.”

“Okay… sure… Haven’t become a felon yet, at least I can cross this off my bucket list.” Kili gave up the fight. 

“Luckily the cops in this town are all lazy bastards that don’t give two shits as to what’s going on.” Bifur bent down and started to fiddle with something. There was a crackling sound as he worked, and an electric burning scent before the car purred to life. He leaned back and easily rolled the car into reverse. “The key to not getting caught is to look like you should be there. If they think you belong or are not doing anything then they won’t suspect.”

“They?”

“Everyone, really.” He pulled the car into the street. He switched gears and slammed his foot onto the gas pedal. He glanced around the console before finding a switch that he flicked, the siren shrieking as he hit the freeway. “Now shut the hell up while I get us the fuck out of here.”

\-------------------------  
15 years ago  
\-------------------------

Thorin watched Frerin move, his eyes drinking the the vampire now that he was so close. How long had he watched him? His attention drawn to the vampire as long as he could spare them. His mouth went dry and his fingers twitched with the need to reach out and take hold. He wanted to talk to him, hear his voice wash over him. Get those impossibly enchanting eyes to look at him and only him. He needed to see their depths, to see that spark of life he carried with him like no other. 

He took them into an americanized pub. One side a bar the other a family seating area that was empty and mostly quiet. The only noises floating in from the televisions from the bar area. Thorin felt his lips pull up as he held out his hand.

“Sit. We’ll eat while we talk.” He kept his voice low and soft trying to show he meant no harm. 

When the vampires made no sign of moving Thorin took the initiative. He pulled out one chair and stood behind it. He looked at Frerin, feeling a slight blush creep up onto his cheeks. His heart skipped a beat when the regal creature eyed him. He patiently waited when it was decided that he was indeed not trying to trick them and Frerin reached for the back of the chair.

“Allow me.” Thorin said perhaps too quickly.

The vampire’s eyelashes fluttered as he was taken aback. Disarmed by the courteous gesture. If Thorin had less control over himself he would have probably sighed out loud. As it was he pushed in Frerin’s chair, even offering to do the same for Fili who only glared at him and rattled his own seat into place. A hand held tightly over his aching side. His ribs were still mending and he felt like throwing up from the pain.

Frerin found Fili’s knee under the table, holding onto it as the hunter took his seat from across them. They didn’t know what was to come and he wanted to show what little reassurance he could. A waitress came and was dropping down menus when Thorin spoke said, “Can we get some pepsis and water for everyone?”

“Sure.” The woman chirped. “Anything stronger?”

“No.” Thorin waves his fingers in the air in a way to show he was done talking with her, his eyes locking onto Frerin once more. The once Keeper was drumming his finger nails on the table. 

The waitress left leaving him alone with his prey. He rested his elbows on the table, rubbing his hands together as he tried to think of what to say. He pointed to the untouched menus after a few minutes.

“You can order what you want, anything. My treat.” 

“How kind of you,” Frerin bit out. “Last meals are important.”

“What?” Fili looked up at Frerin.

“I told you. I won’t hurt you.” Thorin reached over without thinking. He took up Frerin’s hand. His fingers slid with smooth comforting motions. Once more his pulse pittered and pattered up into his throat as he felt skin that was not withdrawing. “I would never hurt you.”

Fili got up. He leaned over Frerin and pulled his hand free from Thorin. The older vampire suddenly blinking as if broken out of a trance. “What is wrong with you?”

“Fili,” Frerin mumbled.

“No. He’s been eyeing you this whole time like you’re some sort of piece of meat and he’s a starved wolf! Now he’s treating us to dinner after chasing us down? And you’re sitting there letting him push in your chair and grope your hand like some sort of creep!”

“Fili, sit down.”

“No!” Fili looked to Thorin, slapping his hands down onto the table making the contents rattle. “Who the hell are you?! What do you want with Frerin?!”

The hunter looked at the youth that was still smooth in the face. He looked almost like an elf from lore, so fair and elegant in looks. If it wasn’t for his circumstances he would have been in school, learning all the things vampires teach. He would be breaking hearts and spending long nights in locker lined hallways, kissing girls and teasing their skirts. But here he was, with broken ribs, showing his fangs because a stranger was touching the father he almost lost.

Thorin took up his utensils that were rolled up in a napkin. He was carefully unrolling it as he chose his words. 

“Boy, I mean what I say. You and your companion here, have nothing to fear from me. In fact, I would like to offer my help.”

“Your… your help?” 

Thorin’s words effectively disarmed the youth making him sit back down with a thump. He winced, his hand coming up to his side. With eyes watering from pain he growled out between clenched teeth. “What kind of help?”

“To keep the two of you safe. As I said before I know what you are, but how you came to be I’m not too sure. How you work is a mystery to me and I never make a move until I know what I’m dealing with.”

He went quiet as the waitress showed back up with their drinks. Thorin flipped open his menu and simply asked the waitress to wait for a few seconds. He proceeded to order their most expensive steak meal for all of them and made a special request for Frerin and Fili to have two additional steaks with theirs.

“How would you like them prepared?” The waitress was writing everything down.

Thorin looked to the vampires and smiled. “Blue. For them and medium rare for me.”

“Blue?” She asked.

“The chef should know.” He waved her off once more, she quickly gathered the menus and left once again. Thorin took hold of the straw to his drink and swirled it around making the soda bubble around the shifting ice cubes. “You see, Fili, I don’t do what I do because I like it. I do it because it has to be done.”

“Massacring those who don’t deserve it is not something that has to be done.” Frerin held up his chin, showing off his presence. The look that commanded so many of the vampires that held political offices. It was powerful, intimidating, showing he would not budge and was issuing a challenge. 

Thorin’s expression fell positively love sick as he looked at the blond. There it was. Reason, power, grace, beauty… and so much more. Frerin had been a Keeper, being groomed to be a Regnum and he held all the bearings of a world leader without the aristocratic bullshit airs. No, he was was the real deal. He was the future to the vampires of North America… His gaze rolled lazily over to Fili who was digging a packet of pain pills out of his coat pocket. His fingers shook as he tried to open the thing. 

Frerin had given up his future, possibly that of all vampires in the USA because of this boy. This boy that was immensely special.

“You’re exactly right,” he said lowly. “Killing should only happen if necessary and thus I do what I do. I know the legends that are told amongst your kind about hunters. A boogie man under the bed, a closet monster to jump out and frighten little wolves and vamps into behaving. And if it keeps them behaving then let the word spread. I don’t mind being ostracized by fear and hatred. What I mind are the vampires that go mad with blood lust. The ones that drink someone dry be it vampire, wolf, or human. I mind the wolves who go into frenzies and kill others because they cannot control themselves. I mind the witches that torture others no matter the race because they think it’s ‘fun’...” He looked at both of them with open honesty. “and I hate hounds that come after innocent people that their only crime is living.”

“You’re saying… you hunt equally?”

“I’m saying I hunt down those that justice can’t touch. Everyone is the same to me.” He leaned back and folded his arms over his chest. “I don’t approve of most methods that hounds execute and if you had not disposed of the one that had hurt Fili then I would have had to do it myself.”

Frerin eyed him. “You… would have defended him?”

“I keep repeating myself and I keep hoping you’ll listen to me.” Thorin adjusted himself in his seat. “You both are innocent. Fili’s only crime is being a kid, yours is being alive and doing what you have to do. Even the Seattle St. Patrick Massacre, you had to do what you had to do.”

“What- what’s the Seattle St. Patrick Massacre?” Fili looked at Frerin.

“Nothing.”

Thorin rested a cheek in his palm. “Not, nothing. Your guardian, here, single handedly wiped out a whole coven that was in one Seattle’s underground tunnels. He had heard whispers of people disappearing from the area, but not humans, vampires and werewolves. He lead an investigation and soon as they found their location he was the only one on the team that could get through their barricade. Ripped through the magic like it was a paper screen. Then he killed them.”

“A-all of them?”

Frerin’s eyes were dark, his brows drawn forward. His lips were pulled down in a deep scowl as he remembered the events. “They had been experimenting. Forcing breeding between vampire and werewolf while they cast spells. They were hoping to create a new type of ‘bear’ as they called it. A spiritual beast that would protect the coven. But when the child was born and was not satisfactory they would kill it. Boil it with ‘sacred’ herbs then feed the soup to the parents to try again.”

“That’s… that’s fucking twisted.” Fili felt his stomach lurch.

Frerin looked at Fili with a hard eye. “Never. Ever. Trust coven.”

“That’s why you… hated Dis?”

“And I had good reason to.” The older vampire turned his eye back onto Thorin. “Since you know so much about me, know I’m not a threat to anyone. What do you want?”

“To marry you.”

Both vampires went quiet, looking at him as if he had two heads. Thorin sipped at his drink ignoring the confused looks. 

Frerin huffed out a laugh. “You have got to be the strangest person I’ve ever met.”

“I’m serious.” Thorin replied. “I want you to be my husband.”

“That’s not-”

“I can make it legal, don’t worry about that. Plus, having me on your team, I do believe we can work together well and keep Fili safe while we learn about what is happening to him and you under a much safer and more controlled environment.” Thorin shifted in his seat, stuffing a hand into the pocket of his pants. “You don’t need to answer my proposal but in the least let me get you settled into- where is it?”

He stood up padding down his pockets. He pulled out his wallet and opened it, a gold ring dropping out of the folds. “There it is.”

He put his wallet back into his pocket and sat back down. He shoved the ring across the table towards Frerin. “It’s yours, wear it in the next three days if you accept, if not, it’s still yours. You can sell it for extra pocket money if you wish.”

“Why are you doing this?” Frerin stared at the ring.

Thorin felt his skin twitch, a nervousness settling in his stomach. He had tried to keep himself in check, in control… but… something about Frerin dug deep into him. It shoveled and hunted, tracking his innermost self down until he had to face the fact that it was becoming maddening to not be around the vampire. 

He opened his mouth to say something when their meals came it was hard for any of them to take the first action of picking up fork and knife. They all sat awkwardly. Fili rubbed his sore side looking at his food, swallowing at the barely browned steak, blood pooling on the plate. It looked so good. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had blood that wasn’t Frerin’s. Animal or human it would be a welcomed change of pace. It smelled great and his mouth watered.

Thorin sat with his shoulders hunched over, he didn’t look up from the plate in front of him. He couldn’t… He was worried over this. He may be able to keep his cool but something about Frerin seemed to make him go… funny. He thought of him so often, got agitated when he couldn’t watch over him. He wanted to have Frerin see him, say his name. He wanted to run his fingers through hair and caress cheek. He had been having dreams of him calling out to Thorin, beckoning him.

Frerin didn’t know what to say. Looking at the hunter, hearing his voice… it… it confused him. Despite his fear he wanted to get close to him. Because of this he didn’t know how to act, what to say beyond what he could carefully control. 

As usual he was the first to make a move. He straightened his shoulders and picked up his utensils, unraveling them from the napkin. He laid out the napkin under the plate and over the edge of the table. He scooted forward and started to cut into the meat. Seeing what he was doing, Fili followed suit, and doing as he had done since he was little, he mimicked Frerin’s actions. Thorin was much slower in his movements, but glad for the push forward.

The rest of the afternoon was quiet until they had to leave. Thorin was glad to note that the ring had disappeared off of the table. They went outside into the cool night air still carrying that silence of unanswered questions. Fili was close to Frerin’s side as Thorin adjusted the collar of his coat. 

“What now?” Fili asked, looking up at Frerin.

Frerin looked to his son. He gave as much of a reassuring smile as he could. “We see what Thorin can do for us.”

At the sound of his name the hunter straightened his back, lips opening slightly. Frerin’s gaze locked onto his. “If we can do better on our own, will you let us leave?”

A pang shot into Thorin’s heart. Leave? Frerin would leave?

He pushed the thought to the side. “I will.”

“You know what I’ll have to do if you break your word.”

“I know…”

“...then… lead the way.”

“First thing’s first,” Thorin dug out his pack of cigarettes. “It’s gonna be a several day drive to get to where we need to go. So we’ll stop by a store and pick up some stuff for the way, until we can reach another state.”

“Fair enough.” Frerin and Fili followed Thorin to a storm blue truck. Frerin sat between them, making sure to stay between a possible threat and his son. His thigh brushed against the human’s. He deliberately didn’t look down, even when Thorin shifted gears and his fingers brushed against Frerin’s leg sending a strange jolt through his system.

The drive to a store was short and Thorin put some money into Fili’s hand and told him to get what he wanted. The teen went slowly, his father staying close. Thorin went to other parts picking up large jugs of water and some comforter sets. He stopped by the pillow display and grabbed several throws. He passed by a section that made him slowly back up. He looked at the planned parenting, the different boxes of condoms and lubricants in a tiny area. He pushed his cart past it only to curse himself and run back grabbing lube and condoms. He quickly bought those and stuffed them into his coat pocket before continuing to find what he wanted. He found a small tent that would work and egg crate cushions for makeshift mattresses. It would be some time until they got to Bifur’s and even then he didn’t have room for all of them in his small house. 

By the time he was done Frerin and Fili had already finished and were waiting by the truck. He slowed himself down, seeing them stand there with alike stances. Fili would look at Frerin with subconscious glances before adjusting himself. Thorin leaned against the handle of the cart, watching as Frerin reached over and mussed up Fili’s hair while the other was biting into what looked like a fruit roll up. 

“It’s stupid, you know.” Fili’s voice traveled down to Thorin as the vampires were oblivious to him. “To miss it.”

“It’s not stupid, kiddo. I miss it too.”

“...you don’t have to lie.” Fili’s shoulders sagged.

“I’m not lying. I miss the vending machine too. Cola flavored blood, coconut blood, mmmm one day I’ll wrap my lips around some tasty, -tasty- blood orange again.” Frerin propped his elbow on top of Fili’s head and started to lean making the teen shove his arm off.

“Hey!”

“Hey yourself.” Frerin smiled.

“God, dad. I’m trying to be serious.” Fili grumbled.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope this explains covens for everyone.

The weather was warm on the verge of being hot. Still the paper cup of cheap coffee at the rest stop was welcomed into Kili’s shaking grip. They had hopped over a state line before stealing another car, drove until they were past Idaho south for so long he lost count of days. Now there was a sign that stood down the road that said “welcome to Utah”. He was so far away from Fili he could barely feel the pulse of life in the vampire. It was erratic as the stream of nightmares he was experiencing between seeing Fili pinned down and beat to death to being tortured and bled out into a ritualistic cup. 

“It doesn’t get easier.” Bifur leaned against the hood of their stolen car. “Thorin told me once that the dreams stay with you until you’re with your vamp again.”

“I don’t care about that.” Kili ran fingers through his growing bangs, the brace over his hand scraped against his skin leaving a red patch from how hard he rubbed. “I just want him safe. Him and Frerin.”

The grizzled man nodded. He crossed his feet at the ankles, looking up at the blue sky above. There weren’t many people at this rest stop, and it was barely seven am. It gave them a moment of peace. The only sounds being the distant murmurs of the rest stop volunteers and the droning sound of a passing car on the freeway. He had tried getting a hold of Thorin, leaving messages but the hunter had not picked up. It meant shit had hit the fan… and there was nothing he could do until his best friend contacted him.

He brought up a hand, rubbing at his eyes and the bridge of his nose. He had made a point not to care, to put himself as far away from the situation as he could. But he could still remember two scared vampires being dropped off at his doorstep. He could still hear Frerin’s voice as he grabbed a hold of Thorin’s sleeve and hissed out, “You better return.” Thorin had looked down at Frerin’s hand surprised, his eyes growing gentle when he saw the golden ring. The hunter nodded and was gone, taking care of a pack of hounds that had caught scent of them. There had been no explanation of who they were, Thorin had just barked at him to keep them safe.

Bifur swallowed trying to push memories of laughter and jokes from Frerin, seeing Fili slowly pull out of his shell. He tried to forget Bilbo’s first reaction upon meeting Fili, his wild bunny eyes as he poked curiously at the vampire. The taste of Frerin’s cooking banked in his memory, the sound of Thorin kissing his vampire for the first time in the early morning hours, covered in blood, dirt and soot. 

“You okay?” Kili asked softly, his hand still shaking as he tried to sip from the paper cup.

“Yeah… just… thinking of dumb shit.”

“I think both of us need a little of that right now. To lessen the anxiety… so what were you thinking about?”

“Like I said, dumb shit.” Bifur growled. He didn’t want to admit that he wanted things to smooth out, that he wanted to have something as simple as a family barbeque with them. How he wanted to have Fili for a week of nothing but the two being stupid bachelors sitting on his grimy couch drinking beer and eating pizza. Worst of all, he didn’t know that he wanted these things until it was too late. He wouldn’t have them, none of it.

He cleared his throat, sipping on his coffee that tasted like cigarette ash. He looked at the cup and then dumped it onto the cement to his side. The wind pushing some of the drops onto his pant leg. “Fucking awful.” 

“It is.” Kili continued to sip, he needed it mostly as a tool to ground himself. To try to get past the fact that he could feel the flickering beat of Fili so far off, beating wildly like a war drum. “So… um… I’ve been wanting to know something and no one has told me anything about it. I’m assuming you might know a little.”

Bifur raised up his hands, he made a circle with his fingers and started to poke a finger through the hole. Kili rolled his eyes. “I know how to have sex, thank you.”

“Sorry, I meant this.” Bifur tightened the hole to nothing and tried to force his finger through it.

Kili laughed. “Fucking god, man, you’re terrible.”

Bifur grinned. “Both needed a laugh, boy. So, what’s on your mind.”

“Well… when I first met Fili I didn’t know anything about him, just saw his eyes and I couldn’t stop thinking about those eyes.”

“That’s the first part of being a Donor.” Bifur said. “It’s the first sign of attraction. And let me guess, you needed to see him again and you needed to hear his voice, especially have him say your name.”

“Y-yeah.”

“Thorin went through that too.”

“But that’s not what I wanted to tell you. See… when I was just his friend, nothing else. I went back to college, to my dorm and… my friend…” Kili looked to the ground. “I thought she was my friend… she gave me that poppet thing. I had nightmares of it moving around the room so I shoved it into the bathroom and then I had nightmares of being in a blue doll house. I would go climb through this door, go down a hallway then climb up these stairs to this room that was wide and open and there are windows but I don’t want to look out the windows. I’m too scared to. Then I leave, slide down, down… down… to this place that has piles of toys. Old and new, broken and whole and something is down there with me, sifting through them. I would always wake up terrified to the point I felt sick… It was effecting my friend, Ori, too. Fili called out of the blue and had us come over. He did something and it all stopped. I stayed behind and lent Ori my car and… well… all of this happened. The thing that convinced Thorin not to kill me was a story about Fili having a dream of me being in a dollhouse.” Kili turned to Bifur. “My question is; Why is this so significant? What’s…” he trailed off seeing the unusual expression on the man’s face. He looked purely worried but his face was pale. “Bifur?”

The mountain man rubbed at part of his face. “Fuck, Thorin… why didn’t you say something?”

“What?”

“What other dreams did you have?”

“Uh… I… one with a woman bathing and brushing her hair. Black tar comes from her hair and baby doll faces come out of the tar. Her face is gaping with no eyes and that tar crap is coming out of her eyes and mouth.”

Bifur nodded several times. His lips tight as he pushed out a whispered. “Okay.”

“Hey, hey,” Kili offered a smile, though it was strained. “I’m sure it’s not that bad… right?”

“You don’t even know the half of it kid… no where near…”

“Then tell me. Let me help instead of being here and clueless. Isn’t that why Thorin threw me at you in the first place?”

“He threw you at me because of your manifestation. He threw you at me because he knew I can keep you on the move.” Bifur ran a hand over his head, his salt and pepper hair bunching in tiny knots. “Okay… first thing is first. I need to tell you about magic and how covens work before I can tell you what’s really going on.”

Kili nodded slowly.

“Magic is… well, magic. It’s so old no one really knows what it is. Kind of like how no one can know what light looks like if you go the speed of light. Trying to describe magic is like trying to see time. It doesn’t happen. But there are rules to it.” He dug into his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. He held it up and pulled out on cigarette. He gently rolled it as he held it out. “Magic supplies something to the user, like this cigarette supplies nicotine. Magic is filtered through the core, burning like the tobacco. Pulled through and brought into another form through spells and incantations, like cigarette smoke. It can’t be used any other way. But, it can be passed on to person to person like a cigarette can be handed to person to person. Easy, simple. While some people can handle the cigarette or magic, other’s can’t. They get sick from it, reject it.”

“Is that why Fili gets sick a lot?”

“Nah, the kid always got sick. Happens to a lot of natural born believe it or not. He actually adapted to magic real well which usually only happens with witches born into long lines of witches. Now, there is another trick with magic, a rule.”

“What’s that?”

“Emotions influence it. The more emotions you have the harder to control your magic.”

Kili’s mouth fell open. He put his splinted hand up. “Is that why Fili was so withdrawn when I met him?”

“You know it. He had been trying to keep his emotions in check for years. Some called him prideful, others called him standoff-ish, emo, punk, list goes on, but all because he was guarding himself. Keeping his emotions under control so his magic wouldn’t lash out. Now… if magic lashes out anything can happen from cups moving across the table on their own, hearing hammering or rattling chains, even ghostly moans. Most hauntings, that I’ve researched were actually the doings of someone with magic that allowed themselves to get emotional. Sadly enough, these people don’t even know that they have magic.”

“So… Fili was researching witches when he was looking at parapsychology books… to know what to look out for.”

“Sounds like him. He takes after his pop. Frerin always liked to know what he was getting into first, Fili likes to follow in his footsteps.”

Bifur then pulled out a few more cigarettes. “Back to the subject. Here’s another thing about magic; the more people in your coven, the more powerful you become. Take all the tobacco from these cigarettes, roll them all up into one and you get a better hit, right?”

Kili nodded.

“Same thing with magic. The more witches that gather together the more damage they can do. It’s like each one has a cigarette to throw into the bowel and everyone gets to take as much as they want. While the tobacco will get used up, magic doesn’t. The only way for that to deplete is in the removal of a witch either they find another coven or they die. This is where the coven structure comes in. There are four stations.” He held out his cigarette box. “Take this box. Let’s call it the Coven Master. The coven master is the one that collects every witch together. They’re the one in charge and they get the biggest piece of the magic pie. They are the dangerous mother fuckers that know more spells than anyone else. Now, the people that are their right hand and left hand.” 

Bifur turned around and put the cigarette box on the hood of the car. He put two cigarettes on either side of the box. He put his finger down by one of them. “These guys, they’re called Hollow Yves or Yves.”

“Yves?”

“Old word for eyes. They are the second most powerful. They organize everyone else and what they do. They are the planners, the technicians and puppeteers. Yves are possibly more dangerous than the Coven Master because they are required to be more cunning than their master, but their power will not match that of the Master. This is a safety precaution put in by the Master because really who wants to be killed by their advisors? After the Yves you have these guys. He put down to more cigarettes at angles making them look like a little barricade. These guys are the enforcers, the brutes, but also the guardians of the coven. They protect everyone but also the ones that will do most of the dirty work.”

“What are they called?”

“Gates. Gates are just as strong as Yves, but not as smart. The rest of the coven are called Mice. There are a lot of them and they will try to infest an area. Mice are dangerous because they don’t think of consequences. That stupid chick, Dis, was a Mouse.”

“Why did she ever give Fili her magic?”

“I dug up dirt on that one.” Bifur gathered his things together, putting the cigarettes back into the box. “I haven’t told Fili, but she did it just for the hell of it.”

“What?”

“Found some of her old friends, chatted them up, they believed I was a witch wanting to get into a new coven and told me everything. Turned out she wanted to just ruin someone’s life. Thought it would be funny to see someone struggle with magic. Then she would take it away before anyone knew any better. She didn’t count on the fact that the magic didn’t want to leave Fili, as a result it lashed out and killed her.”

“Fili… killed Dis?”

“Yeeep. He doesn’t know it either. See, when magic is threatened it’ll fight back. Sometimes it’ll get wounded and that wound will show up as this black slug that is called ‘corruption’. Corruption will run around and cause havoc until it dies out or is dealt with. Few things slow it down, water is the most effective.”

“Water… does?” A flash of a water bottle sloshing over a black slug, racing at him. The stab of a sacred knife impaling it to the ground. “Why? Why water?”

“Not sure, but before the dawn of man water has always been regarded as sacred. Far as I can gather… the tar you saw in your dream is corruption and a shit ton of it.”

“And the doll stuff? The lady?”

Bifur sighed heavily. His shoulders pushed down by an unseen weight. “That would be the Collective.”

“The Collective.” Kili pursed his lips.

“They were once a small coven, but they took more witches in. Eventually they started to take over other covens by force, and it does happen, one coven attacking another just to gain numbers. But it didn’t stop with just one or two fights. They continued, and they pushed and soon they had all manner of witches. They are so large they take up most of the united states, There are a couple of handfuls that are not part of them. Mostly old ones with magic that isn’t compatible with theirs so it makes it useless for them to take them. Then there are the ones up in the inland northwest that act more like wizards than covens.”

“Wait, compatible? Wizards?”

“Magic can be like two wolves when they clash, fighting and creating that corruption I told you. Not all magic is the same and sometimes they don’t get along. Now wizards-” He sighed again. “Wizards are strange to me. I don’t know how they work beyond the fact they are just as powerful as any coven master but they are by themselves with no coven to boost their powers. Wizards are few and far between and I only know of five in the whole world. One, being Bilbo’s mentor. Gandalf, he’s mellow guy and really nice and the only wizard I’ve ever met. In fact he was the one that told me that there are only four others. I had no clue, I thought he was the only one.”

“What do wizards do?”

“Far as I know, everything from little tricks of the eye like flashes of light to creating a firestorm around them.”

“...so… the doll stuff?”

“Ah, that’s part of the collective. Their main magic comes from an old, old base. Dolls have been around for a very long time from being created out of mud and grass all the way up to cloth and plastic. Dolls are vessels. Empty shells waiting to be filled, like a filter to a cigarette. The Collective uses dolls to focus their magic through and use them to do their bidding. Once done, they are disposed off because they can be used only once. It’s probably why you dreamed of all the broken toys.”

“And the house? What about why I expect to see something I shouldn’t if I look up in that big room?”

“That… I need to do some stuff first before I can answer fully, but from what I can tell, you doubled backed on them.”

“Huh?”

“They were supposed to spy through you, but in your subconscious you turned around and looked back at them. The thing outside of that room… I suggest you look at it next time you have that dream.”

Kili felt his insides shiver. A deep fear of seeing what was out there bit into him. He never wanted to have that dream again, but if it held answers… maybe he should.

“And, um, ahem, uhm… why, why does this make you worried?” Kili tried to push his fear to the side even though he could feel a shaking still in his guts.

“Because I don’t know what the fuck you are.”

Kili’s attention snapped, eyes locking onto Bifur’s. He searched for any sign that this was a joke, a lie. He looked for a twitch of the eye or lip, for a rapid beat of pulse in Bifur’s neck, anything that would give him away. All he found was the man serious. Dead serious.


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter of this.

Thorin called Bifur, resting against the wall outside of Frerin’s hospital room. He knew it had been a while, that Bifur had left many voice mails. He didn’t have the time to hear them as he spent what little he had left with Frerin. He had tried to see Fili but the young vampire had been deemed too dangerous for interaction and was going through “sleep therapy” for several days. His mind was a mess and he couldn’t focus worried over Fili and terrified of having a life without his husband. He wasn’t concentrating and it left an opening for dangers to sneak in. Then there was the fact he had been spending any spare time in researching in the oldest libraries around and talking to historians and folklorists for any sort of information on how to put magic back into someone, how to prolong it or replace it. He had even reverted to talking to priests of several different types of religions. He bought a laptop and a wifi hotspot to do more research on his bedside vigilance. He had read several things on demonology before he had to stop himself and call his Awakened friend. He would know what to do, dabbling in dark arts wasn’t the answer…

The phone rung a few times before the man answered. He could hear the running of water, the flushing of toilets. Bifur must be in a public restroom.

“Fucking, finally.” Bifur bit out. “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you!”

“I… We’re still in Washington… and...” He choked on his words. Closing his eyes tightly.

“I haven’t heard anything from Bill and you can’t fucking return a damn call! We’re dealing with the Collective, they’ve been trying to turn Kili into a familiar and fucking hell man this kid is something I don’t even know. I thought he was a wight, he had the marking of one! But now I have no clue because the freak is subconsciously spying back on the Collective. He even saw into their warehouse.”

“Bifur.”

“You know, where they throw their used up vessels, all those dolls? Yeah, he saw it! No one sees that shit!”

“Frerin’s dying.”

The were was silence. 

All Thorin could hear was the low murmur of people milling about around him. He rested his head against the wall he was leaning on. He squeezed his eyes closed as he thumped his head lightly on the wall. He was at a loss. He didn’t know what to do to save his husband.

“How?” Bifur’s voice went quiet.

“The…” Thorin took some time to breathe. He didn’t want this to be real. “It’s my fault… He needed my blood and I wasn’t there.”

“If he’s starving to death then bleed out on him!!” Bifur slammed open the restroom door and stormed out. The buzz of cars going by the rest stop was loud.

“You think I haven’t tried putting my blood into his mouth? To get needles and inject him with it?!” Thorin hissed, his sadness twisting into anger. “The magic keeping him alive is either being pulled out of him or it’s running out. His organs are failing, his skin is starting to pucker in markings that look like he was mauled by a bear.”

“And his hair?” 

“It’s almost completely black now.”

“Ssshit!” Bifur hit Kili upside the shoulder when he passed by the youth that was eating a bag of chips from a vending machine. “Get in the fucking car!”

“Why, what’s going on?” Kili hopped on a crutch that Bifur had stolen in the last town they had been in. 

“Frerin’s reverting back to his dying state.” Bifur threw himself into the driver’s seat and put the phone on speaker. 

“Frerin’s what?!” Kili took a bit more time getting in.

“I’m pretty sure that Fili told you that he saved his dad’s life. Well what he did was basically stop time for Frerin and moved him onto his own life force. He was giving him a piggyback ride on his soul, and it was only happening because of Fili’s magic. Something’s going on with Fili and he either is evicting Frerin or-”

“What the fuck is happening to Fili?!” Kili grabbed the phone, where he heard a noise come over. “Is this Thorin? Are you Thorin?!”

“It’s me.” Thorin confirmed.

“You said you would keep them safe, what the fuck is going on?!”

“I don’t know what’s going on! We need Bilbo to show the fuck up because magic isn’t something anyone but coven know much about!”

“Tell me what’s going on with Fili!”

“He’s in the mental ward of the hospital we’re in.”

“M-mental ward?”

“Kid. A vampire is violent by nature, having their Donor leave only serves to take the lid off of their bottled up potential. You think Fili didn’t get his ass kicked when I had to leave Frerin? Well guess what, he did. And now it’s payback time and Frerin’s fucking paying for you fucking up their lives by butting in where you weren’t wanted!!”

“We’re coming to you, text me your address.” Bifur was already on the freeway, going as fast as he could.

“You can’t come here, if Fili-”

“I blocked him! Did all the magic spice mojo, hoodoo, crap that I could.” Bifur rounded a car while honking his horn. He looked at Kili as the car swirved. “And before you even fucking ask; You remember that smoke I blew all over you and shoved up your face and ass? Well that’s something Bill taught me to completely sever all magical ties. All of it! And a witch, even fucking Fili, subconsciously places claim on their lovers leaving magical traces on them. It probably even fucked up your Tether as well. Which means-”

Thorin pushed himself off of the wall, Bifur’s words slamming into him. “Fili’s about to go supernova…” He spun in place looking down the all. “Get here as fast as you can.”

“Supernova?” Kili looked down at the phone that was silent. He shook it. “He fucking hung up! What the hell does supernova mean?!”

“It means the vamp is pulling all sources of magic available to him, what is left in Frerin too, and is going to fucking blow shit up!”

“Why would he do that?!”

“You’re in college, fucking figure it out! His father is in a constant state of dying and he can feel it every minute of every day, he’s fighting with magic that’s creating a war inside of him, and his fucking Donor -the only thing that gave him any sort of relief- was suddenly ripped away from him!”

Kili looked out the window, seeing the world speed by. It was beyond a recipe for disaster, it was volatile mix that birthed death. He pressed a hand to his face, silently praying that it would not result in suicide. He cared about Fili… he didn’t want anything to happen to him.

When Thorin hung up and started to sprint down the hall. Someone watched the hunter, a man with short dark hair and barely any facial hair. He wore scrubs and was leaning over the nurse’s station talking with one of the ladies that was shuffling with paperwork. 

“Doing volunteer work can be such a pain. You do just as much as us and you don’t get paid.” The nurse sighed.

“It’s good experience. If I do well enough I might get hired.” The man turned around and rested his back and elbows against the top of the station as he watched Thorin.

“It would be nice to have you around more, Bard.” The nurse hugged some files to her chest. “I got to do my rounds. Say hi to your friend for me, I heard she’s doing great in the mental ward.”

“Taureil’s got a gift. I’ll make sure to tell her you said hi.” Bard waved his hand a little. He waited for half a minute making sure he was alone before shoved himself away from his perch. He easily walked into the room that held Frerin. He pulled back the curtain that sheltered the vampire from the rest of the hospital. He looked down at the red spots that started to form on the white blanket. 

He reached inside his pants finding the leather holster that was strapped to his thigh. He pulled out a knife. The metal tooth long and curved at the tip. He used the tip to hook onto the blanket and pulled it down to the hips. A large dark patch of blood stained the hospital gown, making the material stick to skin.

“Looks like it hurts…” Bard picked up the edge of the gown. The wet peeling sound made his stomach clench, He could see puckered skin splitting open, bleeding freely. “Really hurts. Wonder what kind of hunter got a hold of you.” He dropped the gown. He tapped the flat of the blade against Frerin’s chest, the vampire unconscious. The only sound coming from the room was the beeping of a machine. He was hesitating… why was he hesitating? “You know… I would have left you to being just a freak if it hadn’t been for Tauriel and Kili. You were right under my nose… and I didn’t notice. But to keep them safe, to make sure you have no more victims and leave behind shattered families… well, this is just business, now isn’t it? Just an investment of safety for the future.” He pulled up the knife into the air. “I’m sure you understand.”

The knife flashed in the light as he plunged down.

 

\---------------------------------------------

The room twisted, tile and cement split. His eyes watched the debris float upwards before catching fire and disappearing into an endless darkness. The bright flare of light simply became embers up high before burning a hole into that sea of nothing leaving a pin prick of light. He leaned forward, pulling at the tightness around his arms. He twisted his torso, hair falling over his knee as he tried to get a better look up at a sky of stars that was starting to form.

Fili’s lips moved on their own, as if saying speaking only no sound came forth. His tongue was too thick and heavy to move. His skin numb and mouth dry.

Something was wrong. So wrong.

“Fili, do you need to go back to your room?” A sweet voice came to his ear.

He ignored it, he was only half aware of the people in the common room. He was only allowed here because he was so drugged that he couldn’t swallow, drool slipping down his lip. His hallucinations kept him from violent outbursts capturing his attention in their abstract forms. But from the last time they thought he was safe to be around he had scratched an orderly’s arm from shoulder to wrist, leaving ribbons of skin. By requirement of the hospital he had to be in a straight jacket.

“Time for your medicine.” Someone said beside him voice muddled like he was under water, then again, everything sounded like he was under water. He didn’t even feel the poke of a needle. He blinked, slowly looking at the woman in a black long sleeved shirt and green scrubs. Her hair was long and red. He didn’t like the way she smiled at him.

Thankfully she wasn’t there for long, getting up and going to the wall to throw away the needle in a sharps dispenser. He looked back up towards the stars. He liked stars.

“Hey, kiddo.”

Fili jerked, his back slamming into the back of his seat. The voice had been crystal clear, startling him. His eyes locked onto a figure that stood across the room. Long black hair with dusty brown eyes, a comforting smile. 

“Fffff,” Fili couldn’t get his body to work. He couldn’t even say the name of his father.

Frerin looked as young and handsome as he was fifteen to sixteen years ago. His long hair was in three large braids, two spilling over his shoulder, the other resting low against his back. Fili blinked and he was gone. 

He felt his chair shake, it started to move on its own. He rolled his head from one side to the other before he realized he was in a wheel chair. Someone was pushing him out of the common room and towards the doors.

“Time to go back to your room, Fili.” A siren like voice sung down to him. 

He shook his head trying to gain back what little sense he had. It only served to make him dizzy and feel sick. His vision blurring to the point he could barely make out colors. His head was heavy, he couldn’t hold it up for much longer.

“Fili.” His eyes strained to look up, he didn’t have the energy to move his head any more. He saw Frerin standing to a side hallway. He raised up a hand, waving to him.

The young vampire lurched with what little energy he could towards his father, Frerin looked even younger. He made a pathetic, “uh, uh!” sound that made him slump over the arm of the wheelchair.

Frerin squatted down, arms out wide. “Come on buddy, you get to live with me from now on.” He wiggled his fingers, his smile never wavering. “Let’s go home.”

Fili shoved himself in that direction once more, now even louder as he started to scream out nonsensical sounds.

“Calm down.” Tauriel tried to keep her voice in check as to not bring more attention to herself beyond what he was creating as she pushed him further down the hall, Frerin disappearing from sight. 

They were coming up to the elevators. Fili saw Frerin once again far down the hallway. He was sitting on the floor, leaned up against a couple of vending machines. He waved a hand while holding up a bottle.

“Fili! Over here!!”

This time Fili threw himself out of chair, screaming fully. He writhed on the ground trying to move towards his father who opened his arms again. 

“Come on, son. Come to daddy.”

The image of Frerin disappeared, whisked away like a smoke on a gust of wind. Fili’s shoulders were being grabbed as Tauriel started to heft him off of the floor but his weight compared to her strength was something she couldn’t handle. As she struggled Fili saw someone running down the hall towards them. 

“Hey!!”

The witch looked over to the hunter that was racing towards her. 

“Get the fuck away from him!!!” Thorin shouted as he made himself run faster.

The elevator doors opened, she dropped Fili’s dead weight, his head cracking against the floor. She calmly walked into the elevator, the doors closing in time for Thorin to see her face. She sighed, she’ll have to plan something else in order to get a hold of Fili.

“Fili. Fili!” Thorin threw himself onto his knees, grabbing the material of the straight jacket and pulling his son up as if he was nothing but a sack of flour. “Fi-” 

Thorin’s eyes unfocused. His chest lanced with pain as if his heart was trying to stop beating. Something severed. Cut completely off. Frerin… 

The world tilted. His strength instantly gave out, his hands laxing as he slumped against Fili, his eyes glazing over. He had as much life as a puppet without the puppeteer. He could hear a scream down the hall behind him as everything died into a hazy darkness. 

He didn’t need to be told what had happened. He could feel it.

Frerin was dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Join me in the sequel!


End file.
